What is the right thing??

[nwatt]

I am having a lot of issues with my DD when it comes to naps, and I don't know what to do.

She used to nurse to sleep for naps and then sleep on my mybrestfriend pillow. I could get walk around, eat, watch tv, whatever I needed to do, and she would nap. She stopped doing that about a month ago, so then we moved to naps in the swing (in her cosleeper just never worked). I have tried just wearing her, but she wakes up the second I stop moving or even if my pace changes. To get her to sleep, I have to bounce her holding her on a yoga ball (sometimes while nursing). I used to be able to put her down in the swing, but that has stopped working, she might stay asleep for 10 minutes, and then she wakes up.

A couple of weeks ago I was really stressed and I put her down in the swing awake. She talked/mildly fussed for awhile (5 to 20 minutes), and then fell asleep. I only did this for a few days, though, because I felt guilty and that I was abandoning her, even though I sat by the swing the whole time. I started bouncing her to sleep and then putting her in the swing again.

The problem now is that not only is putting her down into the swing not working, but she is so heavy that bouncing her is really starting to hurt my back. Every once in awhile she nurses to sleep, and then when I put her down (or even just take a big breath), she wakes up. Today she has taken a total of three naps, two ten minutes and one eight minutes.

She is in the swing right now, awake, and making noises. I feel so guilty! I know she is tired, she just won't sleep, and I cannot take any more bouncing. I try to tell myself that she is okay without long naps, that she is sleeping 12 hours at night with just a few wake ups, but I know she needs them.

What can I do to get her to sleep? Does leaving her in the swing to talk/fuss herself to sleep make me a bad mom? Will it break her trust or stress her too much? And then what do I do when I can't use the swing anymore? She is just about to sit up by herself and is learning to roll back to front.

[RavenStar]

How old is she?
If you want to nurse her to sleep, you could try holding her for longer before you lay her down. I know that's one thing Dr. Sears recommends. Or else you could try laying down with her and nursing if you're comfortable with that. Since she's used to sleeping with movement, you might have to try something fo awhile before she gets used to it.

[Kelly1101]

Do you have a rocking chair or glider? Same motion as a swing, but you can hold her without hurting your back. That's how mine goes down for her naps...

[Icehockey18]

Originally Posted by Kelly1101

Do you have a rocking chair or glider? Same motion as a swing, but you can hold her without hurting your back. That's how mine goes down for her naps...

This is what we do also for naps. Unless he falls asleep in the moby... About the swing, I think if you really need a break to re-group, then the swing is fine. As long as your lo can see you, is not crying, and is not in it all day, I don't think you are a bad mom at all for taking a break for your back!
I have a heavy babe too (22 lbs at 7 mo!) and the moby is great!! He feels like nothing! You might try that, if you don't already babywear...

[BlueWolf]

I don't think you should feel guilty if your DD is fussing in the swing because she's tired. Fussing is not crying. My DD will fuss or talk herself to sleep, even if I'm right there with her. It's just her thing.

[lessmith23]

The rocking chair was a huge help when DD was really little and DH still uses it to put her to sleep when it's his turn. I nurse her then pass her off to dad and he rocks her to sleep.

In terms of the swing, IMO, if your DD will take a longer nap in it then I say use it. Our swing was a lifesaver when DD was really small. She would not, under any circumstances, sleep in her bassinet or crib for longer than a few minutes. In the swing she'd have the good long nap she needed.

The swing was the only thing that worked (DD refused to be carried in a sling) so I used it. I knew we wouldn't always need it and it wasn't like I was just sticking DD in it because I couldn't be bothered attending to her. She needed to sleep and I needed her to sleep.

As for the fussing, you might find that as the quality and length of her naps improve and she begins to get the sleep she needs, she will not fuss as much and go down easier. Maybe not but it's possible.

[Abraisme]

My DD sleeps MUCH better in the dark. Starting around 4mo she decided that she didn't want to miss a single thing. She stopped napping in the Moby or if ANYTHING is going on. Now I've got a routine where I swaddler her up (she still likes this at 5mo), take her into a dark room (we have light blocking shades in our bedroom), nurse her and lay her down. She will only sleep this way, if I disturb her at all she'll wake up. Anyway, you might try a routine and a dark room.