Ethical Dilemma, Please Help

[Leta]

I have never declawed a cat. I think it's best avoided, if/when possible.

I have a 7 year old cat. I found her as a tiny, feral kitten, and bottle fed her. She has weird sucking behaviors and is a very needy cat, which is normal for a kitty with her background.

She kneads (y'know, what cats do with their paws when they purr?) very intensely. She's not that into being petted herself, rather, she wants to purr, knead me, suck on the blanket, and then lay on my pillow and/or neck. (I call her "Reverse Elmira", .) This is what she did as a kitten, and what she wants now. I trim her nails to deal with the kneading pokes, but it seems the older she's gotten, the more deeply she kneads.

When DD was an infant and in bed with us, my kitty was careful to avoid her. Now, I guess she's used to babies, so she wants to knead on DS. He is too little and the kitty is too rough (even with trimmed nails), so I end up pushing her away and off the bed.

This really hurts her feelings, and I feel SO BAD doing it- she's a very needy cat. I love her, I hate to see her hurt and sulking.

We've tried those nail covers from the vet/groomer, and she chewed them off within 45 minutes.

So I'm considering getting her declawed, to my own surprise/dismay.

Any thoughts?

[angie7]

Have you tried filing them rounder and smoother? I dremel my dogs nails b/c just trimming them still leaves them sharp. Personally, I wouldn't declaw her b/c I think it is cruel but that's JMO.

[SoulCakes]

Hrmm...

This is just a guess, but I imagine that a full-grown cat is going to be much more traumatized by declawing than a kitten. But I've only known a few declawed kitties, and only one of those was really sensitive about her feet - to the point that you couldn't touch them at all.

I'll admit that cats' claws can be really annoying when they're kneading (we call it "making biscuits" ) and when they get hooked in our clothes, blankets, etc. Not to mention they can piece little baby skin. But is there something else you could do (like keep her out of the room with the baby)? We didn't let our cats into the bedroom at all while DD was teeny, and while they didn't like it, they got over it and once the children are older it's a moot point anyway.

I'd really suggest trying to find another solution until your son is old enough to field the occasional errant kitty claw. Declawing is a permanent solution to a short-term problem.

[North_Of_60]

Originally Posted by Leta

so I end up pushing her away and off the bed.

This really hurts her feelings, and I feel SO BAD doing it- she's a very needy cat. I love her, I hate to see her hurt and sulking.

This might seem a bit blunt, but there's really no other way to say it. You'd rather cut off part of her toes because it makes you uncomfortable to push her off the bed? It's a bit ironic that you don't want to hurt her or cause her to sulk, but are considering declawing. I would suggest researching the procedure a bit more.

Having said that, I totally understand not wanting to "hurt her feelings", but you're basically wanting to put her through major surgery so she can continue with indulgent behavior.

I'm fine with my animals having weird quirks, but it stops when it is painful or damaging to me, my kid, or the furniture. I would definitely go for training/re-conditioning. Could you get her to associate the behavior with a thick blanket so she's not hurting you when she does it?

Keep in mind that declawed cats can end up with arthritis in old age, which can lead to litter box issues. I'd take pushing her off the bed a 100 time a day to her peeing in the laundry basket any day of the week!

I think the behavior you're talking about, as far as last-resort-reasons-to-declaw go, is VERY manageable. Don't do it.

[lifeguard]

Thank you North of 60. Our old girl was declawed (before we got her) & until just now it never occured to me that some of her "quirks" could be because of the declawing. I would certainly trade the occassional scratch to the frustrating peeing on my laundry (that is exactly what she does if things are left on the floor).

[lolar2]

After our cats got over the initial adjustment, they were no longer upset at being shooed away from DS. They were annoyed about it at first and acted all hurt and wronged, but after a few days of consistency they were just fine. It was about at the same stage where you all are now. So I think that shooing a cat away is much more humane than declawing. (Cheaper, too.)

[Mama Mko]

I would never declaw a cat. I'd teach her that the bed is off limits.

[MsVyky]

Try SoftPaws!
http://www.softpaws.com/

Please don't declaw your kitty

[Leta]

I needed to hear this. I did try the soft paws, they lasted less than an hour.

And while I appreciate the suggestions to train her, that just does not fly with this cat. I have trained other cats, and to train Nan to stay off the bed... I don't really know how to explain this, but because she was so tiny when I got her, and had to be bottle fed, she imprinted me as her mom. To train her to stay off the bed would just be... it would just never happen. She would be devastated.

I think that the pp who said it's a permanent solution to a temporary problem is right. I'll keep pushing her away for another few months, then once DS can go all night without snacking, it will no longer be an issue. (Unless we have another kid, but that might not happen at all.)

In the meantime, I think I will try filing the next time I trim her nails. Thanks everyone!

[LeahBoo]

Cut her nails shorter.

My cat kneads like mad, I cut the entire point off the nail. All he's left with are round little nubs that don't hurt at all.