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Mums of Many - It's February already! - Page 3

post #41 of 88
hey darci- thanks for sharing. My pregnancy history has some similarities. Had 2 healthy boys/uneventful pregnancies (though #2 was 41 w 6 days). Had 2 miscarriages, then baby #3 my bp started creeping up at the end of pregnancy (baseline for me is 114/78). She was born at 41w6d and my bp had been hovering at 140/??. Then this last pregnancy (baby #4) at 36 weeks my bp went to 155/100 and stayed there. If I rested, got the kids out of the house, I could get it down to 135/90. I also had traces of protein. I had a killer headache immediately following the birth. I didn't think I had swollen (my ankles didn't), but now looking back at pictures my face was clearly swollen. I'm pre-diabetic and not sure if any connection between pre-e and diabetes, but have drastically changed my diet in an effort to stave off pre-e issues with the next pregnancy though I was consuming tons of protein and that didn't seem to make a difference. In hindsight, I wouldn't choose to have homebirthed with my last and I'm not really sure why my midwife let me?

Anyway, I'd love to homebirth with #5 when it is time for #5, but knowing how shi*** I felt after #4's birth, I'd rather not chance seizures/strokes/etc just to be able to say #5 was born at home. While I'd like to hope that my dietary changes will impact my bp, I'm not very confident that it will. Regardless, it is better for me to get off of processed foods/white flour/sugar.

Good luck with the pre-e, it stinks for sure, but a healthy mom and babe is the main objective, not the birth location.
post #42 of 88
Congrats Kat! Welcome Elm!
looking forward to more births this month.
I'm in the middle of M/S and extreme fatigue..how many times can I give the excuse that I was puking and thats why my son is a late for school?
post #43 of 88
PJs-- I was definitely swollen at the end of my last pgncy! I could only wear one pair of flipflops (my other flipflops were too small!). My hands were swollen for the first time ever! I actually had to remove my wedding ring, something I've never had to before. My face was swollen, too. I gained 5 pounds in the last 3 days I was pregnant, although I had gained only 17 pounds up to that point. The day I was induced, I was +1 for protein in my urine. I definitely had prenatal pre-e. Funny thing, though, is that you can develop pre-e postpartum, too. And I did that, also. I was almost re-admitted to the hospital on the day they were set to release my son from NICU. I ended up being on Lasix for a couple days and wearing TED hose for 2 weeks. My BP went way down after my son was born, but shot right back up around 2 days pp. It took a good 10 days-2 weeks to get it back down into normal range.
This time, I have watched my sodium intake, but not reduced it too much (I crave olives and pickles, but try not to eat too many!), and I have increased my protein intake, too. But I am having spikes already, anyway. I have gained about 12 pounds so far and I started pgncy at a size 6. I don't have any other health problems; pregnancy related or otherwise. Since I'm seeing an OB now, I'll have the GTT test next week, but my finger pricks have shown my sugars to be well below "concern" zone.
post #44 of 88
Can I lurk here? I have 3 now...turned 5 in Oct. (ds) turned 3 in January (dd) and 15 months (ds)

*I* want ONE more, I think dh would probably have more. Some days. Other days he says 3 is plenty, even too many lol.

I do NOT want one more until 2011, lol. Part of it is because I am HOPING, PRAYING and thinking that DS WILL be in a high-parental-involvement school in our district and that I will have to commit 1/2 day to his classroom. (IN the classroom, not projects at home or PTA meetings or anything like that.) So that will be from August 2010 to May 2011.

This is not an activity where I could bring a baby. And there's no "pumping break", and well, pumps and I don't do very well together anyway. So, I do not want to have a newborn during his kindy year. (my personal philosophy goes against leaving my babies that long pretty much the entire first year.)

After the first year, it's 2 hours in-the-school/classroom time mandatory. I can see that as a lot more feasible.

The other half of my reason is that I really feel the age gap of not quite 22 months between DD and DS2 was too close. For *me*. Probably because I also had a child who was 4 plus a month. I think if that had been my first two, it may have been OK, but I really feel like DS1 got "overlooked" because of the needs of the two 'babies." And that is just now starting to change as I can have a lot of fun with the older two with the same activities and the baby is getting more able to hang out with Daddy sometimes.

