Feeling dehumanized by the breast pump

[Nicole915]

I have a 7 week old daughter, and have just started to pump in order to allow my husband to participate in feeding her, and to supplement in the evening when I seem to have low supply.

Problem is that when I hook myself up to the pump, I feel really unhappy. I love nursing her, and I love the idea of my husband being able to participate more fully in her care while allowing me the peace of mind in case I'm away from her for some unexpected reason.

The pump I have is a Medela PIS, and it seems to do an okay job. I produce for the first 5 min of pumping, and then the milk just stops. Total production per pumping session is around 1oz. I know part of my angst is that I expected pumping to be more fruitful... but part is that I just feel dehumanized. Anyone else have this experience? Any wisdom to share?

[Sarah W]

Do you just sit and pump? I would read as well as pump. Maybe if you had a portable DVD player, you could watch a movie or home videos.

I would also pump one side, switch to the other, then come back to each side.

[zensven42]

Maybe don't pump then? I found that pumping for my second child was very difficult and time consuming, compared to my other children who never saw a bottle in their lives. Pumps do not do the job as well as a breast, and I believe babes really need their mama to do the job if they can. Although it is very sweet to try to do this for your husband, there are plenty of ways they can bond that do not involve feeding, just everyday stuff like carrying, changing diapers and clothing, bathing, and playing.

[ewe+lamb]

Personally if I was in your situation I wouldn't pump there are lots of other things that your partner can do to bond with the baby that doesn't impose on the mother's role of nursing her baby.

[NorthStarMom]

I agree with the PP's. Skip the pump for now. Maybe try it again in a month or two.
Baths with Dad are a big hit with our four week old. Find other ways for your DH to be involved.

[Mosaic]

I hear you... I was a WOHM, so not pumping wasn't an option for me. Being hooked up to an annoying machine when I'd much rather have a sweet, cuddly baby was extremely difficult for me as well, but there are a few things you can do to make it more bearable.

1) Go hands-free. Then you can read, type, do an impressive number of things, even play with your baby (heck, I've even changed a diaper while pumping, though I don't recommend it!) while pumping, and it becomes less of a chore, so you may produce more. Kellymom has great instructions on how to do this on the cheap (which I used for over a year), but there are also special bras you can get to help you out as well.

2) Keep pumping for a little while after the milk stops. Sometimes you will get a second let-down; and even if you don't, you will be signalling your body to produce more milk and getting it used to the pump.

3) Do whatever it takes to make it comfortable. Sit somewhere cozy, pop in something on tv, have a throw nearby in case you get chilly, and look at pictures of your baby or even snuggle one of her blankets. Anything that reminds you that you're doing this for her.

4) Also, I'm not sure when you're pumping, but that has a huge effect on how much milk you get. If you're pumping after a feeding session and getting an ounce, you have rock star breasts! That said, I know how frustrating it is to sit there and feel like you're not getting very far. Try pumping at different times of day. I found I got lots more milk in the morning and still had plenty to spare for DD's "breakfast." I'd also do a "dream feed" and then pump right before going to bed, and that made sleeping much more comfortable, which made the session worthwhile for me even if I didn't get a whole lot out.

[MeepyCat]

I find that I am much happier with pumping when I can manage not to pay attention to it. Get a hands free bra (or create one, or do the clever thing with rubber bands), and then get yourself a good book and try to ignore the machine.

But I also agree with PPs who say that there are other ways for dads to bond, and if pumping makes you unhappy and you don't really need to... don't. Dad can do bathtime, or special daddy snuggles, or a bedtime routine that's all his.

Finally, it sounds as though you're pumping in addition to feeding your daughter (rather than instead of, when you're away from her). That's not a situation in which you'll get a ton of pumped milk. An ounce or so a day can add up into a meaningful backup stash, but if you nurse and then pump, or fit in pumping sessions between nursing sessions, many women won't see a ton of production for the pump.

[Chryseis]

I agree with a lot of what the other posters said, go hands-free and do something relaxing. When I worked I used to use this time to read or play my Nintendo DS. It turned something that was a real chore into something I really enjoyed.

Another option would be to just get a single manual pump and pump on the side you're not feeding on once or twice a day. I used to do this first thing in the morning and it was extremely successful, one of my better pumping sessions of the day. I plan on using this method now that I'm a SAHM to build up a little freezer stash.

[hotharmony]

Being able to pump 1oz while nursing a new baby is great that is a huge amount to pump. According to KellyMom, most moms who are nursing full-time are able to pump around 1/2 to 2 ounces total (for both breasts) per pumping session.

Also I would bet that you don't have a low supply at night but that at 7 weeks is just the begining of night time fussiness. Many babies like to cluster feed and get fussy in the evenings and here is some great information on that.

[sahmmie]

I used to sit on my bed and watch tv while pumping. It was a treat to be able to watch something I like (TiVo is great for this!) which made pumping less of a chore.

