Petty issue about toddlers and crafts - Page 2

[HeatherB]

I hate stains, and I like nice kids' clothes, so I understand the difficulty.

I would suggest getting him an oversized shirt/smock/apron that he can take with him and feel like it's "his." That way, he'll be more ready to wear it (my kids would also flinch at something new like that), and it'll keep his clothes clean. I've also discovered that Crocs are good for messy situations. I never bought them before I found we needed shoes that could be messy but still protect their feet!

[Hey Mama!]

Originally Posted by kittykat2481

Around here there can be a lot of competition between mothers too - especially at groups like MOPS. Just get a big bottle of Shout Advanced (in the blue bottle) and treat the clothes as soon as you get home. Also bring an extra outfit to change him in to after he gets dirty. We've lost a few shirts to stains, but usually if I treat them immediately, I can save them. And if I can't, I just consider it a fact of life...

I was coming back to post the same thing. I attended MOPS briefly in TX and the kids looked like little fashion ad models. It was too stressful to make all three girls plus myself look top notch just to go hang out at a church.

OP, maybe pack an old t-shirt and see if the childcare staff will change him before and after the messy activity? I've done the pudding activity with 12-18 mo old toddlers and I took all their shirts off and put on bibs on them, thus saving their clothes.

[limabean]

Originally Posted by nerdymom

In defense of the OP, I know that around here, there is a certain pressure to have your baby/toddler/kids dressed nicely wherever you go, and if their clothes are stained/ripped/mismatched/faded/old/out of style, it's considered a point against your mothering skills. It's one of those unspoken things that is conveyed solely with looks and whispers behind the back. It's wrong, petty, and unrealistic, but it happens.

I'm sure that's true, but I just can't imagine letting it affect the way I dress my kids. I live in a ridiculously looks-conscious area, and when I first moved here I felt really inadequate because I don't spend lots of time on my hair in the mornings, and don't wear $200 jeans. But I got over it, and realized that I like my jeans and my hair, and I'm not going to go around feeling bad about myself over something so silly. And I've found plenty of friends, even in my superficial part of the country, who operate on my level and don't put a lot of stock into clothing labels or makeup brands.

So if I was hanging with the kind of women who would whisper about someone's kid's clothes behind their back, I'd find new friends rather than feeling pressure to dress my kids to the nines.

[waiting2bemommy]

oxyclean.

seriously.

I dress my 2 year old in lovely brand name clothes (from the clearance rack at the thrift store, but no one knows that lol) like Fubu, Rocawear, Baby Gap, and people are always shocked that I let him go to the park and roll in the mud or whatever.

I just don't see the big deal. Obviously I don't routinely dress him in a suit for playground adventures, BUT often when we are dressed up we end up going out to eat afterwards or visitng someone and he gets messy anyway. So my solution is to buy clothes that can withstand frequent washing on warm with half a bucket of oxyclean dumped in. And he still looks nice! I even resell his clothes when he outgrows them, and you'd never know he fingerpainted, made mud pies, played in moon sand etc. in them every day.

We do arts and crafts stuff ALL the time and so far the only thing I haven't been able to remove was sparkly pink nail polish (not from a project, ds found it under the bed). I can't imagine what they're doign at MOPS that is so horribly messy that it can't be reversed. If it's that major, buy a t-shirt 2 sizes up and put that on him over his clothes when you're getting dressed in the morning. That way it's not a "smock" but you'll still get soem coverage. I would be pretty pissed if someone was trying to force my kid to wear a smock and he didn't want to. It's just clothes, it's jsut paint, it's really OK. definitely not a battle worth fighting.

On a practical note, you might want to mention to them that if you put a couple drops of hand soap in the paint and shake vigorously before you turn the kids loose with it, it will easily wash off almost any surface.

[*EarthMama*]

Sorry this is off topic but is MOPS a really religious group? I know that it is Christian based but I am wondering how much of the meeting us based around religion. We just moved to an area where we don't know anyone and I would love for my toddler to be able to go to these and have fun, I just don't want to feel uncomfortable being there and not being Christian... any thoughts?

Also to add to the discussion of messy clothes, I love the idea of going to a thrift store and getting a few outfits you don't mind getting messy...

