How to help my 5yo sleep longer, or at least let me sleep?

[emmaegbert]

5yo started waking up SUPER early lately. Its driving me nuts. He climbs in my bed (Often with a soaking wet diaper on, thats a whole other story) and proceeds to toss and turn and wake up the 8mo. And me. And his dad. And we're all MISERABLE because its like 4:15AM.

He stopped napping a few months ago. Goes to sleep with no problem at 7PM. Some days he sleeps until 6- those are good days. Hes so obviously feeling better and doing better. I hate and fear the days where he's aroused so early- his behavior is so bad, we adults are at the end of our ropes. Once in a while I can nap, but mostly I have too much work to do.

He sleeps on the floor next to our "big bed". I've given him a sort of ultimatum- he has a few days to get it together (quietly leave the room and play by himself) or he'll ahve to start sleeping in the office, and only can come in after some set time (maybe 5:30).

Mornings have just been total hell.

Any brilliant tips? Is room-sharing just going to have to end? Part of me thinks that isn't a big deal (he's 5 after all) and part of me is sad about that.

[Maluhia]

Maybe it's the diaper? I'd say at 5 you can work on peeing before bed and night-dryness to allow him to be asleep longer?

[Nillarilla]

maybe he's waking because he has to pee. That's why my 3yr old wakes at 2 am. You could try taking him to the bathroom when you go to bed or at like 11pm and just sitting him on the toilet half asleep. If he pees then he might make it to 6am without having to go again.

[emmaegbert]

hmm, I've thought about it being the pee but I already take him sometimes 2 times to pee (well, each of us does before we go to bed) and he's still been wet virtually every day for months now. I dunno, maybe the issues are related (and we've tried a lot, like dairy elimination, chiropractic, and homeopathy, for the bed-wetting). Keep hoping he's about to grow out of it but sheesh.

Thanks for the feedback though.

[bluets]

magnesium deficiency is linked to night-time bed-wetting. but definitely, solving the bed-wetting would go a long way to helping with the night-time waking.

[rzberrymom]

Originally Posted by Nillarilla

You could try taking him to the bathroom when you go to bed or at like 11pm and just sitting him on the toilet half asleep. If he pees then he might make it to 6am without having to go again.

Yep! I do this with my almost 5 year old every night and it eliminates the early wakings.

[emmaegbert]

well, I'll look into the magnesium issue, since the taking him to the toilet before I go to bed, sadly, doesn't work (it did like 2 years ago but things have gotten worse lately...)

[Nillarilla]

what about gluten elimination?

[bluets]

Originally Posted by Nillarilla

what about gluten elimination?

gluten intolerance can contribute to magnesium deficiency, among others. indeed, if dairy alone didn't work, i'd be willing to bet that dairy + gluten elimination (for at least 3 months) would certainly help. food intolerances in general throw off mineral levels, and some of those minerals are critical in muscle function (which is what bed-wetting requires).

food intolerances can also raise cortisol and contribute to adrenal dysfunction which would definitely explain the early rising.

however, a quick way to start would be epsom salt baths with lots of epsom salt - like 2c. in 3-4" of water. also, you could consider adding Kid Calm or Natural Calm - a drink with magnesium. if those work, you've at least bought yourself temporary relief but the next step would be then to figure out what is causing the underlying magnesium imbalance/deficiency.

[SeekingJoy]

He may just need less sleep than you think. We tried a few things when DS went through a similar stage (but without the diaper dilemma).

* Moved bedtime to later. Eventually, through trial and error we figured out that he needs about 10.5 hours of sleep.

* We made a house rule that if he woke before 6, he could watch PBS kids or play his gameboy. But, no matter what, he could not wake DD, DH and me up. I am not crazy about screen time, but 30 minutes of Mario was the best of several bad alternatives. It also seemed to eliminate the half-awakes of non-rest during that extra hour in bed spent rolling around and keeping us all awake.

* We also majorly increased his exercise and stress coping mechanisms. He is a high energy kid and needs to MOVE, but is also fairly emotional and needs ways to appropriately process things he found stressful. Running around helped with both.

