Can somebody share some co-sleeping basics?

[marinak1977]

Hi Everyone, I'm a first time mom of a 9 day old boy. While he starts off the night snuggled in a basket next to the bed he seems to be happiest when he gets to stay by my side skin-to-skin after the first night feeding. I was originally going to have a sidecar crib so that he can sleep safely, but now I love having him next to me at night. I would love to hear some co-sleeping basics and advice. I am a very light sleeper, and use a receiving blanket (not my down comforter) to cover him and my chest, and I'm beginning to feel more confident about not squishing him at night. What should I know before I embark on this journey?
Thank you!

[Snapdragon]

hey- I just wanted to say I remember you from the ttc forum when we were both ttc! COngrats on your new baby!

[crunchy_mommy]

Hmm I think you are already doing what you need to do!!! I got way more sleep once I stopped trying to put DS back in the co-sleeper... I had a love/hate relationship with that thing!! lol!! I love having DS beside me That said, I guess my only advice is, make sure your bed is really safe (we have just a mattress on the floor, you could also use bed rails etc. to prevent your baby from accidentally falling off).

[Ravenlunatic]

I agree with crunchy mama, it sounds like you are doing great. I did some of the same things too.

I had a side rail so the baby wouldn't roll off the bed. I wore pajamas to bed and did not use a blanket for myself (thank goodness we live in a warm climate), but also I just kept the heat pumped up. I dressed the baby so she would not need a blanket. I slept with no pillow. I too am a light sleeper and would wake up if the baby breathed even slightly different than normal but I would sleep on my side and would leave my hand flat on the bed right next to the baby - almost like wedge - so if the baby rolled toward me and I was sleeping my hand would prevent her from rolling all the way into my body. We slept like this for months, modifying what we needed as she grew.

[sunfish21]

I started bed sharing with DD right away and at first used one of those foam wedges...it has an opening in the middle where the baby lies but then a few inches on either side is a foam wedge covered in fabric. It made me feel better about not rolling onto her in the middle of the night. Of course, like pp I was such a light sleeper I quit using it after awhile but it reassured me at the beginning. I might even use it again with this next one, as DD is almost two and it would provide a "hands off" area. Good luck and congrats on the baby!

[pixiekisses]

The basics are mostly a not-too-soft matress, and you and your SO can not sleep with baby if you are smoking or have been drinking.
And make sure the room is not too hot, the guidelines here are 18 c (64.4 f). That's because there is a link between overheating and SIDS.
I sleep with a pillow, and my comforter. And then we have a light wool blankie with holes over the baby and the top of me. And baby sleeps in a wool jammie now in winter, and on a sheepskin.
I sleep so lightly that I feel every movement from the baby, and so does SO.

[marinak1977]

Thank you for your replies everyone! I feel better now it sounds like I'm on the right track. Currently he ends up sleeping halfway between on his side and on his back, wedged in the crook of my arm with the back of his head resting in my elbow and his face laying either on my belly or on my breast. I have him dressed in a diaper and take off my pajama top so that he can be warm from my skin and then cover us both with a receiving blanket. I wake up often just to glance down and see that his face is open and unobstructed (that doesn't seem to make me tired) Sometimes he falls asleep on the nipple (when I'm on my side) but I usually stay awake until I make sure he's not sinking under the boob.
When he gets hungry he nuzzles me awake and I help him latch, but he doesn't seem to be bothered by his diaper and usually goes without changing for about 7 hours and the diaper is usually pretty empty in the morning. He does most of his pooping during the day. I definitely get a lot more sleep that way as I don't have to get up.
Our bed is a memoryfoam mattress, so it's moderately soft, I haven't put a safety rail up yet, but I think we'll end up pushing the crib to the bed anyways so it'll act as a safety guard on that side. So far he's pretty much not going anywhere further than my elbow.
I love having him next to me like that. Especially when I glance down in the middle of the night and see that sweet sleeping face on my belly...

[pixiekisses]

Another important basic; if he's sleeping on the outside, as in closest to the edge, or if you ever leave him alone in there, please push that bed up as railing right now. Many, many tiny babies have fallen out of beds or couches because parents thought they weren't "supposed" to be moving much at just a few weeks old, and they didn't seem able to move out of their arms. But they suddenly do. I did as a 3 week old baby.

[pixiekisses]

You can have the baby in the middle. That is not a problem.
And you don't need a co-sleeping nest at all. We've never used one.

[crunchy_mommy]

Originally Posted by pixiekisses

You can have the baby in the middle. That is not a problem.
And you don't need a co-sleeping nest at all. We've never used one.

Ditto to that unless your DH is a very heavy sleeper. Mine is (and has practically rolled over ME before) so I always have a barrier between DS & DH (usually a pillow, that I make sure if below DS's shoulder height).