What do you do all day with a 2 month old?

[Xavismom]

Well, almost 2 months, DS is 7 weeks yesterday.

I have no experience being around babies prior to DS! And I have no idea really what I should be filling our day with now that he is not sleeping all day anymore. He can hold his head up no problem now, and he likes to sit if I help him. He has been able to hold toys from week 1, but just this last week I think he finally realized he was holding something, but he still has no idea what to do with it.

Here is what we ARE doing:

He has a book that is filled with bold black & white graphics, and he really has seemed to like this from day one. I hold him and we look at all the pictures a few times

I carry him around the house, and try to get him to look at things. He loved the xmas tree, but now its gone. He likes mirrors.

I've started reading things outloud to him bc he seems to like to hear my voice. So when I open mail, or look at something, instead of reading silently to myself, I read it outloud to him.

We listen to music, sometimes this puts him to sleep.

We do tummy time, but he only likes this for about 10-15 min before he gets mad about it.

We do lots of cuddling and nursing.

This seems like an Ok list written out I guess... but in reality, I have 8 hrs of alone time with him everyday while DH is as work, and most of the time I am just at a loss of what to do. He seems to want to be constantly DOING something, or he fusses. So I just go back and forth with these things... like.. ok.. lets look at the black and white book for like the 800th time...

I cant wait for it to get warmer so we can go out for walks, and go swimming and such. We are housebound since DH and I share a vehicle.

Any suggestions?? Help Mamas! I am a baby newbie.

[Norasmomma]

Do you wear him?

Honestly it sounds like you do almost too much. I mean I think that sometimes fussiness is a communication tool of I need a break. I'm talking looking at the black and white book-those are ultra stimulating for babies. Reading/talking aloud is great.

My son is 3.5 months and I don't do half of that, but I also have a 3 year old. Personally I would bundle him up and see if he likes to go outside.

My son really hates tummy time-my DD did too, 10-15 minutes was(is) tops in our house.

[lkmiscnet]

Wow! You sound like a great mom!

I think that sometimes we feel we have to keep our babies occupied every waking minute. They just want to be around you.

My neighbor is in her early 80s and had 7 kids. She told me that babies need to learn that they can't always be entertained and that they can be okay on their own.

She said that she would have the baby in the room she was in and would just go about her work (e.g. ironing, folding laundry, cooking, etc). She would just put her baby on a blanket on the floor so she could keep an eye on the baby and do her thing while the baby played with a toy.

You can also add in wearing your baby too.

Sounds like you are doing great!

Linda

[CageFreeFamily]

You're doing great, Mama.
That's a lot of great interaction with your babe. Your post sounds like me with my first DS. He was born in winter and I shared a car with DH. My DS had pretty severe colic though.
I used to put ds in a sling and walk around the apt. with a book or sing and dance to my favorite music.

Do you have any local moms groups.. API, LLL or a yahoo group of local moms?
If you can meet some other moms you can have them over for a "playgroup."
Consider taking the bus or a taxi to the library, cafe or a museum once a week to get yourself out of the house.

Also, they make infant wool clothes for cold climates. If you get a good hat and jumper you can put ds in a sling, cover him up with a blanket and head out for a walk.

My dd3 is also 7 wks. A few days ago we ran out of wood (our heat source) while dh was in town. I put dd3 in my wrap sling, tucked two blankets around her, made sure she had breathing space and trekked down to the woodpile with ds1. It was only 10 degrees outside and my hands chapped and froze quickly while ds and I loaded wood onto the sled. But when I tucked my hand into her litlle pouch it was very toasty. When we got back inside I uncovered her and found that her head was even a little sweaty under her hat.

And ya know, that trapped cabin fever feling I was struggling with was gone. From a little fresh air and activity I came back and actually found the energy to create a game to get DS1 and DD2 to help me clean up while I carried DD3.



It gets better too. I'll always remember the first day that I was able to put DS on the floor to play while I did laundry Time definitely feels slowed down with your firstborn, but before you know it you will be longing for the "simple" days

[Xavismom]

Thanks for the encouragement Mamas!

