or Connect
Mothering › Mothering Forums › Natural Living › The Mindful Home › Would you let friends in your house THIS MINUTE
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:

Would you let friends in your house THIS MINUTE - Page 2

post #21 of 83
no I couldn't! this is always bugging me, that I can't spontaneously invite friends for coffee because my house is messy.
post #22 of 83
I would. All of my friends are SAHMs so I'm assuming their homes look pretty much like mine. I would hope that they wouldn't stay long enough to have to use the bathroom, though.
post #23 of 83

House is not spotless but 95% clean and not cluttered. (need to mop and clean under the kids beds. oh and then there's the never ending laundry)
post #24 of 83
friends could come over no problem! we have a few small messes and a few toys on the floor, but what are friends for?
i'd also invite the mormons or Jehovah's witnesses in because they wont judge me.
i think if i had 5 more minutes, my home would be stranger ready. i'd just have to kick a few toys into the play room and put our top blankets in the closet. (we dont make our beds every day, we all sleep on top of our comforters with blankets we put in the closet so it just takes 5 seconds to make the bed)
post #25 of 83
Yup, definitely. Only real issue right now is that the tree stand is in the bathtub because DH took out the tree this morning and hasn't had a chance to clean the stand. He's claimed it as his job, so I'm leaving it for him to do. Other than that, everything's clean, beds made, laundry away. There are toys out and lunch prep stuff out, but that's bc the kids are still eating. I prefer the "in active use" over "pin perfect" anyday, then you feel that you can relax and play there.
post #26 of 83
Yep. My wicker chairs have coats on them that need to be picked up and the floor needs vacuuming (especially around the bird cage).. but other than that...
post #27 of 83
Sure, but can I whisk my son out the back door? He's naked from the waist down and covered in paint from the waist up.
post #28 of 83
Yes. Everything is clean. There are some toys and clothes and dishes out of place but it just looks properly lived-in, not messy. I could have it looking spotless in like 15 minutes, anyway.
post #29 of 83
i would, but about a year or two ago, no. i mean, i would not to be rude, but i would feel ashamed of my place.

about two years ago, i got on the stick and decided to just clean up after DH. this was before DS was born. i got into a rhythm and whiel the place was still pretty cluttered, i was able to keep DH's clutter at bay and keep the place generally clean and organized.

16 months ago or so, my mom, sister, and i did a HUGE deep cleaning of our house. unfortunately, DH wouldn't purge, but i did. SO, that got rid of more clutter (not much though, because most of it was DHs which he now admits), and we scrubbed everything. my mother even vaccumed the walls.

i was able, then, to continue with my cleaning pattern and kept DH on the anti-clutter stick.

8 months ago, we decided to move to NZ. DH was psyched. we talked about moving house to NZ, and he realized that there was a lot of stuff in our house that he'd inherited that he didn't really care for, but felt he couldn't let go of while we were here. but he didn't want to move them to NZ.

we went through a ruthless series of purges to get the house ready for market and to prep for our move.

so, in October, when we put the house on the market and immediately sold it. so, we had from october until january 4 to enjoy our clutter free, clean home.

it was fantastic! DH loved it and vowed to continue to remove clutter and live minimally. anyone could come over at any time, and be in any room and i would feel completely at ease.

sure, DS would play with his (minimal) toys and have them spread around the LR, but it takes about 5 minutes to clean up after him! the kitchen was minimal, etc.

so, what about right now?

right now, we are living in the back room of a friend's home. they have a love seat and 1.5 chair in here, a 'bar' area which they set up as a changing station for hteir kiddo (it's an evening "kitchenette/snack bar" for us), and two book cases crammed with books.

we brought in our king-size bed and put that in the middle of the room. . .about 12 inches between that and the chair/love seat combo and plenty of space otherwise where DS plays, etc. we also have a wire rack with wire baskets for all of our clothes, a shoe rack, laundry baskets, and our computers. oh, and DS's toy trunk and instrument trunk.

