Ideas...PLEASE!

[dillonandmarasmom]

DS will be 7 in April. He has coslept since birth, and on only a handfull of occasions has he slept most of the night without anyone else in bed with him. Lately, actually since DD and I decided to sleep in the kids' playroom, DS has been more aware when DH leaves the bed. DD will usually sleep okay without me there, but DS just *knows* when he is alone. He will wake up, sit up and cry or whine, "Daddy..." until one of us returns to him.

This is causing some serious problems with DH and I now that we have a third and time together is nearly impossible t come by. We are trying to get the kids to sleep in the playroom together, which they did (with me) when I first became pregnant witht he third. It was our attempt to get them to sleep together so when baby came, DH and I could be together with baby in our bed again.

Well, we are at a breaking point. We have been very honest with DS about how we are feeling about the sleep situation. DH told him that he and I even feel crankly toward one another when we don't get to ly together. DS and DH will talk and talk about solutions--nightlights, removing all of the things that look scary in the dark, etc--but, ultimately, when night comes, DS is adament that he sleep with DH or I.

This has been very frustrating and has caused DH and I to cease meeting up int he living room for one-on-one time since it makes it really uncomfortable to have to listen with one ear for DS....not to mention worry about him getting up and finding us in the living room!

Any advice or ideas?? We are desperate!


TIA!!!!

[Maluhia]

I think sleeping with his sister is ideal, can he go down to sleep in that room as well rather than starting with DH?

Are you willing to do a reward chart for staying with DD in the playroom?

[dillonandmarasmom]

Originally Posted by Maluhia

I think sleeping with his sister is ideal, can he go down to sleep in that room as well rather than starting with DH?

Are you willing to do a reward chart for staying with DD in the playroom?

DH asked me the same thing this morning...about a reward system. We are hesitant, but it may be what works. Can you give an example or two of appropriate rewards?

[red17]

Not knowing your exact philosophy on different issues makes this a bit challenging... for my DD, it is getting to play a specific game that may take a while to set up or it may be a special trip to the Library (we go often, but the one in a local town has a computer section for children that really is quite educational rather than game like).

My DH and I got her a Wii for Christmas. She knows that she can only play it when she has been good during the day. And, since I have chosen not to learn how to set it up, she needs to wait for DH to get home.

Does your DS like to cook something special... you can make that a reward. (DD likes to make her version of croissants -- pillsbury cresents filled with whatever she likes ... dried fruit, berries, chocolate, even mac&cheese (that one really sounded strange, but she eats it! Even though this is not expensive to let her do, it is a treat or reward for very good behavior, esp when she has had a few days of less than stellar behavior.))

I hope that helps. Chin up Mama. Maybe the idea of sleepovers only is appealing for girls?? But when my DD mentions it, I tell her that not everyone can sleep with Mama and Daddy. But, in our case, DD is 4 and sleepovers are only with cousins who don't live closeby.
Good luck Mama. Things will get betterl

[dillonandmarasmom]

Thanks red17. We are thinking of having a little spinner with four possible results:

Family adventure
Family out to dinner
Movie night
Day with dad

These are DS' favorite things, so let's hope he is motivated!