From nap time to "quiet time"? x-posted in Toddlers

[AmyKT]

I figure you all would be more likely to have been there/done that, so I'll ask you, too.

DD, 27 mos, seems itching to drop her nap. DH, a SAHD, can't live without it. I've heard of people instituting "quiet time" when a child drops a nap, meaning they play in their room, and maybe sleep if they want, for an hour or so. I can't imagine DD consenting to that at this stage. We'd have to seriously barricade her, and I'm sure she'd climb over any gate we put up.

Do you do quiet time? How? Is it just a matter of reinforcing it in the beginning, i.e., repeatedly leading the child back to her room?

And if you tried it and it didn't work, I'd like to hear from you, too.

[snoopy5386]

at 27 months I would guess it is a nap fighting stage and not really give up the nap. I would have him power through and do anything he can to continue the nap - driving in the car, rocking in the stroller in a dark room, lying down with her, rocking in a chair, etc. 27 months is really, really, young to give up a nap. Among her peers DD was one of the first to give up naps at 39-40 months. Several of her friends are over 4 and still nap regularly.

[boigrrrlwonder]

I agree that at that age, she really needs a nap, even if she's resistant. For us, it meant investing in good drapes for the bedroom, committing to getting her up in the morning and putting her down for a nap at a regular time each day, and going through a routine similar to her bedtime routine (for us it's shutting the blinds, turning on a fan for white noise, reading a few books with a dim light, and then nursing to sleep) for naps as well.

[snguyen]

My 3 1/2 year old almost never naps anymore. But there is NO WAY she would ever just go to her room to be by herself while I try to rest-- she hates being alone, and can't understand why I would "send her away" when I'm obviously in the house. So quiet time at our house consists of being in the living room, no TV but maybe some music, and an understanding that mommy is trying to do something (rest, work, etc.) so less talking and interacting, more self-entertainment like books, paints or toys. It may not be everyone's ideal, but it works for us. I do miss her naps, though.

At 27 months, naps are resisted but needed. Best of luck.

[AmyKT]

Thanks, everyone. I think you're right. Although it's a fight, once she goes down for the nap, she's still sleeping for around 1.5 hours. I think the biggest issue is that she has just transitioned to a big bed at night, but DH is still trying to have her nap in her crib. Getting her to lie down, unimpeded in a regular bed during the day is impossible. I suppose we shall weather this transition like all the rest: gradually and with tears on both sides.

[Mittsy]

I put both my kid's, age 4.5 and 3, down for "quiet time" every day. They have a basket of toys they like in each of their rooms, along with some books and games. I always tell them they don't have to nap if they don't want to but they must play quietly for 1hr, and if they start getting noisy I go upstairs and give them a reminder. I never made a big deal of it so my kiddo's have never really given me any trouble on this front.

[pixiekisses]

Uh, no, when nap time is over, it's over. I can't even begin to fathom the "quiet time" thing you talk about. Like, force the kids to be quiet and on their own because mom/dad wants a break? Nope, boggles my mind.
And some of my kids stopped napping at 2 yo. So, not every kid needs to nap for many years.

[AmyKT]

Originally Posted by pixiekisses

Uh, no, when nap time is over, it's over. I can't even begin to fathom the "quiet time" thing you talk about. Like, force the kids to be quiet and on their own because mom/dad wants a break? Nope, boggles my mind.
And some of my kids stopped napping at 2 yo. So, not every kid needs to nap for many years.

I fully support any stay at home parent's need for some down time, as long as it doesn't harm the child. That may come from part-time child care or by working out a "quiet time" arrangement. Maybe some parents are equipped to forego that down time, but I would never begrudge or judge my husband for needing it. I would, too. Just being home all day on the weekends, I do.

[Meems]

First I will agree that I think your LO is young to give up the nap. I would suggest something, anything that will work: driving, strolling, rocking, etc.

My DD is 3 and is not napping daily, but we do have quiet time. I read about it in Kurcinka's book "Raising your Spirited Child" and she suggests having the child stay in their room, reading books or quietly playing. She says after 45 min if they aren't sleeping, to end quiet time. My DD typically won't fall asleep unless I lay down with her but today she asked me to leave so she could look at books.

[wendyland]

I just came to this forum to ask nearly the same thing. My 2 1/2 yo has been having trouble getting to sleep and staying asleep lately. Her dad is home with her 3 days a week. She's been wanting to bed hop and then sometimes falls asleep somewhere and sometimes doesn't. It's been taking at least an hour to get her to sleep when we do get her to sleep. He needs the time so that he can also nap because she sleeps so poorly at night. She does fine at the babysitter, which she has been going to 2 times a week.

Right now, I don't think my daughter is ready to give up naps. We're going to keep trying. I'm going to try darkening the room a little.