I do wear DS, we have a sleepy wrap (which he only likes if we leave the house for some reason) and a ring sling. Sometimes he's content for a while to just BE with me quietly, but there is a lot of fussing too. I absolutely cannot just sit him anywhere and leave him yet if he is awake. He will slowly work himself to a crying fit if I do, and I refuse to let him get anywhere close to a CIO situation.

He sleeps a LOT at night (which I am not complaining about!!) and usually only takes 1 nap a day right now. I try to cuddle/nurse him to sleep for naps during the day, but it usually doesnt work. He'll fall asleep for about 10 min maybe. Then he's fussy unless I am holding him or interacting with him, which I'm totally fine with, I'm just SO bored of the things we have been doing.

And I guess I'm just still really nervous about taking him for a walk outside right now. I know the dog and I could really use it, but I'm a nervous first time Mama and its so cold!

I do try and get out at least on the weekends when I can use the car, and there have been a couple of times when I have gone somewhere late at night just to get out of the house, even to just walk around Target or something, with DS in his wrap.

[SolaSola]

Thanks for the great ideas, I have a 3 months old and am in the same situation, all day is spent with baby. DD only does 5 minute of tummy time and then she get real fussy. These are some of the activities we do:

- Our favorite is bath time. I take a bath with her every morning. She gets to practice walking in the tub and she loves it. It also provides skin to skin contact and relaxes me.

- I give her a massages about once a week.

- I play the guitare and sing to her. She get very verbal when I sing and to me it sounds like she is singing with me.

- I live in a temperate climate so a daily walk is a must for us, because DD gets bored and fussy if she home all day. We live next the a park and the fresh air clears my head. I wear her and she usually promptly falls asleep.

- I wear her when I run errands such as food shopping and she enjoys looking around. I need to get out of the house or I feel depressed.

[Xavismom]

Originally Posted by SolaSola

- Our favorite is bath time. I take a bath with her every morning. She gets to practice walking in the tub and she loves it. It also provides skin to skin contact and relaxes me.

- I give her a massages about once a week.

.

Xavi loves baths too, but I've been scared to give him too many, I'm scared its going to dry his skin out too much, its VERY dry here in the winter and his skin seems so delicate! He loves tub time with mom though, its so fun!

I'm so jealous your DD will let you massage her. I was really looking forward to that since I'm a massage therapist, but DS just isnt into it yet.

[brennan]

I really think that he needs to be sleeping more during the day. Most kids still have 2 naps at 14 months, and your lo is not even 2 months! I think it was around that time that I was told to around every 1hr 30min to start looking for signs of tiredness as see if dd was ready for another nap. That's probably why he's fussing so much. I remember spending what felt like my whole day putting dd to sleep.

I would really recommend going for a walk. We used to go for like 3 walks a day. I would have dd in the wrap all bundled up in a fleece sleeper and hat etc. and then I bought a big coat and would wrap us up in it together. I worked great, and its really cold where I live! This was the best way to get her to sleep for the first 6 months of her life....and it still is at 14 month months

Good luck! It sounds like you're doing a great job and showing that you really care about keeping your lo happy! Keep up the good work!

[mokey4]

Wow, you do so much with your baby! I know I didn't do that much...

When my DD was that little she spent a lot of time sleeping in the moby wrap. Like your DS, I couldn't put her down or she would cry. She needed to be held at all times. When she was awake I would sing to her and walk around the apartment with her. It was cold here but I took her on walks- I'd bundle her up in the Moby and wear an extra large sweater that I could zip up over her and me. She was plenty warm! I went on a lot of long walks.

I also feel like I spent a lot of time just nursing and changing diapers. She would nurse for a looong time and usually sleep for a while too, but would only stay asleep as long as I held her. So I got really good at nursing her on the nursing pillow while sitting at my computer and surfing the net with one hand. Sometimes I would read a book. It was nice that she wasn't so distractable at that age.

[Abraisme]

I suggest getting some girl-friends and doing a lot of play-dates. It's super isolating to be in a house alone with a baby all day. Babies really don't need that much (it sounds like you're doing plenty), but you need adult interaction and stimulation. Go for walks (even if it's cold), invite friends over, take the bus somewhere, get out of the house!

