Question for Mamas in Tucson?

[Xavismom]

DH is trying to convince me that we should move to Tucson. I've never been there so I have no idea what its like at all.

For anyone who lives there now, or has, do you like it? Dislike it?

I've spent my entire life in Salt Lake City, and I'll admit the idea of moving terrifies me. We would be moving because DH would have a job opportunity there that is better than what he has here. He has a friend (that I've never met) that lives there.

DH has been trying to convince me to do this already for over a year. We'll be getting a large chunk of money sometime this year, so he thinks thats the perfect excuse/opportunity for us to move. But I'm very nervous.

[TeaJunkie]

I was in your shoes almost five years ago now! I had lived in California my whole life when DH and I decided to leave (for a job) so that we could afford to buy a house (we were living in the L.A. area). Like you, I didn't know anyone in Tucson but DH had a few friends here.

I like Tucson. The weather is terrific 9-10 months out of the year. It's not too big. Houses are affordable. There are some fun things to do with children (Desert Museum, a Zoo, Children's Museum, etc.). Overall, the people are pretty nice.

All that said, it has been hard on me. After living in CA my whole life, I miss lush green grass and big green trees (I grew up in Northern CA!). What I miss most, however are my friends and family. The hardest thing is that my sister has a daughter only six weeks older than DS. We were close before we had kids, but now I want to live near her so much more than before for DS's sake. He has no other cousins. It is hard to not have any family in town. We have no one to call that could take care of DS for a couple hours so we can go out to dinner.

I am not trying to discourage you or say that your experience will be like mine, just sharing what it's been like for me. I wish you the best of luck in whatever you decide. If you have any specific questions, feel free to PM me!

[SundayCrepes]

Tucson is a sprawling city that feels like a small town. I've lived here most of the last 30 years. Wow! I hadn't realized it's been that long.

Tucson tends towards liberal views in a conservative state. There are lots of rich people and lots of not so rich. Much of the town is service industry so not real high wages. For 2 or 3 years we had the number 1 ranking for personal thefts.

There is a birth center in town and a couple midwives that do homebirths. There are several homeschooling groups. I'm not sure what the arts scene is any more, though it was once pretty good for a city this size.

Because I've lived here so long, I had my old established friends. When I gave birth at 43, I suddenly had to find friends with young children. I've met lots of great folk, but this is a transient town and many have since moved away.

I like the climate. The summers are HOT, but the monsoons (when they happen) are so wonderfully violent that it makes it worth the summer heat. The winters aren't too bad. There's little other seasonal change. I like the wide open spaces and the ability to see forever over the sparse foliage. People who come here wanting to plant grass and non-native trees and flowers should just stay where they are. We don't have the water to waste on such foreign plants.

We're a city that's getting too big. I fear someday we may merge with Phoenix. (Can't stand Phoenix and can't stand that much suburbia.)

We have a food co-op and Trader Joe's. We were involved with the co-ops city chicken coop tour. Lots of friendly people looking at raising backyard chickens. It's that kind of city.

[sarahtdubb]

hi Xavismom!

I grew up in Tucson and moved back here about 1.5 years ago. I moved back to be close to family and thought I'd spend a year here and skedaddle, but I really like it!

Tucson is a sprawling place, but it feels kinda small. My husband and I are always talking about how small it feels here--we run into the same people all the time and have developed a real sense of community. I have met a lot of like-minded parents and I find tucson to be really kid friendly (this is said after living 9 years in Washington, DC, where children over 6 months old are very rare to see! ).

A huge part of my quality of life here is where we live-- we decided to be close to the university and downtown because there is a lot of stuff around here we can walk and bike to. Because tucson sprawls, it is easy to end up spending a lot of time in your car, but it's also easy to avoid if you're conscious about where you live (I haven't used my car for 4 days, and I'm 9 months pregnant! ).

My husband is from the east coast and he missed cold weather and trees, and I don't blame him. But Tucson has a lot to offer!