we have hosted friends back here since we've arrived. we had a jam session with drum, uke, harmonica, rattles, and vocals.

our friends live differently, but they do not seem at all upset to have people in their home when it is cluttered or messy. that's good on them, i think.

i always felt embarassed by the mess and clutter--it was very emotional. getting rid of it has helped me (even though i still need to work on the underlying issue), and getting rid of it has helped DH see and learn about how free and comfortable and calm things can be without clutter.

he said "it is just more relaxing that way." true enough.
post #30 of 83
I would be able to let them in. If they didn't care that it's almost noon and I'm still in my jammies. Everything is pretty tidy and clean today, but I had a housekeeper in yesterday, so that's a little cheaty. Generally speaking, though, my place is tidy enough that I would let anyone stop by.
post #31 of 83
Yes, actually my house is in a lesser state of chaos than usual & I'm dressed (even wearing a bra!). I would still apologize 100x over for the mess though.
post #32 of 83
I'd let them in but I wouldn't let them look in the bedrooms! Guess I know what our cleaning project for this weekend is going to be...
post #33 of 83
Yes, the downstairs is fine. The bedrooms are kind of messy right now though.
post #34 of 83
I would be pretty embarrassed and wouldn't want any friends here at the moment! I'm a procrastinator and am waiting for the weekend to really tidy everything up.
post #35 of 83
Thread Starter 
OP here, very interesting replies. This is on my mind b/c I recently read A Life That Says Welcome, and it's all about hospitality, so I felt all inspired to have people over. Yet three times last week I could have invited a friend and neighbors in/over for an impromptu visit, but didn't do it b/c of household chaos. Not dirty, but meal prep out, counters cluttered, toy mess. I was thinking it was a cleaning issue but after reading these replies I'm wondering if it isn't a perfection issue. Combined with a clutter issue, or at least toy clutter.
post #36 of 83
absolutely invite them in but need to give them my disclaimer "sorry the house is a mess, I was busy playing with the kids all day" my house is always messy but I feel like I clean all day! Right now its raining outside so I have laundry hanging inside wherever I can find a spot. oh well one day!
post #37 of 83
Right now? No. I've been sick with the flu since Wednesday. No dishes have been done, laundry is piling up, toys are everywhere, the dog crates haven't been cleaned out(they get hairy and dirty), and so on.... So no, right now, definitely not.
post #38 of 83
Absolutely I would. Anyone that I consider a real true friend I know won't judge....we all have toddlers, we all get sick, we all don't enjoy housework, and we all have husbands who are plotting against us I know their house gets just as bad as mine....and there are reasons for it. They are not dirty moms who don't care, just moms that don't have all the time in the world to clean

If family or anyone else who stops by wants to judge me for having dirty dishes on the counter or laundry on the bathroom floor my response will be this: 'Instead of doing laundry, folding and putting it away, then cleaning the kitchen and making dinner for my family, I built a train track with my 2 year old and did tummy time with the little one. Dishes can wait!'
post #39 of 83
Originally Posted by hillymum View Post
Friends? They can come in no matter how my home looks! Friends don't judge. Neighbours? Yikes,
post #40 of 83
Originally Posted by 2lilsweetfoxes View Post
Caveat: depends on the friend. The friend who has "I can't stand a mess" issues and would have to stop herself from calling children's services if a stray cookie is left on the shelf by the baby--because that is unsafe and germy, let's meet out and about.
Oops.... I don't think that my sloppy self would be able to be friends with someone like that. Otherwise, friends are always welcome. Neighbors though? I would never let my neighbors in, unless there was a very good reason, anyway.
New Posts  All Forums:Forum Nav:
  Return Home
  Back to Forum: The Mindful Home
Mothering › Mothering Forums › Natural Living › The Mindful Home › Would you let friends in your house THIS MINUTE