Also I feel like DD got pushed out of her 'baby spot.' The pregnancy definently force-night-weaned her. I do NOT want to go through that again. (It was nightmarish--literally we went from nursing OK at bedtime to *screaming furiously* because of the lack of milk overnight. It took a good 2-3 weeks for her to adjust. DH was at work at bedtime, so my parents had to come help me with her, it just was not working for her to fall asleep with me in any other way, being with me just gave her more frustration about the nursing.) And she was still a BABY. It was horrible all around.
Has anyone else felt this in their families or do I have way too much 'mama guilt?"

And after 2 this close, I'm just not quite ready to go back to pregnancy and a newborn yet.

But....by say, June 2011, my current 15 month old child would be 2 and 7 months old...by then he won't be a "baby" like DD was. He could very well be done nursing by then, and if he's like my other two, he'll likely be close to being out of diapers.
This is where DS1 was by the time DD started being active...it's like when she was a newborn, all I had to do was hold and nurse her, I could do that anytime, anywhere and still have a hand free for things like reading a book to the older one.

Is it EVERYONE that feels like maybe their oldest got shafted when the third came along? Is it that all of mine were *really young?* Cause I felt like I couldn't really do for him, my lap was literally full with DD who was not even 2 and a newborn.

Does it help to have a larger age gap when you go from 2 to 3 and upward from there?
post #45 of 88
Kind of a quick response as I should be busying myself about the house.... but I wanted to say to peaceful_mama that I understand what you're thinking! I too have over analyzed much of what you're talking about. My last 2 are 21 mos apart & the ones before that were 24 mos apart. My kids before THAT were 8 years apart! lol So I can definitely compare having kids close & far apart.

What I personally have come to the conclusion of, is that my kids that are very close in age, in the long run, are going to be very happy. Or at least I hope. Because even though there are so many little stressors when they're young & adjusting to their new siblings, in the long run they're not going to spend time thinking about how annoying it was to make all those adjustments to the new baby. Instead they're going to have a great time playing with their sibling, laughing & bonding, being friends, & growing up together. You know what they say- the relationships we have with our siblings are the longest relationships we have in our lives.

I think we tend, as mamas, to beat ourselves up with guilt. I feel so bad for my 25 month old's desire to breastfeed that I continue to tandem, even though I hate it! But I feel so guilty for my wanting to breastfeed his new sibling alone that I give in to my toddler's pleas to nurse. But really, how much is this going to effect him in the long run? Won't he be MUCH more effected by the fact that he has this close brother relationship for life than by his breastfeeding yrs cut a little shorter than he'd like? Y'know?

My 11 yr old son is very open about his thoughts on the matter. He's told me again & again how he wishes he got to have close siblings to play with. I had him in my 1st marriage & our relationship wasn't healthy enough to have any more kids together. Now that I'm with my dreamy 2nd husband, we're having a great time having lots of babies. My 11 yr old has pointed out how they will always have friends, right in the house, to play games & have fun with. It makes me sad (there's that guilt again! lol) & I wish that I could have given him a close in age sibling.

Anyway, am I explaining myself well?? My point is that when you think about it all in the long run, I don't think these few yrs of adjusting are going to bother our kids. I think they will be too happy to have their close sibling buddies. So, I try hard not to tell myself that that my older kids "got shafted' when the new baby came. Because in some ways, I had the new baby FOR my older kids. They may not appreciate it as much today, but in a yr or 2, their delighted giggles while running across the rm together, & hysterical laughter while hiding together in a fort they built, will make it all worth it!

And here's my own personal thing I'm already overanalyzing: Do I want the next baby to be super close in age to my last baby, or do I have them further apart because I cannot stand tandem nursing??! I think the kids would be happier close in age, but would *I* be able to put up with the nursing issue? I don't think so. I want a break from tandeming so my thoughts for today are that I'd prefer to conceive during the summer of 2011. Then my youngest will be about 20 mos. old & feel I'll ok about weaning him during pregnancy. ........ but then my mind circles back to thinking that maybe that's too far apart & the youngest kids won't be close friends & I feel guilty...... it's a vicious cycle!

