Pacifier use with twins

[nummies]

With my singleton, I didn't really see the need for pacifiers, so we didn't. However, with these twins, I just don't see how I can go on without them. Each night is more horrifying than the last as far as sleeping and nursing goes. Each twin wants to suck but doesn't really want milk, so they are literally on the breast all night long.

What are your thoughts on using pacifiers at this point? Any ideas for me?

[DeerMother]

As i recall, you are successful w/ bf this far. Don't beat yourself up about the use of a pacifier, swing, bouncy seat etc. Do what gentle things you need to do to get a little sleep. It may be different than how you mothered your singleton, but it is a different game at this point.

[attached2mason]

Perhaps you could weigh the pros and cons of pacificer use vs. not using them and decide which issues on either side create the most problem. For example:

Using pacifiers:
- potentially limits time at the breast too much, increasing chance of supply issues
- potentially alters suck patterns and interferes with breastfeeding
- potentially shortens the nursing relationship in the long run
- potentially helps you manage two babies, getting you more sleep and helping you function better
-potentially a tool to keep one baby happy at times you can't tend to both at once

Not using pacifiers:
- all sucking occurs at the breast, likely resulting in a better/more established supply, nothing to interfere with suck
- no need to keep track of paci's, no habit to break later
- in the end you may find that a paci didn't really reduce the burden as much as you'd hoped.

Overall . . . there are a number of factors to consider. How confident are you that, should bf'ing problems arise as a result, you are able to rectify them and have adequate support to do so? If they do cause problems will that end up being more work than the paci help was worth? If you choose not to use paci's or some other method to ease the night stuff do you feel that your parenting and health will suffer?

I hope I'm not coming off as having an opinion on one side or the other because I really don't have one. These are just things I bring up with moms I work with as a LLL leader to help them make an informed decision. In the end, you are the mommy and if you think that introducing a paci is necessary at this point then I say go for it - but just go for it with open eyes as to the potential drawbacks. If (when ) I am in your shoes I may opt to use them myself.

Something to ponder . . .if you introduced them now, what is the likelihood that you could stop using them in a few months when things feel more manageable? I didn't use them with Mason so I have no clue about that, but if it were possible to use them for just a short time then that might be a nice in between, dunno.

Hang in there mama . I hope you find a solution to help you and the babies have more restful nights.

[MaterBum]

First, congratulations on the birth of your twins!

If I'm reading your siggy right, your twins are at most just a few weeks old, right? I remember how hard and exhausting those first few months were!

I think the pp gave you a lot of great pro/con ideas to sort out. I just wanted to chime in to say that I understand the temptation. I was there. I even bought a couple and had them in the house. But I told myself that I was going to try other things first.

What ended up working for us in those early months was little portable baby swings. My bed was on the floor for co-sleeping, so the little, low swings were easy for me to sit by the bed and reach in and out. I discovered that I could nurse one twin, put him/her in the swing and then cuddle/nurse the other in bed until it was time to switch again. We went through a lot of batteries, but it was so worth it.

So I guess that's my advice. It seems you have some reservation about using pacifiers, otherwise you'd just do it. So, on that assumption, I'd suggest you try other things first. And I want to just re-assure you that they will NOT nurse this much all night forever. It really will ease up. I promise!

[dividedsky]

just a quick post, babes are napping and i'm stinky and need shower

one of my boys liked the paci early on, and then kicked the habit himself at like 3mos. the other never liked it.

the one who did take it... it wasn't necessarily that great honestly. i was awake just the same to pop the thing into his mouth when it fell out. and i always had the feeling that he might as well be nursing if i'm waking up anyway... for the extra couple of calories or whatever.

that being said, if it works for you, do it!! whatever gets you through the night! don't feel guilty about using any sort of prop. you have TWINS. the amount of work/stress in the first 3mos especially is absurd. anything to alleviate it that keeps mom and babes happy is OK in my book!

[sahmmie]

One of the downsides to using a pacifier for sleep is that the darn thing falls out once the baby is in a deep sleep and then you have a baby who wakes up crying multiple times each night because they can't get back to sleep without it. I had three pacifier addicts and it was no picnic.

[mom_of_steele]

I say...do what you gotta do. I was against pacifiers when my daughter was first born, but then when she was so sick all the time, re-hospitalized, poked and prodded...I wanted her to be able to have something to comfort her when I couldn't. Honestly it caused NO problems with nursing and supply issues and she wasn't even all that attached to it by the age of one. Both my boys have pacifiers (one of them is a wee bit more attached to it than the other however). I don't have any supply issues...and the thing is, when they are hungry...the pacifier won't do it for them anyway. Some babies just like the suck to help sooth themselves. I figure...what's the difference between the breast or a pacifier...either way, they aren't self-soothing. Which is okay during the months when you need sleep to be able to "get it together" again. Then you can work on helping them sooth themselves later. I usually try to get them to fall asleep without it in their mouth, and then they don't need it as much throughout the night. Go for it...

[SuzyQ2+2]

Oh mama, I was *SO* there at almost exactly the same age (might have been a week or two later). I never used a paci with either of my singletons...tried it with the first in desperation but she spit it halfway across the room and well, that was the end of that! Didn't try it at all with my 2nd...quite frankly I find babies look much cuter when you can see their whole face But really, I have no issue with them, they just didn't work for us and we learned to live without them.

