how old was your child when you let him or her take a bath without you in the room? - Page 6

[GoBecGo]

My DD will be 4 in April, she never has a bath totally alone, but i rarely spend an entire bath time right there either. I potter about nearby - she only has a bath on her own about 10% of the time i wash her anyway. Mostly she has a shower or a bath with me. In those cases i run the bath, pop her in, strip, get in myself, wash, get out, dry off and dress in whatever i'm wearing after and then get her out - if whatever i'm wearing is in another room i will leave her to it, but not for more than a few minutes. I am not at all worried about her drowning at this stage, it's more that she enjoys chats (24/7, in the bath is no exception) and likes company.

At 13 months she couldn't stand yet, and i still bathed her mainly in the kitchen sink, so i was right there. When she fit in it (until about 9months) i bathed her in the tummy tub, which you'd be hard-pressed to drown in (i.e. get out, turn around and dive back in head first) but i still never left her (of course). I was never very worried about drowning actually, but i have a friend who's a dentist who told me once that about 90% of the work he does on under-3's is for smashed teeth from falling in the bath, and i have several friends whose kids (all boys, probably by chance) have broken teeth in the bath.

I think i began popping out to get things when DD was around 14 months if she was in her baby tub in the big tub, but she was probably in that arrangement maybe once a month (when the kitchen sink was full of dishes). I'd be real fast. In my defence (not that i need one since nothing untoward ever occurred, even if that was luck rather than judgement) i was a single parent - i could have hollered for a week for a towel but no-one was there to care or help. The vast majority of the time i was there, and i was very well organised, but if something unexpected happened (like the towel or nappy was dragged into the water, or she pooped in the bath water, or some other thing which meant i HAD to leave the room again to fetch something) i just dealt. I would get her to start counting or singing so i could hear she was ok, and i would run.

I'm not very alarmist about it all. Children CAN drown in an inch of water, but there are a million things which CAN happen and it's just that we're more aware of some of them. I know of a kid who took a swig of a fizzy water at about 13 months (he wasn't given it, he'd swiped it) and choked a little. He was fine right away without help (no-one had to tip him up or rap his back or anything), and his mother moved the drink and kept an eye on him. He went to bed seeming perfectly fine and was dead when she went to get him up. He'd died of secondary drowning. Something which is so unlikely to happen the coroner said it was near-impossible, but there it was in front of them.

I'm gonna get me a 20gallon tub!

[FondestBianca]

There is no way I would let very mobile, curious, 14 month old ds take a bath without me in the room. He and 4 y/o dd usually take a bath together and even with her watching I don't leave. Ds likes to stand, climb, and dunk his face for fun. He slips on occasion landing on his back. He panics when water rushes over his head then tries to claw his way out of the bath until I calm him down. When he pours water over his head on purpose it's all fun a games but when it's an accident he panics. Ds was walking at 9 months, running about 2 weeks later, climbs and prolem solves all day long... but his level of mobility and ability by no means indicates he should be left alone in the bath.

Dd is 4.25 and only after 3.5 or so did I start leaving the bathroom for any period of time. I'll check on dinner right around the corner, answer the phone, grab a towel or clothes, etc.... but if I'm going to be longer than a minute I make sure she is talking, singing, or doing something that allows me to hear her. She likes to play pretend in the bath so she's usually talking anyway. She has never been the type to stand in the bath (like ds) or do dangerous things for fun (like ds) but, thats an area where I'd rather not take any chances so early. She doesn't happen to be in the bath alone often anymore because she prefers taking a bath with her brother and I'm not comfortbale leaving him alone. While I know dd would call me if anything happened and help her brother stay safe I'm not comfortable witht hat scenerio.

But honestly, there is nothing so important you need to leave a babe that young. Not to be judgemental or rude but, I'm totally puzzled by the idea of a 13 month old alone in a slippery bath of water.

[Geist]

What does that have to do with anything? It's the mouth being covered that's the problem.

