For people who have changed religions/beliefs

[thatgirliknew]

I was raised mostly by my Catholic grandmother. I don't really feel drawn to any particular religion now, I'm still searching (whole different post). But I still find myself doing some things that she raised me doing, for example sign of the cross when a funeral procession or ambulance goes by (I don't know if that's a "Catholic thing" or just something she did, but I always did that when I was younger) and praying for God to keep me safe before I leave the house or while I'm driving. It doesn't feel right to me to do these things when I don't believe anymore, but something doesn't feel right if I don't do these things. There are other small things too, these are the two that my husband pointed out I still do.

Just wondering if anyone else finds themselves doing things like this?

[umsami]

I'm sure there are things I still do unconsciously from my Presbyterian upbringing (I'm Muslim now). I actually think there's nothing wrong with what you're doing... .it's a way to connect with and honor your Grandma. To me, that's a great thing.

[objet_trouve]

I left fundamentalist protestant christianity about 5 or 6 years ago. I am asatru pagan and Unitarian Universalist now, my husband is atheist and UU. For the first few years, I had subconcious beliefs and tendencies that I've since (for the most part) purged.

The two big ones for me were proselytizing and church going. Sundays made me very depressed without somewhere to go, something to do. Going to the UU church made all of that go away instantly. Something about getting up and meeting with likewise thinkers just makes all the difference in the world. Proselytizing was a lot harder. I spent more time doing street ministry in high school than schoolwork, so I have a really hard time in waiting rooms, checkout lines and other common situations, because I feel the need to strike up a conversation, and I feel like I need to help people, but no longer have a "pitch". Activism helps a little, but for the most part, I just had to constantly reinforce my belief that people should find their own way, and I should leave them alone unless they ask.

So yeah, I still have urges and wierd rituals, but I've come a long way. A lot of it is normal, but if it bothers you, you should do something about it.

[annekh23]

Sign of the cross is as far as I know only catholic, but I don't think it's inappropriate to do if you see a funeral posession.

As for praying to God to keep you safe, do you believe in God? if so, then why not pray to him? And if you are praying to him, why not find out other things about him.

[SeekingSerenity]

I had a really hard time with even saying the word "pagan" when I finally acknowledged my true path. For so many years, I'd tried to conform to the Christian path. For what it's worth, it's a wonderful Way for those who are drawn to it, but it wasn't for me. I've been a pagan in my heart since I was a child, however putting a name to it was difficult, and it was even harder to get past that feeling that I was condemning myself to someone else's Hell by worshipping a "false idol".

In the end I had to accept that my problems stemmed from society's labels. Most of the world that I knew believed anything "pagan" to be purest evil, an idea that dated back to medieval times. Once I researched origins of the beliefs and the words themselves, I realized that the labels were just words that had been created to inspire fear. Same with rituals. If you are very used to crossing yourself, then you will do it automatically whether you believe in what that motion is supposed to represent or not. I still say "I pray to God" or "I hope to God" even though I am not Christian.. and that is okay, because my current Pagan beliefs allow for a universal Creator that goes by any name you want to use.

Be gentle with yourself. It's okay to make motions that help you feel better, regardless of the origins. It's okay to think of a vague, undefined "god" because there is no one RIGHT way to believe. What works for you is what's right for you.

(Can you believe that I still toss a pinch of salt over my shoulder when the salt shaker spills? There's a deep, ingrained, inherently-Irish part of me that thinks that will keep the bad luck away. Of course, a more evolved, educated part of me thinks it's silly, and it does not matter... but I do it anyway. If it makes you feel better.... who cares? )

[readermaid]

I left fundamentalist religion just over a year ago (am now agnostic), and it was months before I lost the urge to pray before I fell asleep at night.

[4myfinn]

I left the Mormon Church nine years ago and still do things like that. I think much of it is subconscious. I thought most of it had stopped, but since DS was born I find myself singing Mormon children's songs to him. I'm to the point, though, where I don't really care. They're sweet songs and not really about anything religious. One of them is called "Popcorn Popping on the Apricot Tree." It's just about looking out a window on a spring day and being surprised by the apricot tree that looks like it's covered in popcorn. It's fun to sing and has little hand motions that go with it, so we sing it. And we have fun.