[Xavismom]

Originally Posted by Abraisme

I suggest getting some girl-friends and doing a lot of play-dates. It's super isolating to be in a house alone with a baby all day. Babies really don't need that much (it sounds like you're doing plenty), but you need adult interaction and stimulation. Go for walks (even if it's cold), invite friends over, take the bus somewhere, get out of the house!

I would really like this, but I dont really have any friends. I am really shy and its hard for me to get to know new people... I have been meaning to go to LL meetings in my area, I just havent gotten the courage to go yet.

I do know lots of people with kids, mostly girls I used to work with that I *do* consider friends, but they think I am really strange since I became pregnant with DS, they are not AP type people.

I already felt quite isolated, and now as a SAHM, I do notice its a bit worse. DH has said we will try to get a second vehicle for me by summer, so I hope that will help.

[Xavismom]

Originally Posted by brennan

I really think that he needs to be sleeping more during the day. Most kids still have 2 naps at 14 months, and your lo is not even 2 months! I think it was around that time that I was told to around every 1hr 30min to start looking for signs of tiredness as see if dd was ready for another nap. That's probably why he's fussing so much. I remember spending what felt like my whole day putting dd to sleep.

Any other tips for getting DS down for a nap? When I said I have no experience with babies... I really meant it! DS was the first tiny baby I've ever even held.

He'll fall asleep if I am wearing him, but only if I am walking. The second Is stop, he wakes up. I guess I can try to venture out of the house for a walk tmrw! The only other thing I know how to do is nurse him to sleep.

[CageFreeFamily]

When I said I have no experience with babies... I really meant it! DS was the first tiny baby I've ever even held.

My DS1 was the first baby I had ever been around as well. The biggest thing I've learned in the seven years between DS1 and DD3 is to trust that I know how to do the right thing for my kids. Trust yourself, listen to what your baby tells you, and you will do great.

[lilabet]

Originally Posted by Xavismom

Any other tips for getting DS down for a nap? When I said I have no experience with babies... I really meant it! DS was the first tiny baby I've ever even held.

He'll fall asleep if I am wearing him, but only if I am walking. The second Is stop, he wakes up. I guess I can try to venture out of the house for a walk tmrw! The only other thing I know how to do is nurse him to sleep.

You could try lying him down on a cushion on your lap when he seems a little bit sleepy, and very gently either pat him or just place your hand on his chest, so he can feel you're there. Maybe SHHHHH if he likes that (Fraser is so used to it I've realised if he fusses as he is going down at night, just little grumbles, if I open his door and say shhhh he goes right to sleep! Good association to build if you can!) After a while of this you might be able to move the cushion off your lap and put it next to you, and then eventually you'll be able to put him down awake in his own place and then pat (or hold hand on chest) and shhhh and he will drift right off, no crying needed. Little babies of 2 months shouldn't be crying unattended but it sounds like you know that anyway. If he falls asleep while you're walking then you know if you pop him in the wrap and go for a long walk he will get a lovely long sleep, and you will get some exercise which is always great for us new moms!

Honestly if you can get comfortable with it, you really should be trying to give him fresh air everyday, it's very important for his health. The amount I bundle up Fraser I swear he is warmer than me when we go out! And 2 months is a brilliant age because you can still carry them in a wrap or sling for a while, I can do short trips with my 7.5 month old in my baby bjorn but for longer trips he has to go in the back carrier and I miss his little head under my chin If you are worried about the cold then bundle him up as much as you think and then take a little backpack with a couple more blankets in, just in case.

[aiyasmama]

It sounds like you're doing great!

Definitely take him for walks. Wear him the whole time, well-bundled. Reach in to check his little hands every once in a while and make sure he's warm. You will both really enjoy it! With my first we walked at least an hour every day, even in Boston winter, and it's one of my fondest memories of her babyhood.

You can wear him around the house while you do housework, talk on the phone, etc. This will get easier around 6-7 months when you can wear him on your back.

My first baby never wanted to be put down but my second loves to lie on her back and kick her legs around. Babies have different temperaments, so just stay sensitive to what your baby is needing, which it sounds like you are!