Plus, the main danger isn't submersion, it's hitting his head when he slips getting in and out of the tub like you say he does all the time (slipping while getting in and out).

It's good to have the water shallow, but it doesn't mean he's safe. If anything, you'd check on him more often with deeper water.

Mainly because then he can't drown from submersion alone...he'd have to have something keeping his head under. Even young babies, when they can't breathe, struggle and move their head to the side. The biggest danger is that he would hit his head, but that's a danger with everyone, not just a small child. There's no preventing anyone from slipping, aside from no one taking baths. This is why there's always one of us nearby. It's not like we put him in the tub and then pop off to the store. If I'm not in the bathroom, I'm in the kitchen (right next door to the bathroom) and my husband is in his office, right down the hall, where he can see our son from his desk.
I don't see the point of being in the bathroom the whole time. He falls just as frequently.

Children can drown in an inch of water.

As can adults, if they are unable to move their head. The amount of water is most important when the head (and, the rest of the child) can move. It makes it more likely for drowning to occur.

[phathui5]

I'm comfortable leaving my 4yo for a minute so I can go grab something or flip the laundry. With my 2yo, I'm still in the room the whole time.

[leighi123]

Ds is 2.5 and takes baths on his own, he can wash his hair/body (I do a once-over too). He can climb out on his own, but I've taught him not to stand in the bath, so he just yells when he is done so I can supervise him getting out (which is the dangerous part) Usually Im in the sewing room (which connects to the bathroom) w/ the door open, so I can hear him the whole time, if he gets quiet I go check on him, its always when he lays on his back to rinse his hair!

As soon as I trusted him to not stand in the bath, I havent been sitting in there the whole time (around 20months old)

Also, he did take ISR lessons at 19months, and learned how to hold his breath, turn to his back for air, look for the side, grab on etc.... at that age I was letting him jump in the pool and swim to the steps with me just sitting with my feet in the water, he never had a problem.

[eclipse]

My oldest started showering on his own at about 18 months - in a shower stall type shower, not a tub. It was in the master bathroom, and I wouldn't go farther than the bedroom itself. I'm not sure how old in the bathtub - I think I would leave for short bursts of time when he was around 4 1/2 and dd was around 2. The two of them were so loud in the bath tub that I could hear them from any corner of our tiny apartment. I'd say I let dd and ds2 stay alone for short periods of time when dd was around 3 1/2 and ds was aroun 18 months - I'm nto sure though, it might have been later. DD will be 7 in June and ds is 4 and a few months and they still bathe together. We have a much bigger house now, and I'm not comfortable going down stairs or anything, but anywhere on the same floor is fair game for me at this point. I would let dd take a bath completely unsupervised, but ds still needs some supervision.

[jacie87]

I started letting DD be in the bath alone between 16-18 months while I was in the next room folding clothes, as long as the door was open. However, now she is two and has discovered that if she puts her mouth in the water, she can blow bubbles (my fault for showing her the last time we had a bath together), so I'm in there with her constantly now. I probably won't let DD2 bathe alone so early though.

[Abraisme]

My DS was somewhere between 2-3 when I started leaving him alone. I would however run to the other room and grab my phone or a drink or whatever before 2. He's 6 now and has been bathing alone full time for a few years. Yes, he's made some messes, but nothing that can't be cleaned up. I agree with the others that 13mo is too young to leave alone for more than a few seconds..

[KaliShanti]

Originally Posted by treemom2

With DD I would sit outside the door and read or something at 2 years old. I'd even go get a drink. Granted, I could always hear her singing or babbling and if she stopped I'd say her name and she would respond with an I'm okay or start singing again. Unless she talks a lot or makes a lot of verbal noises, I don't think I'd be comfortable leaving her. It also depends on how big your place is.

This is what I do with my almost-3-year old. We have a very small house. I stay where I can hear him, and he is very loud when playing in the bath. If he gets quiet, I say, "Say, 'Mama." and he replies, "Mama".

[new2this]

I don't have a LO yet but my first response when reading the initial question was 5 with checking up to make sure they wash ect.

