i think i might want to go to church/or something...how? - Page 2

[Tradd]

Originally Posted by BaaBaa

thanks for the ideas the church i went to when i was little doesnt have any youngsters, its mostly elderly, that was my first idea but it doesnt feel like a good match...

i feel overwhelmed for sure! too many options. a friend invited me to attend with her- but im unclear about dd going?

Well, maybe you can find something similar to the church you went to when little. I don't know if it's an indepedent Protestant congregation or something that's part of a more organized denomination (Methodists, for example).

[eepster]

Originally Posted by BetsyS

The churches around here that tend to be most child-friendly are the Catholic ones. They don't have as much of a tradition of the nursery.

Simply having a nursery at all is probably a concession to the traditions of the area. Up around here (north-east) Most of the Catholic churches do not have nurseries. Mine doesn't, and the one my parents belong to doesn't.

In fact children are fully included in the church. The noon time mass is the family mass; children are often invited to come up to the front and participate in the sermon. There is a children's choir that provides the music once a month. Of course there are alter boys and girls, though that's a position for older children, 10-14 yo I think. If you bring the baby up with you when you receive communion, the priest will bless them.

[Comtessa]

Two bits of advice from a liberal Catholic:

1) If you're not familiar with the Catholic mass and aren't feeling a really strong "tug" in that direction, I wouldn't recommend a Catholic church as your first church visit. The Catholic mass is not terribly welcoming of visitors, in my experience, compared to other congregations. (Non-Catholics are not invited to share in the Communion table, for example. And smaller things, too, like the fact that it is assumed that everyone there knows all the prayers - you usually can't find them written down anywhere in order to follow along with the service.) If you have some familiarity with it already, however, you will be pleasantly surprised by how welcoming the worship environment is for children. My church doesn't even have a place for crying children - the priest just talks a little louder to be heard over the screaming. It's a great, rowdy place for families - we love it.

2) You may want to start with something a bit less formal than a church service, if you're looking to rub shoulders with religion but feeling unsure about a "stiff environment." You could look into something like a Bible study, or a women's prayer group, or a religiously-based volunteer program. I've been able to stick it out through a lot of horribleness within my own church (I mean, honestly, I'm Catholic) because of my spiritual "home" within our local Catholic Worker community. It's a bunch of free-range radical intellectuals who are together because we share a desire to live out the Gospel in a gritty, real way... and heaven help anybody who stands in our way. Anyway, getting to church through one of these "side entrances" may make it feel less overwhelming to choose a place to go. A Bible study is a little less threatening (usually) than a whole churchful of people on Sunday morning! And it gives you a chance to ask some questions and feel out the beliefs of the group.

[wombatclay]

The beliefnet "quiz" posted above is always interesting... it may give you some ideas about the sort of religious group you might mesh with.

There is also a series of books called "How to be a Perfect Stranger". They cover dozens of religions and denominations with the sort of detail you've asked about... what to wear, what to expect, what people might expect you to participate in (or what you shouldn't participate in), the general order of the service, special events, even whether or not you can take pictures. The series is a bit on the "old" side so many libraries have them.

[BriarRose19]

If you have a liberal slant and you're interested in a community that involves children than you might be interested in checking out your local Baha'i community. The Baha'i faith is a religion that teaches the unity of mankind, as well as the oneness of religion and the oneness of God. Some of it's major principles are the elimination of prejudice (of any kind), the equality of the sexes, and the harmony of religion and science. Baha'i worship services are usually called Devotions. There is no clergy so usually an individual or a committee is responsible for choosing a selection of Baha'i writings, or scripture from any religious tradition. Depending on the size of the community, there are usually children's classes during devotions so that children can be learning spiritual qualities and virtues at their own pace. At Baha'i children's classes there is often a heavy emphasis on learning to appreciate unity in diversity, celebrating all kinds of religious, cultural, or racial backgrounds. However, if you want your child to remain with you during devotions it's entirely your choice. Baha'i services are pretty laid back, and the community itself is very welcoming. If you want to know more about the Baha'i faith just check out www.bahai.org.
Good luck in your search! I hope you find a welcoming and sustaining community!