When I first left Mormonism I was so paranoid about completely separating myself from everything Mormon. Now I think I've just relaxed. I absolutely do not believe in the LDS faith and never plan on going back, but I realize it is a part of my past and the culture I grew up in. To think that I can expect a permanent and total separation from all things Mormon isn't realistic. My whole family lives in Utah and many of them are still active LDS. When my grandparents and my mom died last year their funerals were all held in Mormon churches. I hadn't been in a church in years, but I just went and wasn't bothered by it at all. I thought it was going to be a big deal and had pictured in my head what it would be like to go back to a Mormon church, but it turned out to be really anti-climatic.

I guess what I'm trying to say, is that if those little things make you feel better, by all means, continue to do them. It doesn't mean you're in danger of slipping back into Catholicism. Sometimes those little reminders of our past are just comforting.

[lilyka]

The sign of the cross is a prayer. It makes perfect sense to do it when you see a funeral procession or an ambulance (and it is not confined to Catholics all orthodox and some Lutherans and I think anglicans and it is gaining popularity in more protestant churches again). Even if you do not believe in God entirely or do not know what your believe about Him or believe differently than you used to it is still OK to make the sign of the corss and to pary for people. You can hold onto those little things if ou like. But you are calling upon the power of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit when you do that so be sur eyou are ok with that if you choose to do it.

[SunshineJ]

DH and I left the Christian path really about 3 years ago or so. It wasn't until about a year ago that we were willing to acknowledge that we are Pagan, and it wasn't until sometime within the past 6 months that we began following the paths that we are on now. I was born a coward, in that I'm still scared of the dark, spiders, and a few other minor things, so praying for protection was a huge one with me. I have an irregular heartbeat (medicated) so at night when I fall asleep it was pure habit to ask that I live to wake in the morning. (The condition isn't fatal, but still...) It took a long time to figure out that one, and you're right, praying to a god I didn't believe in didn't feel right at all. Until we found our path, I would just pray to the "higher power or powers that may be out there". Now that we've been able to define our paths, and reconcile how they work if you will, I find that I do still pray at night. Only, as Asatru believe that the gods are more companions to help you along, my prayers to Frigga and Odin are more conversationalist in nature if that makes any sense.

[chipper26]

I used to do things like pray when in a plane (especially at take off and landing) or if something was frightening me or felt unsafe. Then I would think about the purpose of it, I mean, am I being true to what I believe at other times? Do I expect God to rescue me when I'm not really sure I believe in a personal God?

I think that it can't be a convenience thing for me - using it or Him when I really need to but ditching it all the rest of the time. I also started to feel like it was superstitious, like crossing your fingers or knocking on wood. Sorry, lots of random thoughts at this late hour.

I still revert back to a lot of the same feelings and thoughts, because I lived this for so long and was brought up with it being so real to me. I have to really be rational sometimes and separate myself from the little girl who learn it.

[thatgirliknew]

Originally Posted by chipper26

I used to do things like pray when in a plane (especially at take off and landing) or if something was frightening me or felt unsafe. Then I would think about the purpose of it, I mean, am I being true to what I believe at other times? Do I expect God to rescue me when I'm not really sure I believe in a personal God?

That is exactly what I feel sometimes. You kind of took the words right out of my mind.

[thatgirliknew]

Originally Posted by SeekingSerenity

I still say "I pray to God" or "I hope to God" even though I am not Christian.. and that is okay, because my current Pagan beliefs allow for a universal Creator that goes by any name you want to use.

That's the other thing, I know God comes in many different ways but for some reason I just can't shake the "Christian" God from being the only God in my mind.

(I don't know if how I said that makes sense.)

[thatgirliknew]

And it's nice to know I'm not the only one.

And that there are people on here supportive of us who are "searching" spiritually.

[anj_rn]

I was raised missouri synod lutheran, spent some time in a non-denom, progressive, christian church, studdied Judiasm (my mom and sis converted), and then found peace in the nazarene church.

Throughout my walk, I have found that there are some things I still prefer or feel more comfortable with. My church has become my second family, and just like my bio family there are some people I do not see eye to eye with, and some who think I am a nut.

The bottom line for me is that I am secure in my personal beliefs, and I have found a church home where I can express those beliefs. Do what feels right to you.

[wombatclay]

Raised Catholic (Irish mom, Italian Dad ), searched for a while, am happily pagan UU. DH was raised in an Agnostic/Catholic family and is himself happily UU, though more christian flavored than I am. So, that's the background I'm coming from.