I assume you'll visit before making any big decisions? Let us know if you want ideas of places to check out when you're here.

[Serendipity]

Hello!

I don't have much to add, these ladies have you covered. I was born and raised here and I've never lived anywhere else so I have nothing to compare it to but I love Tucson!

[sarahsmothering]

TeaJunkie's post could have been mine, EXACTLY - from the time line (five years ago), to the reason (DH job), to the missing the lushness of home (only exception there is I was from the north east.)

It is hard to raise kids w/o family. But it also gives you the opportunity to grow stronger, become more resourceful, and meet more people. One added perk of moving away was the decrease in stress, as my family could (and still can) sometimes do that to me. The miles in between were an unexpected buffer for my nerves

I would move back closer to family in a heartbeat, but in the meantime, this is home. And the friends we've made in Tucson have become like family.

[Xavismom]

Thanks everyone for taking the time to reply! You answered a lot of things I was wondering about, like the 'feel' of the place, kid friendly or not, etc.

So if there is a birthcenter and homeschooling groups, is this area sort of crunchy then? Because that would be really great. I get SO tired of feeling like the outsider sometimes, KWIM?

I dont think I would miss the green too terribly. Its green in Salt Lake, but most of Utah is desert too, and I have always loved southern UT, and go south as often as I can. I absolutely hate the winter here, and snow. I think I would really miss spring and fall though.

The main thing holding me back (other than never moving before) is my Mom. We are super super close, and I am her only child, and DS is the grandbaby she's been waiting 10 years for. I'm not sure I could handle not having my mom close to me, and it would break my heart for DS not to have his grandma around. I am a little afraid of what it might do to my mom emotionally if we leave and I am gone and DS is gone.

DH gets REALLY mad at me whenever I bring this up, and tells me I am selfish for not wanting to move bc of my mom He didnt have a mom growing up, and his dad is now passed away too, he doesnt understand family attachment like I have with my mom. I was hoping he would 'get it' after DS was born, but he doesnt.

I would like to experience something new, and I know the air here is not good for me, or DS. I know there are a lot of reasons to move, and only one not too. How hard is it REALLY to be away from family you love dearly? I cant talk to DH about that anymore, because he gets so mad and tries to guilt me.

[Knitting Mama]

Just some food for thought on that: A friend of mine moved here in 2000. She missed her family back in Iowa desperately, but it was so much better here for her husband, work-wise. After a year or two of spending far too much money to go back to Iowa and to have family come here, her parents took the plunge-- they moved here as well. After they moved her, my friend's sister did the same. Everyone is so happy now; they are such a close knit family, it was far too rough on them to be apart. I don't know if a similar situation is at all possible for you, but I wanted to tell you about their solution anyway.

[Xavismom]

Originally Posted by Cecilia's Mama

Just some food for thought on that: A friend of mine moved here in 2000. She missed her family back in Iowa desperately, but it was so much better here for her husband, work-wise. After a year or two of spending far too much money to go back to Iowa and to have family come here, her parents took the plunge-- they moved here as well. After they moved her, my friend's sister did the same. Everyone is so happy now; they are such a close knit family, it was far too rough on them to be apart. I don't know if a similar situation is at all possible for you, but I wanted to tell you about their solution anyway.

I've already asked my mom to move with us

She kind of hedges around the issue, saying things like, she's too old and close to retirement to look for a new job in a new city, and that she cant leave Salt Lake because of HER mother. Which I get, my grandma has dementia and is in a care center, and my mom and her youngest brother are the ONLY ONES out of 9 siblings that go to visit her

DH says he feels confident that when my grandma passes, my mom would move because she would not be able to stand being away from me and DS. But I feel like thats a gamble!

Another question I thought of.... if anyone might possibly know this??

I'm currently a SAHM, and plan on staying that way. However I do plan to occasionally go into my old job, and take appointments with my favorite clients, I'm a massage therapist.