I hope you can work up the courage to join a playgroup, go to LLL, etc. It will make a world of difference for you as a SAHM. I used to be very shy but I've really "come out of my shell" a lot the last three years as a mom and it's been life-changing.

[cileag]

well, shoot, I was going to suggest you check out the API website to see if they had a support group listed but Utah isn't even listed, which is strange.

I found that a La Leche League meeting was pretty API friendly for the most part---you don't have to have friends that share everything in common with your parenting styles anyway---just like I'm assuming your regular friends aren't 100% in agreement with your values as well.

I too would third getting out--I'm in MN and we go on walks outside and it's icy and snowy but Phoebe loves it!

Other suggestions:
Join a gym and walk around the track with her (I find that Phoebe is more content if I walk "with a purpose" for whatever reason).
Check out the Find Your Tribe here on MDC if you haven't already.
Join Netflix.
Start knitting.

Good luck! He'll get more interactive soon!

[MamaKickyPants]

I just wanted to say that there is more danger to over-heating,than being a little cool, when babywearing. It's the same principle of not over bundling them to sleep at night - it can affect their breathing.

I live in Toronto, and my parents live in Ottawa. It gets COLD here. Like, -20 Celsius cold. I take DS outside EVERY day, no exceptions, and did so from about 1 month old. There are three components to keeping warn, IMO: Layers, natural fibres, and body heat. I would dress DS like this: baby-legs and a onesie, a thick cotton sleeper, and then into a one-piece fleece snowsuit, then zipped my jacket over him, making sure not to cover his head over. Oh- a warm hat is a must. If I was putting him inside my down babywearing coat, I'd skip the snow-suit, and maybe even the onesie. Don't underestimate how warm you little one will be from your body heat. I used 'Padraig' wool, sheepskin-lined booties for his feet.

Go outside!! It will do wonders for both you and baby.

My SIL is Norwegian, and they live in Oslo. They put the baby in a sheepskin, put him in the stroller, and leave him outside on the balcony for up to two hours, for his nap. This is very normal there, and you will often see a couple of strollers with sleeping babies parked outside of shops, while their mamas are inside!

[Rowansmama]

When DD was that age, I did pretty much whatever *I* felt like doing (as opposed to now, when she's 2, and we have more of a structured day of routines and activities).

I went to the bookstore a lot with her in a sling and just sipped coffee and read magazines. I went on lots of walks. DH and I would go out to dinner and she'd hang out with us. I went to mom's groups where we'd chat while the babies napped. And of course we snuggled a lot and you know, looked at baby toys and books and stuff.

I think a baby that age is pretty content just to be with you, interacting with the world.

[Norasmomma]

Originally Posted by Xavismom

Thanks for the encouragement Mamas!

I do wear DS, we have a sleepy wrap (which he only likes if we leave the house for some reason) and a ring sling.



And I guess I'm just still really nervous about taking him for a walk outside right now. I know the dog and I could really use it, but I'm a nervous first time Mama and its so cold!

Well if you took him outside in the wrap with a hat on trust me he'd be plenty warm.

[MeredithK]

I just wanted to say that I can totally relate to what you are experiencing. I am a first time mom of a 3 month old. I am shy and get nervous doing things as well. I don't have any friends nearby and I am home alone all day with a very fussy baby.

DS doesn't nap well, either. But, I have found that if I can catch him while he's still in a fairly good mood, but looks tired, I can put him in his swing. I was nervous at first to do this, but it works. He'll sleep a little in there and it gives me a little time to do something non baby related (although I don't know if doing laundry is all that exciting). I can get at least 30 minutes that way.

It is hard to fill the time, but it will get better for you. As your DS gets more interactive, it becomes easier. Now, we can spend a good half an hour just laughing with each other. Then, diaper changes take a while since we play on the changing table.

We don't go for walks because it's always raining here and I don't know how that would work out. So, I understand you not wanting to get out in the cold.

Just know that the more times you try something, the easier it becomes. I tell myself that constantly.

Sometimes psyching yourself up for something like a walk or a meeting can help...or you can always PM me and know you are talking with someone who is going through the same things!