So, there's my "quick response".
post #46 of 88
See, I fell guilty because my baby (3 mos) seems to get the shaft. If I need to cook lunch or change dd's poopy diaper, he gets thrown in the swing. Sure, I wear him quite a bit, but he gets heavy after awhile (he was 14 lbs at 2 months). I'm trying to teach the older kids (we homeschool), pay some attention to my 2.5 yo dd (who I feel she gets the shaft too), and the baby gets nursed on demand, but there aren't those hours of cooing and snuggling and with dd there aren't afternoons spent coloring/creating/reading because I'm busy trying to keep 4 kids and two parents, fed, clothed and sheltered (keeping our house inhabitable, not immaculate). I think I feel guilty all around, but there are some days when I feel like I haven't connected with ANY of them because I'm busy keeping up with the basics.
post #47 of 88
Yeah, I could have written nearly every word of your post, pjs! Except substitute bouncy seat for swing, and the fact that I *do* feel guilt for not keeping the house immaculate!

But you know what, I'd feel guilty if I only had one kid that got all my attention because I'd think he was bored & lonely without siblings so there's no winning for me. I just feel guilt for everything! hahaha.

(But seriously, I try try try not to dwell on it. Most of the time. I'm happy with my lot in life. And I'm super proud of my kidlet herd.)
post #48 of 88
I try not to put too much thought into spacing, but each baby has had a bigger gap. lol. well, almost.
10 months, 22 months, 25 months and then after 4 years 'BOO' twins (4 minute gap)

I've had all kinds of plans go wrong, tandem fed same age/ diff age children, weaned and re b'fed, weaned early, weaned late.......ultimately just gone with the flow and everything has both advantages and disadvantages.

Be overwhelmed sister: and enjoy every minute of it
post #49 of 88
mini rant alert:

so, i keep reading all these joyous accounts of mothers moving through their days with grace and beauty WITH 2/3 CHILDREN and if i try and replace them with 4 OR MORE!!! it just doesn't work. i keep hearing bickering in the background and someone complaining. then someone trips over a tree branch in the perfect scene and cuts their knee. we now have to have an emergency first aider or pick up said child and drag them back to the car

kwim???

we have lots of joyous, fantastic trips/walks and arguments, but they never happen how the books and articles say they should

and how do you get any peace and quiet if you home ed with a larger family???

excuse me. it's one of those nights
post #50 of 88
Quote:
Originally Posted by ~bookcase~ View Post
mini rant alert:

so, i keep reading all these joyous accounts of mothers moving through their days with grace and beauty WITH 2/3 CHILDREN and if i try and replace them with 4 OR MORE!!! it just doesn't work. i keep hearing bickering in the background and someone complaining. then someone trips over a tree branch in the perfect scene and cuts their knee. we now have to have an emergency first aider or pick up said child and drag them back to the car

kwim???

we have lots of joyous, fantastic trips/walks and arguments, but they never happen how the books and articles say they should

and how do you get any peace and quiet if you home ed with a larger family???

excuse me. it's one of those nights
I hear ya'!

I've got four (ages 11, 9, 6, 2) and our life is chaotic. There's always one who doesn't want to leave the house AT ALL, or if we do get out one wants to walk down THIS street when the others insist we have to walk down THAT street. There's usually somebody who is grumpy/fidgety/just plain obnoxious at the dinner table, which precludes any meaningful conversation. The older two who do lessons never want to sit down at the same time to do them, and whenever I try to help one of them with the lessons my 2yo decides he has to nurse/sit on the potty/have a story read...
post #51 of 88
~bookcase~ you are cracking me up. You do not get peace and quiet with oodles of kids at home. The other day only the younger two were around and it was a vacation. Dh commented on how some people think a 2 and 4 yo are work and we think it is a break.
post #52 of 88
Congrats Kat
post #53 of 88
Quote:
Originally Posted by peaceful_mama View Post
Can I lurk here? I have 3 now...turned 5 in Oct. (ds) turned 3 in January (dd) and 15 months (ds)

*I* want ONE more, I think dh would probably have more. Some days. Other days he says 3 is plenty, even too many lol.

I do NOT want one more until 2011, lol. Part of it is because I am HOPING, PRAYING and thinking that DS WILL be in a high-parental-involvement school in our district and that I will have to commit 1/2 day to his classroom. (IN the classroom, not projects at home or PTA meetings or anything like that.) So that will be from August 2010 to May 2011.

This is not an activity where I could bring a baby. And there's no "pumping break", and well, pumps and I don't do very well together anyway. So, I do not want to have a newborn during his kindy year. (my personal philosophy goes against leaving my babies that long pretty much the entire first year.)

