Making time for husband?

[Mirichka]

Okay, here goes: My now 16month old son goes to sleep with us around 10:30/11:00 and sleeps until about 8:00/8:30. He takes about two naps a day. We don't have a set schedule, but I am beginning to think our marriage may require me to start one. The thing is that when I try to put him to bed earlier, he wakes up shortly afterword and will only be placated with the breast or may be happy playing until we go to bed. He nurses to bed and to naps. My husband and I have not been out at all without ds, and I think the two of us are needing some alone time without ds. How can we do this gently? We have no family or close friends that I feel comfortable enough with leaving ds and none that ds is used to so it would be comfortable for him. Where do we start? Help! I am thinking if I can get ds to sleep predictably, maybe just having someone stay to watch him while he sleeps--even if its for brief time initially, that might be a step in the right direction.

[~Charlie's~Angel~]

If you want to do it gently, anything you try will have to be gradual. If you want to give him an earlier routine, that will also have to be gradual. Gradually get him to nap earlier and earlier, then he will want to go to bed earlier and earlier. Have you, or are you willing to try bottles of Breast milk so that if someone does watch him and he wakes, they can give him a bottle of mama milk?

[texmati]

I'm not sure about going out, but DH and I let ds sleep in the evening, while we get dinner and chat, knowing full well that it means that he will be up a few times during the night.

That's also how we go out to restaraunts. So... we never get a good nights sleep, but DH and I do get to hang out in the evenings. Our son is 4 months old.

[jecombs]

The short answer: your son is going to have to start getting up earlier, so he'll want to go to sleep earlier. Try waking him at 7:30 AM, instead of 8:00. After a week or two, he'll hopefully start adjusting his own bedtime to be a bit earlier. Around that age is also when my DD dropped back to just one nap a day. You might want to try waking him earlier from his 2nd nap, in the hope that he'll eventually drop it and be ready for bed earlier.
One piece of advice: my DD is always easier to put to bed during the winter months, because it gets dark so much earlier. So it will probably easier for your DS to start going to bed earlier now, as opposed to in the Spring/Summer.

[Mirichka]

I am loathe to wake a sleeping baby, but I think you might be onto something. Will try the waking him up a little earlier to push things earlier all around and let you know how that works. Thanks!

[KBean]

Originally Posted by texmati

I'm not sure about going out, but DH and I let ds sleep in the evening, while we get dinner and chat, knowing full well that it means that he will be up a few times during the night.

This is what we do too. We put our son down early in the evening so we have time together as a couple. We then have time to eat dinner, talk, watch movies, snuggle, etc.