The sermon at my UU church the other day sort of spoke to this subject... the analogy used for the sermon was that religion is a story and more important than the "truth" of the story is how it helps you live and shape your life. So it's not a question of one story being better than another, and it's ok to decide that one story no longer inspires you while a story you never thought much about suddenly makes a lot of sense. The real question is how does the story make you feel, how does it help you be a "better" person, how does it encourage or support or direct you in a positive way.

Now, the focus of the analogy wasn't on changing religin per se, but it applies in my mind. I guess I'd say that if there are habits or intentions or patterns from your previous religious training that help you live a positive and supported life, then those things are good! You shouldn't feel like you have to push everything from the old story out of your life in order to enjoy the new story.

[ER RN Mom]

I'm having some "transition" issues myself right now. I was raised Catholic and really enjoyed it. About 8 years ago I started to become drawn to the Pagan path and followed it for about 2 years. I then went back to observing the Catholic faith and traditions. My husband is agnostic, but we were married in the Church and our baby was baptized Catholic. All the time, I was luke-warm (at best), at really feeling a connection to my faith.

Now, here I am again, feeling a little lost and alone. Recently I came to the realization that, despite all the years I spent telling the world I was Christian, I was really just going through the motions (literally at times). I don't accept Jesus Christ as my savior. There is it. I feel like the more I observe any faith, the more excluded other groups become. Exclusion IS NOT the message I want to give to my children. So why am I afraid to say that I'm not a Christian?

I think part of me feels like the world wants me to have a title. I need to be classified. I don't know if there is a God. I think there may be. But if there is, do you think He/She would need me to be classified??? Does God REALLY care what religion we are??

[javilu]

Originally Posted by ER RN Mom

Does God REALLY care what religion we are??

i don't think god cares what religion, if any, we are. religion is for us, really. to help us understand god and express that, maybe with others who feel they experience or perceive god similarly. some people experience and understand and name god best in that context. others do not. but god? god doesn't have a religion or need a religion. religion is like that saying...a finger pointing at the moon. don't get distracted by the finger itself. it may be a guide, but it sure ain't the moon.

[*EarthMama*]

Originally Posted by thatgirliknew

I was raised mostly by my Catholic grandmother. I don't really feel drawn to any particular religion now, I'm still searching (whole different post). But I still find myself doing some things that she raised me doing, for example sign of the cross when a funeral procession or ambulance goes by (I don't know if that's a "Catholic thing" or just something she did, but I always did that when I was younger) and praying for God to keep me safe before I leave the house or while I'm driving. It doesn't feel right to me to do these things when I don't believe anymore, but something doesn't feel right if I don't do these things. There are other small things too, these are the two that my husband pointed out I still do.

Just wondering if anyone else finds themselves doing things like this?

I was raised "born again" Christian and am now on a Pagan Path. It has been a long and rewarding journey. My spirituality is very eclectic and I have found that much of Christianity still resonates with me, while much of it doesn't. Initially I swore off almost all Christian teachings... but now I see that there is truth, it is just picking it out and finding it. The beauty is that we can pick and choose and let our hearts guide us to our own inner truths. Perhaps some of your practices, such as praying to God for protection, serve you in some way? It is the way you have always connected. Perhaps it is not the practices that need to change but the context... By that I mean, perhaps you need to really look and and define who you believe God to be. It sounds as though it may be quite different from your Catholic upbringing and that is what doesn't feel right about these practices- praying to THAT God. Sometimes I sub universe or spirit or angels for the word God and find I have much more access to and expansion within my own spirituality when I do this. Often instead of asking God to protect me (since much of my journey has been finding God within myself) I will simply surround myself or others in white light when I am seeking peace or protection. There are so many beautiful things you can do to keep your connection with the divine, it may just "look" different than it use to. Do what feels right and not what you "should" be doing. Creating our own belief system and transforming old ways is a miraculous and exciting time so HAVE FUN!

[ER RN Mom]

Originally Posted by puffnstuff

religion is like that saying...a finger pointing at the moon. don't get distracted by the finger itself. it may be a guide, but it sure ain't the moon.

I like that.

[Ravin]

Ritual and belief aren't necessarily the same thing. Prayer, for example, is something humans do for our own benefit--it gives comfort, or confidence, or whatever. Much like meditation, etc. It sounds to me like you still want ritual in your life, even if you've ditched the dogma of your childhood faith. There's nothing wrong with that.