Valentines

[expecting-joy]

So, do you think there is more value in children making their own Valentines for classmates, friends and relatives, rather than using store-bought ones? I love the process. My kids do, too. Sometimes I second-guess myself that the stoore-bought ones would be preferred by other kids. I don't get too involved in the design, so they're not amazing creations yet. I think there's a benefit in them doing their own thing, but I guess I'm looking for a variety of perspectives. Again, I'm not talking about kids for whom writing out Valentines is torture. They'd love it either way, I'm sure. Dh and I would rather not introduce commercial products, but we also realize they live in a larger world. If we did store-bought cards (ever) we'd lean toward non-commercial or less-commercial ones. Anyway, just hoping to hear some thoughts.

[Biscuits & Gravy]

This will be our first year handing them out since DS is in preschool. We have not done anything for Valentines Day in the past, we really don't even acknowledge its existence in my house, but I'm sure they will at school. Having said that, I will not be purchasing cards for him to hand out. He loves doing crafts, so we will find something cute to make. I don't like the commercial aspect of Valentines Day, which is why we do not typically celebrate it.

[jillmamma]

I say, do whatever works for you! If you and your kids enjoy making them together, go for it! The thing that gets to me is when my kids are still working through Christmas candy and treats and get a huge amount of that sort of stuff again from school!

[One_Girl]

At school my dd doesn't actually care either way as long as there is candy, a sticker, or a pencil attached to the Valentine. I am not really sure that Valentine's day has a purpose, but I let my dd join in because she enjoys giving to her friends and I feel like it would be bad to just let her get stuff without giving.

At home we celebrate the day as a day to remember how much we love and care about each other. We do personalized cards for family and hand made gifts as well as chocolate for each other. Writing is torture for my dd so she draws a pretty picture and writes I love you and signs her name on her cards. I also buy the Valentine cards a long time before Valentines day so she can sign her name on them slowly over time.

[busymama77]

Originally Posted by One_Girl

At school my dd doesn't actually care either way as long as there is candy, a sticker, or a pencil attached to the Valentine. I am not really sure that Valentine's day has a purpose, but I let my dd join in because she enjoys giving to her friends and I feel like it would be bad to just let her get stuff without giving.

At home we celebrate the day as a day to remember how much we love and care about each other. We do personalized cards for family and hand made gifts as well as chocolate for each other. Writing is torture for my dd so she draws a pretty picture and writes I love you and signs her name on her cards. I also buy the Valentine cards a long time before Valentines day so she can sign her name on them slowly over time.

That's a good idea about buying the cards or even making the cards early so that they can sign them over time. DS is getting really good at writing his name now and loves to do it on bday cards and such that we buy for family members. I think we may start making those this week. Thanks, One_Girl!

[Storm Bride]

Originally Posted by jillmamma

I say, do whatever works for you! If you and your kids enjoy making them together, go for it!

This. DD1 is homeschooling. If she were doing valentines for anyone, I'd encourage her to make her own. (She'll probably make some for her neighbourhood friends, anyway.) She loves to draw, colour, etc. DS2 will probably do some for his preschool friends, and I'll honestly probably just buy some. He's nowhere near into it enough to craft 20 valentines, yk? It just wouldn't work for him. Hopefully, I can find some that aren't licensed products, but I'm not going to drive all over looking, either.

[Drummer's Wife]

eh, we made them last year and it was fun, but time consuming... not sure if we will buy them or make them this year, but we were the only ones that they exchanged with that made them. I don't care either way, and wouldn't give it much thought.

Oh, we were also one of the only ones that didn't attach or give out candy (or stickers/tatoos) with ours... so, this year, we will give include a little treat b/c I didn't realize this was the norm!

[crl]

I think there's value to making them at home, just because I think spending time on thoughtful cards/gifts for others is a good experience--assuming the kid involved enjoys it at least a little. But I really don't think the other kids care much, except as someone else mentioned they like attached treats.

I'm not thrilled about the attached treats thing for a variety of reasons, but we will be doing them for Valentine's Day. DS got goody bags/candy at Halloween and Christmas at school and we didn't hand out anything which made him sad, so we're planning to do a little bag (orange--for Chinese New Year, glow stick, pear bar).

DS is doing homemade valentines because he wanted to do Charlie Brown and we didn't find any pre-made Charlie Brown cards, so I ordered stickers and we'll make cards. I'll cut the paper and will probably write the "Happy Valentine's Day" on the cards and have him do the names (we have 44 kids to do between K and afterschool care).

Catherine

[limabean]

Last year DS didn't seem to show a preference for the homemade or storebought ones that he received from his classmates -- he just thought it was fun to exchange them in general.

[expecting-joy]

Thanks for your thoughts!

I always get them started mid January, as I can't stand to see kids rushed. This year my older dd has a list of nearly 40 people she wants to make Valentines for. Younger dd's list is nearly twenty and that's a lot for her.

I'm not really into the exchange of stuff. I don't mind pencils and stickers and playdoh in concept, it's just how it gets compulsorary and how we throw most things away. They always get a bunch of junky candy and commercial trinkets. I feel like we just did this for Christmas and Hannukah, KWIM?

Anyway, as to making the cards, I guess I'm trying to be sensitive to finding a middle ground when it becomes necessary. We want to uphold our values for our children, while letting them participate in school culture, and it's a fine line sometimes.

We also have a very tight budget, and I've discovered buying Valentines is cheaper, expecially if you pick them up at the after Valentines Day sales. I have done that the last two years, and have gotten 100 really cute ones for a couple dollars total. Buying doilies and stickers and cardstock definitely costs more, and they'd like to add glitter glue and sequins and, and, and...

Oh, well, thanks for letting me process it a bit. There's probably no obvious answer. For now, I think I need to support their desire to make them.

[Tigerchild]

If your kids truly enjoy it, then I think it's valuable.

If they don't...then I think that the store bought method is the more valuable one for class valentines, becuase I think getting into a fight and tears over 24 valentines that are realistically going to end up in the recycling can within a few days is stupid. I'd save the fight for something for grandma or someone who cares more.

And yes, before 10 people respond with "but my kid cares", yep, I'd say there's one or 2 in every class that prefer them--but most either just enjoy having a bag of valentines to look at or unfortunately couldn't care less about anything other than the treat.

THANK GOODNESS that my kids' teachers decided as a unit to have NO candy on the valentines this year, and their party will be focused on reading and looking at the valentines instead of getting hopped up on sugar, HFCS, and Red Dye # whatever). It's also going to be a short party (another thank god, at least for my two kids who tend to crash after high stimulus and who I then get stuck with driving home incredibly snappish crabcakes).

So we may end up doing cute homemade valentines this year. I think we're going to do a "base" card (that I can print out) and then each child decorates each one individually. My kids love to make cards...but not 24 of them from scratch. I think the could get into decorating 24 premade ones though, easily.

The goal is for EVERYONE to have fun. Including ME. So if everyone's on board with whatever you plan, then great! If it's going to be a huge pain in somebody's butt then I suggest working around until you find some way to do it that doesn't cause pain in anyone's rear end.