Salt Lake is suprisingly pretty saturated with Spas, and people that want to get regular massage, how is it in Tucson? Is it a common thing there, if I needed to get a very part time job down there?

Thanks, you all are so nice to help me out with this!

[SundayCrepes]

Tucson has a massage school--however that info may help you.

[desertgirl01]

I've lived in Tucson forever...well, it seems like forever. To me, it seems like a huge, sprawling city, but I think that's because I seem to remember what is was like 25 years ago (although I was a kid then, my radius of life around town was much smaller). Well, like everyone else said, it is definitely sprawling, though i'm not sure Tucson qualifies as HUGE. I definitely echo that there is a small town feel; lots of random circles of connection.

Massage therapist--there are alot of resorts here that have spas. Many of the salons have spa services as well.

Crunchy? I'm not the best person to ask since I'm not very crunchy, just a little! But yeah, I'd say you can definitely find crunchy communities here!

I hear you about leaving family. Besides loving the desert, my family ties have pulled me back everytime I leave! I hope your mom can make it out here--I'm not sure if this would appeal to here, there are a ton of retirement communities here.

[Xavismom]

Well, I guess we are going to make a trip down to Tucson in the spring, and check it out.

Any suggestions on areas we should drive around, check out? Where to go /what to do to get a good feel of the place?

Thanks Mamas!

[SundayCrepes]

You should try the Mexican food on 4th Ave around 29th street.

There are historic neighborhoods around the university.

The Arizona Sonora Desert Museum on the west side of Tucson is pretty famous. You'll learn a lot about the desert there.

Sabino Canyon is pretty popular.

4th Ave around 6th street is a community area. I think Native Seed Search still has an office there. The food co-op is there. Antigone's women's bookshop. Some fun restaurants. I like Maya Quetzal, Caruso's and La Indita. The chocolate iguana has coffee, scones, candies, and a few other baked goods. World Wide Wrappers has good wraps and smoothies.

There's a children's museum on 6th ave south of downtown.

Bookman's used books could be fun. Several locations.

Govinda's is a vegetarian restaurant. Some religious affiliation, I'm not sure which.

The Blue Willow on Campbell is an old house turned restaurant. I love their tofu scramble for breakfast.

South of town on I-19 is San Xavier Mission. Really old history there. Haven't been there in years. However, get either indian fry bread or an indian taco (a fry bread with beans and taco stuff) while you're there.

[Xavismom]

Thanks!! Nice to know there are some good vegatarian places, as DH & I dont eat meat.

We will definately check some of those out. Is there a Zoo or anything in Tucson or close by?

[Knitting Mama]

There's the Reid Park Zoo, but for my money, I'd choose the Arizona-Sonora Desert Museum that SundayCrepes talked about over the zoo any day. It's got really cool habitats that are large and open looking, like Cat Canyon, and a bunch of fun other attractions. It's all outdoors and definitely not a typical museum.

[sarahtdubb]

Originally Posted by Cecilia's Mama

There's the Reid Park Zoo, but for my money, I'd choose the Arizona-Sonora Desert Museum that SundayCrepes talked about over the zoo any day. It's got really cool habitats that are large and open looking, like Cat Canyon, and a bunch of fun other attractions. It's all outdoors and definitely not a typical museum.

This also depends on the age of your kids.... we LOVE the zoo. It is right in the middle of town, next to a great park with lots of playgrounds, etc., and is really good for little kids. My son is 2 1/2 and while I adore the Desert Museum, he's just a little young for it now. The habitats are very natural, which is great, but it is hard for my little guy to see the animals, and the place is really big, so he tires out quickly. He is able to walk around the whole zoo on his own and is a really easy and fun place for us to spend time.

Definitely check out 4th avenue, lots of fun crunchy stuff going on there. We are there a lot hanging out and eating yogurt in front of the food co-op!

[Xavismom]

Ok I am getting a little excited to go check everything out now, thanks so much Mamas!