Do high needs babies turn into high needs preschoolers? - Page 2

[darcytrue]

My 7 yr old was a high needs baby. She was so hard the first year and it began pretty much the day I brought her home from the hospital. She has always been very outspoken, stubborn, strongwilled and at this age she is a very dramatic 7 yr old going on 16. She already slams doors and throw teenage tantrums. But she is also very outgoing, intelligent, and social and for that I'll gladly put up with her bad moments. I know she is going to grow in to a very strong woman. Her personality proves that to me.

[jewelsJZ]

My high needs baby is now a somewhat needy almost-six year old but it is easier. I get him now. I know what sets him off, so I can plan. I can talk to him, he is easier to reason with the older he gets. He remembers what he's been through and can recall what will help him when he's having a rough day. I still have to supervise him constantly with other kids, that's always been an issue, but he is otherwise very independent. He is doing great in Kindergarden. As someone said in a previous post on this thread, he does great there and saves the drama for at home.

Things that helped us were the Spirited Child book mentioned earlier, Occupational Therapy (he has sensory issues) and consulting with a psychologist who helped us understand that anxiety is the root of many of his behaviors and how to help him deal with that. It also helps to have a teacher who is on board with helping him and not just writing off his behavior as defiant or annoying or whatever.

And at times, even though he is my most challenging of my 3 kids, he is easier than my dramatic three year old, fit throwing, potty refusing daughter, whom I love dearly, by the way.

[kennedy444]

My super high need baby/toddler matured into a lovely little one (around age 6) and is now THE BEST TEEN (almost 16). I realize now that I would much rather have a "hard" little one and an easy teen.

[ChristaN]

Originally Posted by Hokulele

...I feel like she hasn't grown out of that high needs thing, but I don't know where to find out about high needs preschoolers. Has anyone else found that the traits continue beyond babyhood? ...DD is a wonderful, caring sensitive, smart child. But everything with her is extreme:

- When she was in a temper tantrum phase, her tantrums would last for hours - 3-4 hours. She'd lose her voice from screaming so much.
- Her emotions are extreme. ...
It seems like no one else I know IRL has a child like this, but then, no one I knew had a high needs baby. Is this normal for a child to stay so extreme into the preschool years. Does it go beyond this?

This sounds a lot like my oldest dd, now 11 y/o. She screamed constantly as a baby and never slept. She had extreme stranger anxiety from birth it seemed. She was also a miserably difficult toddler and preschooler who threw the most amazing tantrums I have ever seen. They lasted for hours every day and her high-pitched screaming sounded like she was being hurt. She, too, is a bright, sensitive child.

I haven't read the rest of the thread, but I did like the book, Raising your Spirited Child when she was a preschooler. At 11, she still has intense emotions and feelings but is better able to handle them. She is generally a great kid to be around. Other adults love her and I really enjoy her a great deal myself. She seems to be fairly popular with other kids, although I don't expect her to be a head cheerleader or anything . I figure that I am finally getting positive pay back for the hard work she was as a little person.