After the first year, it's 2 hours in-the-school/classroom time mandatory. I can see that as a lot more feasible.

The other half of my reason is that I really feel the age gap of not quite 22 months between DD and DS2 was too close. For *me*. Probably because I also had a child who was 4 plus a month. I think if that had been my first two, it may have been OK, but I really feel like DS1 got "overlooked" because of the needs of the two 'babies." And that is just now starting to change as I can have a lot of fun with the older two with the same activities and the baby is getting more able to hang out with Daddy sometimes.

Also I feel like DD got pushed out of her 'baby spot.' The pregnancy definently force-night-weaned her. I do NOT want to go through that again. (It was nightmarish--literally we went from nursing OK at bedtime to *screaming furiously* because of the lack of milk overnight. It took a good 2-3 weeks for her to adjust. DH was at work at bedtime, so my parents had to come help me with her, it just was not working for her to fall asleep with me in any other way, being with me just gave her more frustration about the nursing.) And she was still a BABY. It was horrible all around.
Has anyone else felt this in their families or do I have way too much 'mama guilt?"

And after 2 this close, I'm just not quite ready to go back to pregnancy and a newborn yet.

But....by say, June 2011, my current 15 month old child would be 2 and 7 months old...by then he won't be a "baby" like DD was. He could very well be done nursing by then, and if he's like my other two, he'll likely be close to being out of diapers.
This is where DS1 was by the time DD started being active...it's like when she was a newborn, all I had to do was hold and nurse her, I could do that anytime, anywhere and still have a hand free for things like reading a book to the older one.

Is it EVERYONE that feels like maybe their oldest got shafted when the third came along? Is it that all of mine were *really young?* Cause I felt like I couldn't really do for him, my lap was literally full with DD who was not even 2 and a newborn.

Does it help to have a larger age gap when you go from 2 to 3 and upward from there?
Seriously, out of four births, the only one I suffered ppd after was the one that was 19mos after the child in front of him. It was horrible, for me. I met another mom at the pedi one day with the same gap and said how hard it had been and she said yep, that she had cried every day for the first six months!! It is hard. Or at least, it was for me. And I also felt my dd got pushed out of her baby spot (and we planned them that close, just didn't realize how hard it would be I guess). Anyway, it was an 11 year gap between one and two. A 19mos gap between two and three and a 28mo gap between three and four. The 28 mo gap worked very well for us. My youngest is now just two mos shy of being three, so obviously, if we have another, the gap will be even larger.

Guilt: something every mom has, no matter what. I use to feel guilty that my oldest was an only, now I feel guilty that his siblings have disrupted his life. I feel guilty that dd and ds2 were too close and that she gets picked on by her younger (but not smaller) brother. I feel guilty that dd doesn't have a sister. My mil told me ages ago that being a mom means feeling guilty and to get use to it, lol!!
post #54 of 88
Popping in.

It's not going well here. The prozac is working well for the PPD and I'm happy enough: I'm just recognising that yes, I have actually got my hands full. Too full?

In a nutshell, I got a phone call from school on Wednesday telling me they thought Alex had a BO problem and why haven't I made him do his handwriting practice. My answer? "What handwriting?" It turns out there's a lot that he's conveniently forgotten to mention. Isaac has decided that he hates Alex, doesn't want to share a house with him any more and would like to live with his dad instead. Skye is 4, with everything that usually goes along with that age, and River is 2, drawing on walls, throwing things when he gets frustrated (he's broken 4 mugs and 2 bowls now. This is getting silly) and winding the dog up. Then Sam will NOT be out of my arms from 6am-10pm, insists on being upright and doesn't like having his legs froggied in carriers. I think he may be a bit refluxy as well, based on the spit-up, but I don't think there's an allergy there. It's been a bit tough.
post #55 of 88
Quote:
Originally Posted by flapjack View Post
Popping in.

It's not going well here. The prozac is working well for the PPD and I'm happy enough: I'm just recognising that yes, I have actually got my hands full. Too full?

