Re: article about doctor/sociologist from here

[ThePottersDaughter]

A little while back (maybe a month or two?) I was reading some of the threads on here about discipline and someone had posted a link to two related articled by a sociologist who studied children in another culture, and then wrote an article about children needing to know what is expected of them, and need calm, confident parents. In the second article there was a case study written by a mother who had used this doctor's advice.
Is this ringing a bell to anyone?? I really want to show the article to a friend but can't remember specifics (like the doctor's name or the tribe she studied or anything).

[MariaMadly]

Was it "Who's in Control?" by Jean Liedloff? I don't have the link to the thread, but the link to the article is:

http://www.continuum-concept.org/rea...InControl.html

[ThePottersDaughter]

Yes, thank you! I am bookmarking it this time!

[Storm Bride]

I wish I hadn't read that.

[esteg0]

Of course she doesn't really tell us how we are supposed to be raising our children. She just tells us the people who do things her way are happy. She must have a book she's selling! It was a very interesting read though!

[ArcticRose]

This is the woman who authored the book The Continuum Concept. There is a basic definition of the continuum concept here.

Storm Bride, why do you wish you hadn't read that?

[Storm Bride]

Originally Posted by ArcticRose

Storm Bride, why do you wish you hadn't read that?

I've always been kind of iffy about The Continuum Concept, anyway. Liedloff has this way of comparing and contrasting western people and the Yequana that really gets on my nerves. But, I also found the bit near the beginning of the article about the Yequana children barely even talking around adults kind of...I don't know. It bothered me. I get what she's saying about children learning appropriate adult behaviour by being around it and observing it and all that, but that particular part of it didn't sit well with me, and really negatively affected the way the rest of the article came across to me.

[Dar]

She's a journalist, if I recall. Not a social scientist in any form, anyway. I'd take anything she says about the Yequana with a big grain of salt. Social scientists and others who have lived with or studied the Yequana (and that's not the normal spelling of the group name, either - most anthropologists have transcribed it as Yekwana, I think, or maybe Yekuana) has had a very different impression of their lifestyle.

[ArcticRose]

that particular part of it didn't sit well with me, and really negatively affected the way the rest of the article came across to me.

Thanks for clarifying.

I agree with some of what she says. Her concept is similar to attachment parenting in many ways. Keeping your infant close, preferably in contact, not letting them cio, breast feeding on demand, etc. But she takes it a slightly different direction in the way you interact with your baby/toddler.

Some things that might work when you live in a tribe in the jungle just aren't compatible with the average modern life style.

I do agree that you can give your kids too much control and that this doesn't make for healthy family. Kids do need boundaries. They need someone to be the parent, someone they can look to who is in charge.

The above is all based on my limited understanding of the continuum concept, and therefore could be totally off base, lol.

I am having some difficulty finding that happy medium between being The Parent, in charge and in control, and being loving and understanding of my baby's baby ways.

When she hits me in the face and pulls my hair because she is mad (this is a recent development) what do I do to stop that behavior? What started it in the first place? Something is frustrating her, but I don't know what. And I can't just ignore it and let her do it. (ouch) Telling her, firmly, to stop, doesn't seem to have any effect at all.

The continuum concept seems to imply that if I had followed attachment parenting correctly (I know she doesn't call it that, but that is what it boils down to) I wouldn't be having this problem at all. I did/do my best. I really don't know what piece of the puzzle I am missing here.

I'm not tying to hijack this thread, I'm just thinking out loud. Or in type.