DS is almost 6 months old and is not able to put himself back to sleep when he wakes up. And he wakes up quite a lot, often after every sleep cycle -- so every hour or so. (Although some nights he does much better, sleeping 3 hour stretches -- especially when he's swaddled, and sometimes white noise helps too.)
He goes to sleep very easily, and when he starts to stir in the middle of the night or during a nap, I simply have to give him his pacifier or sometimes nurse him a bit to get him to fall back asleep. So it's not too bad.
This is not a huge problem for me. I am taking a year off school and don't have any other kids, so I can catch up on sleep when he naps or whatever else. I also have no problem falling back asleep in the middle of the night. I honestly don't feel sleep-deprived and I'm very grateful for that.
However, I would love to know that he will, at some point, be able to put himself back to sleep. I have to admit, I get a little spooked by reading posts on this forum about parents with children who are 12+ months old still showing this behavior. I will be returning to school when he is 11 months old, and at that point sleep will very much be at a premium for me. Plus, I always hear about 6 months being sort of the "crossroads" for sleep -- when habits, good or bad, are somewhat solidified. I don't know how true that is, but I do worry that things will be harder to "fix" at 11 months than they may be right now (and I realize that this mentality that anything is actually "broken" is a very Western concept).
So I googled "teach baby to self-soothe" and I never realized that "self-soothe" meant "cry themselves to sleep." I never let DS cry -- like I said, I don't feel the need to do it. I just figured that he would grow old enough to be able to go back to sleep on his own without any major intervention from me or doing anything dramatic like CIO. Am I naive to believe this?
So I'm trying to think of ways I can help him learn to "self-soothe" that don't involve crying ...
** He still sleeps with a pacifier, and often all he needs is to have that placed in his mouth and he'll fall back asleep. He's working on learning how to put it back in his own mouth, but the orientation is kind of tricky, and in the middle of the night he often wakes himself up fully while trying to put the pacifier in his mouth. Would it be beneficial to try to wean him from the pacifier at this point? Or will he eventually learn to do it himself, and would that even help with the nighttime wakings?
**I've also tried introducing a lovey, but like the pacifier, it often just ends up waking him up as he plays with it and tries to put it in his mouth, etc.
**I've also toyed with the idea of putting a bottle of water in the crib with him, because I often feel he wants to nurse from being thirsty rather than hungry (our room is very dry during the winter despite a humidifier).
**Right now our sleep arrangement is such that he naps on our bed, usually with me right next to him. He also falls asleep for the night on our bed, and I move him to the crib set next to our bed for about 4-6 hours in the middle of the night, then bring him back into bed with me for an hour or two in the morning. I love co-sleeping, but for various reasons (this post is already too long) I don't think we can do it full time. So are we doing him a disservice with this arrangement and should I put more emphasis on having him fall asleep in the crib -- and perhaps move him to his own room? (Obviously I wouldn't do it if he has a hard time with it, but sometimes I feel like the co-sleeping is just for my benefit, and he would do fine sleeping on his own ...)
Anyway, sorry this post is so long. I guess I'm just looking for some direction with my nighttime parenting here. He is such a sweet kid who goes to sleep and wakes up smiling. I hesitate to think his sleeping is a "problem" at all, other than I worry about what the future holds. (Next year, DH will be the full-time stay at home parent, so he will be the one to inherit whatever issues manifest.) Basically what I want is a crystal ball or some very experienced mamas to tell me whether I should be doing anything at all at this stage to help him develop the ability to fall asleep by himself, or if I should let nature take its course and just deal with what comes my way.
He goes to sleep very easily, and when he starts to stir in the middle of the night or during a nap, I simply have to give him his pacifier or sometimes nurse him a bit to get him to fall back asleep. So it's not too bad.
This is not a huge problem for me. I am taking a year off school and don't have any other kids, so I can catch up on sleep when he naps or whatever else. I also have no problem falling back asleep in the middle of the night. I honestly don't feel sleep-deprived and I'm very grateful for that.
However, I would love to know that he will, at some point, be able to put himself back to sleep. I have to admit, I get a little spooked by reading posts on this forum about parents with children who are 12+ months old still showing this behavior. I will be returning to school when he is 11 months old, and at that point sleep will very much be at a premium for me. Plus, I always hear about 6 months being sort of the "crossroads" for sleep -- when habits, good or bad, are somewhat solidified. I don't know how true that is, but I do worry that things will be harder to "fix" at 11 months than they may be right now (and I realize that this mentality that anything is actually "broken" is a very Western concept).
So I googled "teach baby to self-soothe" and I never realized that "self-soothe" meant "cry themselves to sleep." I never let DS cry -- like I said, I don't feel the need to do it. I just figured that he would grow old enough to be able to go back to sleep on his own without any major intervention from me or doing anything dramatic like CIO. Am I naive to believe this?
So I'm trying to think of ways I can help him learn to "self-soothe" that don't involve crying ...
** He still sleeps with a pacifier, and often all he needs is to have that placed in his mouth and he'll fall back asleep. He's working on learning how to put it back in his own mouth, but the orientation is kind of tricky, and in the middle of the night he often wakes himself up fully while trying to put the pacifier in his mouth. Would it be beneficial to try to wean him from the pacifier at this point? Or will he eventually learn to do it himself, and would that even help with the nighttime wakings?
**I've also tried introducing a lovey, but like the pacifier, it often just ends up waking him up as he plays with it and tries to put it in his mouth, etc.
**I've also toyed with the idea of putting a bottle of water in the crib with him, because I often feel he wants to nurse from being thirsty rather than hungry (our room is very dry during the winter despite a humidifier).
**Right now our sleep arrangement is such that he naps on our bed, usually with me right next to him. He also falls asleep for the night on our bed, and I move him to the crib set next to our bed for about 4-6 hours in the middle of the night, then bring him back into bed with me for an hour or two in the morning. I love co-sleeping, but for various reasons (this post is already too long) I don't think we can do it full time. So are we doing him a disservice with this arrangement and should I put more emphasis on having him fall asleep in the crib -- and perhaps move him to his own room? (Obviously I wouldn't do it if he has a hard time with it, but sometimes I feel like the co-sleeping is just for my benefit, and he would do fine sleeping on his own ...)
Anyway, sorry this post is so long. I guess I'm just looking for some direction with my nighttime parenting here. He is such a sweet kid who goes to sleep and wakes up smiling. I hesitate to think his sleeping is a "problem" at all, other than I worry about what the future holds. (Next year, DH will be the full-time stay at home parent, so he will be the one to inherit whatever issues manifest.) Basically what I want is a crystal ball or some very experienced mamas to tell me whether I should be doing anything at all at this stage to help him develop the ability to fall asleep by himself, or if I should let nature take its course and just deal with what comes my way.