In a nutshell, I got a phone call from school on Wednesday telling me they thought Alex had a BO problem and why haven't I made him do his handwriting practice. My answer? "What handwriting?" It turns out there's a lot that he's conveniently forgotten to mention. Isaac has decided that he hates Alex, doesn't want to share a house with him any more and would like to live with his dad instead. Skye is 4, with everything that usually goes along with that age, and River is 2, drawing on walls, throwing things when he gets frustrated (he's broken 4 mugs and 2 bowls now. This is getting silly) and winding the dog up. Then Sam will NOT be out of my arms from 6am-10pm, insists on being upright and doesn't like having his legs froggied in carriers. I think he may be a bit refluxy as well, based on the spit-up, but I don't think there's an allergy there. It's been a bit tough.


I totally understand how you feel...before I homeschooled all of mine, I had many phone calls - I used to dread the phone ringing! "Where is this?" "Why hasn't your kid done this?" I just kept thinking, "Since when is it my job to do my kid's homework?:-)

I finally had to have my Alex sit down at the table each day after school and give me a detailed description of each class he had and the homework, projects, etc.!

As for everyone else - my 2 yo is doing a lot lecturing and stomping of feet - although the throwing things seems to be done and now that my 7.5 mo can crawl - he's a "little" less needy - a little!

Take a breath - or two - and remember that someday, they will be teenagers!
post #56 of 88
Helen It does get better but it took me longer each time. I do understand where you are right now. It seems that I can only see my limits in the rearview mirror. With time there is progress and adjustmens will be made.

It helps me to look at my youngest two and think about how I felt when my oldest two were that age. I though I was busy and stretched thin. Our capabilities and tolerances grow just like our love - they just take a little longer to catch up to reality.
post #57 of 88
Flapjack, all I can say is I can relate. Have I had one too many? I'm finding my guys four older ones so unpleasant these days--they are mean-spirited and weirdly screamy and yelly. Everyone is in full on competition for every last thing--from the pink plastic cup to who gets to get in the bath with the baby to who gets into the house first.

I KNOW it is because of the baby--not in the "I'm jealous" way because they all love the baby and vie for their chances to play with him, snuggle him and do things for him. Rather it is that my attention is really stretched to the max, and people aren't getting the focused attention that they need. (Not that my kids are super needy, because they aren't. But they do all need to be recognized and tended to a little every day.) Plus I'm not getting all the great positive stuff with them that I am used to and thrive on. There has been no time for a game of chess or some lego play or reading festivals. It's all the work with none of the joy-inspiring pleasures. Or at leat it seems that way right now

To top it off, DH is in Marja, Afghanistan and my Mom (who usually pitches in when DH is away for more than a couple of weeks) has been sick off and on most of this winter.

I'm feeling very, very pressed. And I'm wondering just a little if there is now so much work that I actually won't be able to enjoy each child for who they are.

Plus I'd like to work out regularly again and I don't see how that will ever happen.

Forgive me for griping and wingeing. I just really feel off my game and your post, flapjack, made me sigh in recognition.

Hope things lighten up for you soon! and for me too....
post #58 of 88
Thread Starter 
Suzie this is the place to gripe and whinge, don't worry.

Flapjack - re spit-up is it fore/hindmilk imbalance? The rest I can sympathise with but can offer no solutions other than lying down and going to sleep so you can stop thinking about it. This is what is working for me right now.

I am so bewildered at the moment that despite Amelia counting down the days to her birthday on the 18th, I haven't planned anything for her and I yelled at Jesse for still being sat on his bed gaming at 11am and not at school because I forgot it was half term. I ironed 5 school shirts late last night just to get ahead of the game......

We have had a truly terrible couple of weeks work-wise with both frantic busyness and mean, horrible clients.

The house is a mess, the fridge is empty and I'm waiting for my child tax credit to hit the bank so I can go shopping.

In better news: both my teenagers are happy and helpful at the same time.
post #59 of 88
I'm tired....lol...I should be in bed

To the one who said 28 months was a good age gap...My older 2 are 27 months apart and I thought that was MUCH better than not quite 22 months. I don't know what it was, but it was just a *lot* easier.

The consensus seems to be that I need to stop beating myself up with this guilt thing and that it probably actually *is* easier if I wait......besides, then I get to full-on-enjoy the current tiny little guy who is the light in my tunnel of the older twos' endless rivalry. (Seriously. The other day I told my friend I wished we'd never bought a TV like her because then I wouldn't have to listen to them fight over what to watch on the stupid thing. Rationally I know this would never fly by DH. And I know if it wasn't the TV, it would be what book to read or a toy or something. But still, I was ready to just kick the TV out the door.)