[Liberty5_3000]

I would be annoyed too if my child was coming back dirty also. His clothing is about 95% hand-me-downs, so its not nice clothes in the sense that it was expensive or anything. Our MOPs is in the morning and I'm glad I don't have to go home and change his clothes, we don't have that much clothing for him to go through multiple outfits a day. I don't get out of the house amongst other people often and the occasions that I do, I like for him to look decent, so I wouldn't want to dress him in something stained or oversized. I don't understand why they can't find enough activities that are fun without being messy, but I'd never say anything to them about it and just come home and grumble to myself because I have to do another load of laundry.

[mama2mygirl]

Originally Posted by Latte Mama

Sorry OP, I'd LOVE a deal where my toddler could do crafts with other kids and get messy and I could go off and get some adult time. I'd send him in a paper sack if need be . Echoing the PP's, send him in old gear.

I know!! This sounds like the best deal EVER.
How about hitting a thrift store? Get a few outfits only for this.

[Purple*Lotus]

Originally Posted by *EarthMama*

Sorry this is off topic but is MOPS a really religious group? I know that it is Christian based but I am wondering how much of the meeting us based around religion. We just moved to an area where we don't know anyone and I would love for my toddler to be able to go to these and have fun, I just don't want to feel uncomfortable being there and not being Christian... any thoughts?

Also to add to the discussion of messy clothes, I love the idea of going to a thrift store and getting a few outfits you don't mind getting messy...

From their website it does seem like it is a religious group.

[Tizzy]

For the side note about MOPS - it's non-denominational and they are not supposed to push religion. I know we have a lot of non-Christian's attending who feel comfortable with the program.

As the post title states, I know this is a petty issue but it's annoying nonetheless.
I don't feel a specific pressure to dress my kids up to attend, I just prefer that they are neat and tidy whenever we leave our property. I think the biggest issue why I don't send them in grubby clothes is because everyone already has the impression that we are struggling financially, but we're not. We're young parents, we drive older vehicles, work our butts off, own a farm, do things as frugally as possible in order to have a more comfortable future. If they see us wearing old clothes, they'll be instantly offering us help in various ways and we don't want them to assume we need assistance. I know there are others out there who are a LOT worse off than we are.

So I guess if it's that annoying to me I should either just stop grumbling about treating stains or send them in grubby clothes. Thanks for all the input

[pbjmama]

How much religious stuff is really dependent on the group. I've been in MOPS for awhile and there are all sorts of people at our group. And yes some of them dress up for the day but I don't and my kids wear clothes they can get dirty, as is requested by the MOPPETS program. They even request a clean set of clothes in case a child has a potty accident or something like that.

[RoadBuddy]

Kids get messy - I firmly believe that trying to keep them neat all time stifles creativity. Let the kid have fun and perhaps get some cheap sweatpants and tshirts for exactly this purpose (thrift stores are great for this if $ is really tight, otherwise places like Target have them for pretty cheap). If you're going somewhere nicer afterwords, bring normal clothes with you.

We don't do MOPS, but the programs we attend specifically request that kids come dressed for mess. If the program expects kids to dress up, then does messy activities, I'd talk to them about it. Otherwise, messy clothes are the way to go.

[limabean]

Originally Posted by Tizzy

I think the biggest issue why I don't send them in grubby clothes is because everyone already has the impression that we are struggling financially, but we're not. We're young parents, we drive older vehicles, work our butts off, own a farm, do things as frugally as possible in order to have a more comfortable future. If they see us wearing old clothes, they'll be instantly offering us help in various ways and we don't want them to assume we need assistance.

Just a quick note that the clothes you send him in don't have to be grubby or old-looking to be craft-friendly. Something as simple as jeans or cords and a dark-colored cotton shirt would work and could still look nice. Pretty much anything but a white dress shirt. And if he has a clean face, neat hair, etc., I wouldn't think anyone would get the impression that you were a paycheck away from financial ruin or anything just because he didn't have on designer duds. Kids can be dressed down for play and still be as cute as all get-out.

[Tizzy]

Usually I would agree, but his last outfit was a pair of denim overalls and a cotton plaid shirt.
I treated them as soon as we got home with oxi-clean but they both are stained with pink paint.
I have to admit, the white dress shirt was the easiest because I caved and bleached it.