2 I could see stepping out for a minute or two but 13 months is just way to young IMO. stepping out to grab a towel sure since they are still in eye site.


Not to be a snarky comment or anything like that so I don't want people to take it that way, but I guess I just assumed it would be common sense for the most part. But maybe that has to do with all the baths I had to give while babysitting and with my neices and nephews too so for me it is just more on the common sense side of things.

[ramama]

My youngest is 4 and she bathes all the time! I simply cannot sit there with her! She takes a bath at least once a day and is in there for HOURS! I check in on her, or call her name. I may lay in the bed and read a book (the bathroom is in the master bedroom), but usually I'm not even on the same floor as she is. I don't know if I would have done it younger (I may have around 3.5, I don't remember) because the frequent looooooong baths are a relatively new development. She's a very calm bather.

My 6yo bathes alone, and did when she was 5, but I don't think I let her bathe alone at 4 because she was a very active bather and made thumping and splashing noises that had me running LOL. I would chill out on the bed, not sit right there next to the tub, but still...

[childsplay]

Well mine are 5, 5, and 7, when they were younger, (under 3) never. I could just never trust that one wouldn't try to stand up, slip, hit their head on the faucet, the edge, their sister/brother. I'd grab a book though, and sometimes a glass of wine, fold a comfy towel over the toilet lid and relax while they splashed and played.

As they got older I'd find something to do in the hall outside the open bathroom door, usually fold laundry.

Now I just stay on the same floor and check in every few minutes, I still wash their hair for them too. Usually though, I just end up folding laundry again. Hmmm, I kind of miss my good book and glass of wine time though!

Oh another thing - THE MESS!!! You'll be surprised at how much water kids can get OUT of the tub onto the floor in the 90 seconds you're out of the bathroom!

[Shannie77]

I am comfortable leaving my almost 3 year old while I go to our bedroom and get something, or step our for a couple of minutes. Our upstairs is very small and I can hear her from any room easily. She basically sings the whole time she is in the bath, so that is reassuring.

At 13 months I don't think I left her for more then a few seconds (our linen closet is right out the door). At 13 months my DD had been walking for a few months, and was extremely mobile. She would try to climb out of the tub or do other acrobatics. For the most part I still showered with her anyways so she didn't bathe very often. But around 2 was when I started leaving her to go get a book or toy from another room.

[Evan&Anna's_Mom]

I think I was OK stepping out 10 steps to grab a towel when they were about 18 mo. or so, but we really are talking about a 2 second grab. Beyond that, I think I stayed in the room until they were about 2 or 2 1/2 or so, when I started in and out but always within about a 2 room radius of the bathtub. About 4 I was comfortable leaving them alone in the shower (which they preferred by that age) and in the bathtub as long as the door was open and I could hear them. By 5 I was coming in just to wash DD's hair (DS has super short hair and could do it on his own by 4). DD just turned 7 and now I am comfortable with her being completely independent and I don't even worry about being on the same floor of the house.

[Storm Bride]

I'm pretty laidback about a lot of things, including the bathtub.

That said, I honestly don't remember how old ds1 was, as we kind of morphed from leaving for a second, to leaving for a minute, to spending part of the bath out of visual range, but within hearing, etc.

DH supervises most baths for dd1 and ds2. They're mostly alone now, but dh pops in to check on them periodically, and is in either the hallway outside or in our room (next door down the hall), with both doors open. DD1 is almost 7, and ds2 is 4.5. We feel that they're probably safe, but would rather be sure they're behaving in a safe fashion, and not trashing the bathroom.

At 13 months, I can't see myself leaving a child at all. I might pop out into the hallway to grab a towel or cloth, if I'd forgotten them...but I could more-or-less do that without taking my eyes off them. Our linen closet door is on the same side as the bathroom door, and only a few inches away. I'd have to look away long enough to see what I was grabbing, but that's it. I don't even know for sure if I'd do that, as I never actually have.