[kdtmom2be]

DD gets up earlier than the rest of the family most mornings. She's only 2.5 but is quite capable of getting herself a snack and turning on the TV. I set it to the knowledge network before I go to bed and she's allowed to watch it until I get up. I am not a huge fan of TV either, but like PP said, it's the best of several other bad alternatives.

[Ell-Bell]

DS is almost 4 and wakes at 5:30 am ready to head downstairs. He wakes at this time to get up and go pee- then instead of going back to his room he comes and gets me. He goes to bed at 6:00, and is asleep by 6:30- sometimes earlier! You might try an EARLIER bedtime, and getting him up once in the middle of the night to pee. Sometimes I notice that the nights he goes to sleep earlier he sleeps in longer.

Right now we have a rule that parents sleep until 6:00. He can snuggle with us, or play in his room, but we need to sleep. So far this hasn't been working too well- it usually results in him staring at the clock and saying, "Mommy! It's 5:46! Mommy, it's 5:47!, Mommy, it's 5:48!"

I'd like to get one of those clocks that changes color and picture when it's morning time.

[emmaegbert]

WELL... before baby sister was born in the spring, he would sometimes go play on his own. but now I think he sees her there snuggling with us and just doesn't want to be left out. its so annoying for us though! especially when he wakes her up!

he's totally capable of getting a snack and playing (we do no screen time and don't even have a tv, so that's not really an option) but he just doesn't WANT to in the morning. Also, he claims he is afraid to be in the living room alone. We've set up a little lego-play area in the other (closer) room, maybe I can convince him to play in there. Hmm. I'll talk to DH about getting the CD player out where he could put in his own music to listen to, something along those lines... I really don't know what to do about it! Today was a horrible day! He was up at 4:30 and exhausted and irritable all day. I am trying an earlier bedtime (well, esp today). Past few mornings was more like 5:30. Sigh. I don't know.

I don't really think he has food intolerances. I mean, maybe I am in denial about it, but I swear, this kid is so hale and hearty. He is big (95th percentile for height, 80th for weight), healthy, and so very energetic. I wonder about the PP who talked about getting enough energy and emotional processing time. I am very conscious of DS's need for movement and make sure he gets a LOT of play time every day (he's always been like that). We send him to a half-day Waldorf kindy to make sure he gets plenty of time to move and play! But with adjusting to a new sibling, maybe there is something to that...

anyway, we're seriously considering taking him to see our MW who is also an alternative medical practitioner, if she thinks its necessary could evaluate him for other things like food allergies, mineral imbalances.

thanks for all these ideas. we're traveling soon but when we return I think we're going to see if she can help determine if these things (nighttime peeing, early waking) are symptoms of a bigger problem or just something to wait out.

[LynnS6]

I'd seriously move his bedtime later.

I realize my kids are on the lower end of normal for their need for sleep, but our 5 1/2 yo goes to sleep about 9:30-10 and wakes at 7:30. That's 9 1/2 to 10 hours of sleep. If he goes to sleep at 7 pm, waking at 4:30 or 5 am is the same amount of sleep. (Our 8 year old gets about an hour less a day and is thriving.)

[ssh]

My 4 year old DD sleeps 10 hours, sometimes 9. If she went to bed at 7 she would be up at 4 or 5.

[SeekingJoy]

Yup, I posted earlier up thread that DS (4.5) gets 10.5 hrs of sleep a night. When he is in a growth spurt it increases, when he has a mellow week, it decreases.

What about audio books on the CD player? Mine LOVE audiobooks, too.

[ann_of_loxley]

I second taking him to the toilet before you go to bed. This is what we did with my son. As we also practiced EC, just sitting him on his potty let him 'release' and 'go' without him even being awake. He would sleep in much later then as well. Because it sounds like him having a super wet nappy on is what is waking him up ...and I know that if I wake up early, thats it - I am awake! I can not for the life of me get myself back to sleep! lol