I think I did have a bit of PPD this time around......and maybe it's entirely understandable. 2008 was a crazy year. DD turned 1 in January. I *cried* at my first prenatal for ds2 in March, while nursing barely 14 month old DD on the table. My dad, can't explain this well, it never got a real defined diagnosis, but...the upshot is he wasn't in good health, got up one night to go to the bathroom, fell, my mom called 911, he spent from that night in late June to August 13th between a hospital and a nursing home and passed away while I was out of town. (Trust me that was a blessing, I would have gone 10 times MORE insane being alone while DH worked a night job unable to leave two sleeping kids and not able to go to the hospital that night, than I was driving home knowing....)
November 7th, DS2 was born in an amazing almost-home waterbirth (crossed state lines to a CPM who delivers in a house) BUT I had a cervical lip and I let her go with her way of trying to move it over DS2's head. I didn't prepare for what to do if that happened, didn't expect it, didn't know what other choice I might have had. It was 2 hours of painful pushing *hell* after having had 2 20-min. push babies. (And I expected this one to be EASIER than 5-hours-total-labor DD....) So to me it was traumatic even though in the end it was beautiful.

And a week before DS2 was born my beloved grandmother---who had 3 of her babies at home, including my mom--who I was so looking forward to talking to after DS2's birth--had her first heart attack. She did go back home after that, then back to the hospital the Sunday before Thanksgiving. Tuesday, I brought DS2 to meet her. She held him, talked to all of us, seemed to be doing OK, tired, but OK. Wednesday afternoon, she passed away....it was sudden...and unexpected in the way that she seemed to be doing better. There were relatives and a nurse in the room talking about transferring her out of ICU.
Ironically, she's the one I miss most crazily still....I guess because at the end, my dad couldn't speak anymore, and I know he never wanted to live that way.

And I, well, have held it all together...for my kids, for my mom, who moved in with us at the beginning of October 08--oh yeah, throw a move in there. We moved somewhere in all that!

On top of the normal just-turned 4 year old, not-quite 2 year old and then a newborn.

There's been a LOT of adjusting going on....and a *lot* of over-frustration.

Hmm when I read it all it doesn't seem all that unreal to me that I'm just now a year later beginning to feel settled in my life again. Maybe I NEED To have that feeling for awhile before I add any new element to it.

(On "cleaning house"--I'm SO GLAD nobody came over today! I hit a couple big secondhand store sales for clothes for the kids, so I had a bunch of stuff all over their room I was sorting, They had toys all over, plus the new stuff going through the washer and dryer, diaper laundry all over the couch--CLEAN diapers, but still...sink full of dishes, and a table full of playdoh mess. And the trash needed to go out.
And I NEVER STOPPED MOVING--my mom went out for a few hours and I was continually working on cleaning things up--by the time she got home, the diaper laundry was off the couch, the laundry was out of the dryer and mostly put away, and the baby was up from a nap, fed, and re-dressed. (The heck with bibs, he just eats topless!)

I don't know what I'd do if she wasn't here, she took care of the dishes and play-doh mess while I got everyone bathed because there is school tomorrow and got the last of the clothes put away. (I TRIED to get the kids to do it, no dice there, but they DID clean their toys out of the living room and the bath.) Then I got them their snack-dinner (late lunch) and put sheets on the beds. THEN FINALLY they all went to bed. And here I am lol. (DH works evenings so that leaves us at the worst time of day IMO...but it does leave me free of having to deal with a 6 PM dinner hour and trying to have a house he wants to come home to at that time.)

OH and add to that mess that we have no vacuum, a situation that I am going to try to remedy tomorrow by finding the vacuum repair/resale place my friend told me about. (The selling point for me was he works on and replaces his stuff if it doesn't work. I'm fully sick of replacing vacuum cleaners.)
post #60 of 88
Moms of Many, can I just pop in to ask what you drive? I love to read through the MOM threads but I can never seem to keep up enough to get into the threads, so I apologize for just jumping in and asking but I am really having a tough time deciding what to buy. I am pregnant with #5 (due in September) and my other kids are almost 7, 5, 3, and 16 months. I drive an Odyssey right now and I have loved it for four kids but I need something newer and I would like something with some more seating flexability if possible.

I have thought about a suburban but they are just so BIG and I really love my auto sliding doors with my kids all being so young. So what do you drive?
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