Unsettling situation with my kids - Page 4

[~Charlie's~Angel~]

I must be really paranoid and borderline obsessive, because statistics do nothing to ease my worries of my children being "snatched". Must be my upbringing. (My mother watched me and my sister get on the bus until we werent riding it anymore) Nor does the statistics of car accidents being higher then child abductions.

I guess the way my brain rationalizes it is I cannot control the need to use my vehicle. I can control how I safely use carseats and my own driving, but not the driving of others. I can also control my children being met when dropped off by the school bus. One way or the other, I will find a way for them to NOT have to walk home alone, as my mother always did. (she works full time and always has)

FWIW, the school district we are in will not alow a child (7 and younger I THINK) to get off the bus if there is no adult present to meet them. This include the bus that drops off the after school kids at my DCP. And we are talking 6-7 kids. I can't tell you how many times I have been there picking up my boys, and one of the girls is running out to meet the bus so the kids can get off.

[coffeegirl]

Originally Posted by HollyBearsMom

This kind of attitude make me so sad

I think of the kid whose bus driver left him off on the wrong street, miles from his house. His grandmother was frantic when he wasn't on the bus. A kind hearted woman saw him, stopped and got him home (she called the police as well). Should she not have stopped and helped??

I agree with you.

[mamazee]

Well I can't be taking a baby a few blocks to meet the bus twice a day in the dead of winter when my 7-year-old is perfectly capable of walking there and home, and plays all through the neighborhood anyway. And I'm not going to become a huge environmental burden by driving her to school or to the bus stop when she's perfectly capable of walking to and from the bus stop by herself. If my school district had a rule like that, I'd seriously complain. If we lived within a reasonable distance, I'd let her walk alone to school alone, too. I walked alone to and from school in Kindergarten. Things are not more dangerous than they were in the 70s.

A much more common problem for kids is obesity due to not being allowed to run around outside as much as they want and walk to and from school when they live close enough. That IS a much bigger problem than it was in the 70s.

[~Charlie's~Angel~]

Originally Posted by mamazee

A much more common problem for kids is obesity due to not being allowed to run around outside as much as they want and walk to and from school when they live close enough. That IS a much bigger problem than it was in the 70s.

I def agree this is a much more common problem then child abductions, which is why I take a very active role in providing lots of activities for my kids. They are still little, and I will still be a nut about letting them do things alone until they are older, but I am sure I will relax a bit with age. I hope anyway.

[Trinitty]

Originally Posted by Trinitty

a) Normal people who are otherwise strangers KNOW to not offer rides to kids, EVER.

This kind of attitude make me so sad

I think of the kid whose bus driver left him off on the wrong street, miles from his house. His grandmother was frantic when he wasn't on the bus. A kind hearted woman saw him, stopped and got him home (she called the police as well). Should she not have stopped and helped??

It makes me sad too.... but, that's the way things are.

I did amend my post to take out the EVER.... the small child looking bewildered and lost at the bus stop, falls into the category of an emergency. So, yes, in this case, she should have stopped.

A STRANGER has no business stopping and asking children if they need a ride while they are dawdling their way home. That includes friendly mothers on this board.

No matter how kind-hearted you know yourself to be (not addressed to anyone specifically), that child does not know you. That child's parent does not know you. You cannot extend your sense of kindness and your intention of safety and goodness around that child like some sort of exceptional bubble. It is NOT appropriate to interfere with them and offer rides. Because if he or she gets a ride from you, then, they might as well climb into any other stranger's car, right? They mean well too, right?

Like I said, an emergency, yes, do what you can while alerting the parents and police asap that you are helping, let the whole world know that you are dealing with a child which is not your own.

The situation here is different. The child was not in danger. The child did not know the person. The person offered a RIDE. The person did NOT contact the parents. WRONG all around.


Trin.