Try pumping for an additional 2-5 minutes after the flow stops. Often times you will tap into some reserve milk which will also increase your supply so that you'll get more milk in future sessions which may encourage you as you see your output increase.

[smpayne]

Originally Posted by hotharmony

Being able to pump 1oz while nursing a new baby is great that is a huge amount to pump. According to KellyMom, most moms who are nursing full-time are able to pump around 1/2 to 2 ounces total (for both breasts) per pumping session.

Also I would bet that you don't have a low supply at night but that at 7 weeks is just the begining of night time fussiness. Many babies like to cluster feed and get fussy in the evenings and here is some great information on that.

1 oz in 5min and nursing full time, WOW! At about 7 weeks, I was getting maybe 4 oz after 1/2hr of double pumping, and that was only because I was at work and was missing feedings. I was lucky to get 1/2oz per session when I was nursing full time.

I mostly pumped at work in a nice quiet place, turned on the tunes and actually found it relaxing. I thought it was cool that my body could do this and found it interesting to watch as the bottles filled.

[Nicole915]

Thanks so much for the support and replies.

I should have been more thourough in my post. Part of the reason for the pumping and supplementing her with the BM is that she has had very slow weight gain. She took a month to get back to birth weight, and is still gaining slowly. The options at this point for her are formula, expressed breast milk or doing some testing to try to figure out what the issue is. Pumping seems to be the least of all these evils, so I'll of course stick with it. I was just feeling like a big hunk o meat with the pump hooked up to me, and was wondering if that is a common response.

I'll work on getting myself a hands free set up, that is a great suggestion. What I do now is reading or surfing the internet while pumping, so I am distracted (as much as one can be) by the process.

Thanks all of you for the kindness and support.

[Bokonon]

Originally Posted by Nicole915

Thanks so much for the support and replies.

I should have been more thourough in my post. Part of the reason for the pumping and supplementing her with the BM is that she has had very slow weight gain. She took a month to get back to birth weight, and is still gaining slowly. The options at this point for her are formula, expressed breast milk or doing some testing to try to figure out what the issue is. Pumping seems to be the least of all these evils, so I'll of course stick with it. I was just feeling like a big hunk o meat with the pump hooked up to me, and was wondering if that is a common response.

I'll work on getting myself a hands free set up, that is a great suggestion. What I do now is reading or surfing the internet while pumping, so I am distracted (as much as one can be) by the process.

Thanks all of you for the kindness and support.

Can you post some more information about her slow weight gain? Maybe we could help you with some suggestions.

What was her birth weight, lowest weight, etc. Were you given IV fluids prior to birth? That can artificially inflate birth weight so it looks like the loss is greater than it would have been otherwise (for example, my baby's birth weight was 4 lbs. 8 oz., and she dropped down to 3 lbs. 11 oz. while on IV fluids and TPN, because I was on an IV for a week before delivery).

Has she been evaluated for tongue tie? Have you seen a certified lactation consultant?

Please forgive me if I am being too nosy!

[Megan73]

I understand how you feel, Nicole. I pumped after every feed for my son's first five months to boost my low supply.
Have you considered trying domperidone? It's a drug that has the side-effect of increasing prolactin levels and thus increasing milk supply. It might bump up your supply with less pumping.
The other thing I'd suggest is using an at-the-breast supplementer such as the Medela SNS or Lact-Aid instead of bottles. There are lots of other ways that dad can care for baby - my DH is the bath man, for example.
I still pump once a day at work (I went back when my LO was a year old) and it's much better than pumping in those early days because I feel good that I'm doing something for him while we're apart. So don't despair - pumping won't always feels this bad.

[redorchid]

Have you tried expressing by hand? Some moms can get pretty efficient at it. I imagine doing it yourself might be less dehumanizing than a machine.

I agree about sharing more on her slow weight gain. Many growth charts are based on artificially fed babies and those babies have a different growth pattern. Other than numbers, does she seem unhealthy to you?

Nursing from directly from the breast will get more milk into your baby faster than pumping. If your daughter is on any kind of schedule, toss it and nurse whenever she wants it. Also keep yourself well hydrated, as rested as you can manage and if you really think you have low supply there are herbs to try.

[Nicole915]

You guys are the best. So here's the short version of her challenges so far.

Pregnancy was uneventful.

Water broke 12/2. Induced labor via trans vaginal medication. 12/3 - Dialated quickly to 10cm, she was stable and doing well. Pushed for 3 hours... no progress due to her head being tilted and the midwife determined that we needed to consider a c-section. Pushed for 2 more hours. We know now that she was a big baby. I was on some IV fluids, but they were rather conservative (2x maint). C-section on 12/3 @10:30. Birth weight 9lbs 13.5oz

Due to meconium she was suctioned and evaluated in the NICU. Was able to put her to breast 2 hours later. She recieved 30ml of formula via NG tube in the NICU. Her latch was fantastic, she has a very strong suck.