Then we had twins! Yes, sent my dh out at 10:00 pm one night for paci's...he came home with a bagful, dutifully boiled them up...and our babies spit them halfway across the room I tried for about a week and then gave up. My nipples were KILLING me. It was just so hard to get the latch all right in the night with 2 of them, particularly trying to get them both down at the beginning of the night. Eventually they found their thumbs (around 3 months) and have been pretty happy ever since.

We also did use a swing/bouncy chair for one while I fed the other (during the day mostly) as I found I could really get them better latched individually...and they wound up on totally different 'schedules' anyhow, which was fine by me. We've actually just returned to the tandem thing as they are both pretty desperate when I get home from work...now it's like a circus act

You will find that things are definitely different with twins, and it will take a little while to find your groove...but you'll get there mama

[Red Pajama]

We used pacifiers with the twins. We used ones designed to "mimic the breast" to minimize nipple confusion. There were no complications, and it helped with the 'want to suck but not milk' thing. It also helped in the car.
At night, when one lost a pacifier, it wasn't fun. However, at about 4 months one preferred his thumb, and at about 6 months we lost the last pacifier and never replaced it.

With my singleton, I also introduced a pacifier around 3 weeks. Same brand as before. At about 3 months, we went through a really rough patch where she did not want to nurse, and she'd never had a bottle. She'd have to suck on the pacifier until almost asleep, when I"d swith my nipple for the pacifier. It went on for about 2 weeks, and was awful.

Two very different stories. Recoginze that the pacifier can give you some relief, but it can be quite a burden, too.

[~bookcase~]

Originally Posted by dividedsky

gets you through the night! don't feel guilty about using any sort of prop. you have TWINS. the amount of work/stress in the first 3mos especially is absurd.

Originally Posted by Red Pajama

Recoginze that the pacifier can give you some relief, but it can be quite a burden, too.

and this!

i used them from 5 months and would be really cautious to use them in the first 6 weeks when it's all about getting your short and long term supply established. if you go for it try to limit it to when you 'have' to break, like for eating/toilet etc
pacis are better than top ups/ some other devices to try and give you more sleep

mine quit them at 10 months - at the same time!? - and it was AWFUL!!!!!!!
but now i'm glad we only used them 5 months

[Intertwined]

I flat out begged Ben and Claire to take a paci. Only Claire took it and only for a very short time. It did buy me some scream free time in the car and also about 15 minutes to nurse Ben on days that I just. did. not. want. to. tandem. AGAIN

In my favor:

Full term twins with no nursing/suck issues
I'd nursed two babies before so I was on the lookout for the potential problems
I rarely if ever used the paci as a sub for the breast. More like a "give mommy 10 minutes to do something and THEN you can have my boob"

More important is learning to nurse those sweet boys laying DOWN. That will save your life in the end, Mama. I remember VIVIDLY those first weeks. I am pretty sure I didn't sleep for the first 6 weeks of their life--just dozed when I could. Try like heck to take care of yourself as much as you possibly can. But don't lay on the guilt. If they'll take em and it helps then go for it and just watch them closely for suck problems.

ETA: Oh and I meant to say Tammy, I did the same thing. When my twins were little I hated to tandem and did it as little as possible. Right around a year we went back to it and now, of course, at 20 months one is NOT allowed to nurse without the other or all heck breaks loose.

[nummies]

Thanks all. I am going to try to stick it out and see if we can make it without.

Originally Posted by Intertwined

More important is learning to nurse those sweet boys laying DOWN. That will save your life in the end, Mama. I remember VIVIDLY those first weeks. I am pretty sure I didn't sleep for the first 6 weeks of their life--just dozed when I could. Try like heck to take care of yourself as much as you possibly can. But don't lay on the guilt. If they'll take em and it helps then go for it and just watch them closely for suck problems.

I would love to figure out how to nurse them both at the same time while lying down. I just can't get it!

[dividedsky]

^^i used to put 100000 pillows behind me, then lay down as much as possible (a pillow under the tailbone was good, too) and nurse them that way on the ez2nurse pillow. have you tried that? it's not as good as nursing one laying on your side, but it works + bought me much sleep when i was desperate for it in the beginning.

[Beanjeepin]

My husband wanted the twins to take a pacifier. I think he thought it'd be easier for him when he was "in charge" (happens really rarely). My oldest never would despite my begging him to at 2 months old when we were packing/moving. The next child did take one, and was addicted - to a brand that was discontinued. Had he taken another kind or not lost them all I'm not sure at almost four that he'd be weaned from them. He HATED getting milk when comfort nursing and never got the hang of not getting milk and would scream and scream... I feel the pacifier saved all our sanity with him!

We introduced the pacifier when I was in a wedding and the babies were 3 weeks old. I was doing a reading and DH was terrified the babies would cry (our olders were in the wedding too, so he was reponsible for all for a few minutes). We learned they'd take it if we held it in, but it would immediately come out if we weren't holding it. It's had use in the car when they're upset, but nothing other than that - and at four months we still have to hold it in for them. I don't use them except for the car and don't encourage my older boys to run for them if a baby is crying. DH is home less than an hour a day when babies are awake/playing so I really don't care what he does/doesn't do with pacifiers.