Reasonable family contribution/chore list? - Page 2

[Linda on the move]

Originally Posted by zebra15

I am guilty of not training DS on laundry out of fear he will make an error and ruin it but I am starting to teach him how to work the machines.

My youngest almost 12 and just started sorting her own laundry. I felt the same way you did!

You son does plenty, and what makes sense for each family is bound to be different.

[Storm Bride]

Originally Posted by zebra15

DS is 9 and we HS so my view could be a bit different. I've always been single and up until a year ago never had a roommate etc. so I've needed DS to 'help' me.

That's interesting. When I had more on my plate (both when I was still dragging around a husband who contributed nothing, and then when I was a single mom), I expected less of ds1, in many ways. I could have used the help, but I could never find the time to teach him how to do things, or supervise while he learned. He's had to do a lot more since dh moved in. (DS1 was always helpful, but not in the sense of doing things himself - he'd help me carry home groceries and do whatever I asked him to, if he knew how.)

[zebra15]

Originally Posted by zebra15

DS is 9 and we HS so my view could be a bit different. I've always been single and up until a year ago never had a roommate etc. so I've needed DS to 'help' me. Even now w. living w. a roommate DS(9) can: clean his room, take out the trash, load/unload the dishwasher (we dont handwash), he can sort laundry, change his sheets, walk the dog, straighten up the yard ( oranges are falling from the tree) and he is pretty much responsible for his own school work. I am guilty of not training DS on laundry out of fear he will make an error and ruin it but I am starting to teach him how to work the machines. He does fold and put away his things and he helps the sitter w. her laundry.

I think what has helped is chores arent really chores, they are just things that need to be done. In my mind they are life skills (HS approach here) and we DS and I start by doing things together. Its kinda fun !

**I dont want anyone to think DS does all those things on a weekly/daily basis, these are things DS knows how to do and I can say "DS go do X" and it will get done and he can do it by himself.

[journeymom]

I think I may have fallen off the good teacher wagon when I let life pass me by. I have a bit of a complex about that and feel like I need to "make up" some of those skills with her.

So maybe you're feeling a little guilt, and a little anxiety about time passing? Don't worry, you're doing great. You're daughter is 10 y.o., still quite young, and is going to learn lots more in the next 8 or so years that she's with you.

[sugarrush]

at 11- i think they should be getting some sort of responsibility.. at least to clean up their room and help with the dishes