Didn't recieve very good nursing coaching while in recovery. At discharge from the hospital on 12/6 she was down to 8lbs 5oz. They sent us home with the SNS and we supplemented 10ml three times daily for one week, then went to exclusive breast feeding.

At 1.5 weeks had a lactation specialist from the hospital visit in home. Was a terrible experience, she brought formula with her. We asked her to leave. After that, went to LLL meetings and back to the midwife. They confirmed her latch was appropriate. No tongue tie. If anything, she's a good nurser.

At 2 weeks she was 9lbs 4oz, they wanted us to supplement formula via the SNS up to twice daily with 30mls. That seemed like a path to losing bfing, so we just ramped up feeding to once every hour. Started fenugreek, teas and oatmeal.

By 4 weeks she was finally back to her birth weight.

At 6 weeks she is now 10lbs 12.5oz, which is close to the 1 oz a day 'goal'. She is fed on demand, the schedule seemed insane, and so we never did it. She often feeds more often than every 2 hours anyway.

She sleeps well, and that is where the pumping comes in. When I wake her to feed, she just ends up a mess of cranky baby, and the nursing isn't very fruitful. Instead of waking her, I wake up to pump. We use that milk (I usually get about 1 oz) to feed her in the evening. During the evening when she is doing her clusterfeeding thing, she isn't getting fluid. She sucks, but there isn't a swallow or pause. She gets frustrated, vocalizes, flings her arms around and sucks more rapidly, but to no avail. That is when we feed her the BM via slow flow nipple bottle.

I know that is a lot of info. Sorry for writing a novel, and again thanks so much.

[Bokonon]

Is the 1 oz. per day goal being set by your doctor? The average breastfed baby gains 4-7 oz. per week, so an ounce a day is on the high side of that. It should be more important for her to gain at a normal, healthy rate rather than "catch up" to what the doc thinks she should weigh.

15 oz. in 2 weeks is wonderful! If you weren't supplementing during that time, I certainly wouldn't think you should start now instead of continuing to feed on demand, and watching wet and dirty diapers. There should be at least 5 very wet diapers per day. If it's not going in, it can't come out!

For the cluster feeding, I would recommend doing a lot of skin-to-skin feeding during those times, and just let her feed as long as possible, switching breasts frequently if necessary. I have a huge supply and still had to switch breasts several times during the 6-week growth spurt cluster feeding because Peepers would get fussy. If you are supplementing with pumped milk at that time, you need to pump when you do so, or your body doesn't know to make that much more milk.

And way to go for kicking out the LC who came with formula!!! That just boggles my mind that anyone trying to encourage breastfeeding would bring formula to a new struggling mom!

Honestly it sounds like you are doing awesome. The weight gain in the beginning was slow, but she had to overcome a challenging start with the meconium and c-section. But 15 oz. in 2 weeks is better than good!

[cristeen]

TBH, some of your feeding troubles sound like what I went through with my little guy. Is your MW an IBCLC? I would highly recommend finding one if not. My MW looked at my little guy's latch and pronounced it good all along. It wasn't until after he was on formula, was refusing the breast and I had dried up that I hired an IBCLC and she took one look at him and discovered that he was tied. At this point I'm attempting relactation and he's on donor milk... it's been a long 4 months. But because my milk dried up completely I will likely never be able to handle all of his milk needs. I highly recommend you avoid that route if at all possible.

Have you tried taking pre and post-feeding weights? WIth IV fluids, I wouldn't be concerned about the massive weight loss in the first couple days... that's to be expected. So if you discount that and consider the fact that she is gaining steadily albeit slowly since you came home, then you want to look at the other indicators to determine whether or not you actually have a problem.

One thing that you need to remember is that pumping so that daddy can give her a bottle and supplementing her with a bottle both will contribute to a decrease in your milk supply. A pump will never be as efficient at removing milk from the breast as the baby, so even if you're pumping it can cause a decrease. I would recommend looking into a supplementer you can use at the breast like a Medela SNS or a Lact-Aid, and instead of replacing a feeding with a pumping, try pumping one side while nursing the other. Daddy can find other ways of bonding with baby - letting him give her a bottle right now is not worth the damage to your supply.

[sunshynbaby]

Originally Posted by zensven42

Maybe don't pump then? I found that pumping for my second child was very difficult and time consuming, compared to my other children who never saw a bottle in their lives. Pumps do not do the job as well as a breast, and I believe babes really need their mama to do the job if they can. Although it is very sweet to try to do this for your husband, there are plenty of ways they can bond that do not involve feeding, just everyday stuff like carrying, changing diapers and clothing, bathing, and playing.

This. I pump because I work. I would not pump if I didn't have to.

Aside from that, one ounce is good output. You shouldn't need to pump to supplement for the evenings. Just nurse, nurse, nurse and your body will get the message that you need more milk to keep up with your LO.

[sunshynbaby]

Sorry I didn't read your other replies before I replied. Have you tried fenugreek and/or oatmeal to ramp up your supply? This might be helpful: http://www.kellymom.com/bf/supply/low-supply.html