help me set myself up for success with bf

[organicpapayamama]

so with my first bf didnt go well. I had a horrible LC at the hospital who didnt care to help me more than 2 min. DS would latch but the pain was horrible and I think more blood came out than milk or colostrum. The nurses gave my ds a pacifier and bottle and formula even though my birth plan said to avoid these things. By the time I got home from the hospital ds had nipple confusion. I was able to pump but never exclusively and had to supplement with formula It was getting to be too much of a hassle that I was only able to pump for 3 months. then it was straight formula.

This time around I plan to do everything different and set myself up for success. Ive made up a list of things I can do to have the best outcome possible. Id like for you mamas to please take a look and see if I could add or remove anything from my list.

Here is my list:
-Put no artificial nipples or formula on my birth plan...again
-Make signs for the room and babys cart that she is not to have any artificial nipples or formula
-try to have a med free birth
-Having baby room in with me/ co sleep
-Skin to skin contact right after birth
-delay newborn procedures
-start bf right away after birth
-stock up on some helpful herbs to boost supply
*mothers milk tea
*alfalfa tablets
*flax seed meal
*Brewers yeast (in cookies perhaps)
*Malunggay tablets
*Fenugreek
-eat foods that have been known to help in production
*papaya
*black beans
*oatmeal
-drink lots of water
-get plenty of rest
-feed on demand even through the night
-Ive hired my own LC to help once I am home from the hospital
-Ive already got the number to my local LLL group
-Got the info to my local WIC office for any breast feeding support I may need
-Lanolin cream for sore nipples
-cooling/warming packs for any engorgement or soreness

Thats all I can think of right now. I do have the pump that I had before. Its the Medela Pump in Style. I have read in a few other posts that perhaps pumping one breast while feeding from the other helps as well... do you recommend I do this from the beginning? should I let baby eat first or pump at the same time? Any other tips would be much appreciated. TIA!

[bec28]

I'm not sure if you're already planning on this or not, bu the only thing I can think of is to attend some LLL meetings before the birth if you can. I was only able to go to one before DS was born, and I'm awfully glad I did. It made it much easier for me to call one of the leaders when I needed help because I had already meet them.

Good luck!

[maddymama]

Sounds like a great list.... and I agree with bec28, go to a LLL meeting now, or call the leader now, so they will "know you" if you need help later.
Also, try very, very, very hard NOT to stress out over this. The more relaxed you are about this, the better it will go. Babies feed off of your emotions, and the more stressed over feeding you are, the harder it will be for your LO to figure it all out. I had to remind myself over and over and over again with DD2 that learning how to latch on was difficult for a newborn, and that taking an hour to learn how to latch on before each feeding was necessary at first, and it would become quick once she learned how to latch on. It did become quicker, and she latched on in seconds within the first week. AND it didn't hurt this time around.
Good luck!
~maddymama

[organicpapayamama]

thanks mamas. Ill try and attend at least one meeting before the birth, its hard because its at night and I also have a toddler that Ill have to bring with me and he doesnt do well staying up late. I already know the leader I would ask for help. I called her over the phone with help with DS but sadly I could only get phone help since its the only help that was free and at that time I was out of work and had no money. She is very nice, although Im not sure she remembers me but I will def see if I can reconnect with her.

[CalaRei]

This might be my experience with twins talking, but get yourself a nice nursing pillow. I was ready to give up trying to wrangle the weight of two babies on a floppy little Boppy pillow, and then accidentally dozing and everyone loses latch.

I've got the EZ-2-Nurse twin pillow which is *great* for me to nurse at night, because I can doze upright and they stay on - the height is key. Again, probably not necessary for you, but I have to admit that it's awesome.

During the daytime I use a "Cuddoozle" pillow, which my local LC office turned me onto. It doesn't have the side support that the EZ pillow does, but you probably won't be doing football holds all day long either. This is the one I'd suggest. More than anything, it's stupid - but it's got this great handle on the top that I can grab from sitting on the couch, and the inner part is also waterproof. One of mine spits up all the time. Waves upon waves. So this has been pretty nice to be able to just wash the cover and not have the inside all gucky.

Finally - snacks and a water bottle. I'm sure you have these, but I just want to impress the importance. Get club sizes of dried fruit, granola bars, etc. Serving sizes of everything - individually wrapped cheese, yogurt sticks - it all had to be edible with one hand. Mine fed for almost an hour every two hours. That didn't leave much time for diaper changing, pee breaks for me, AND cooking something to eat. I was ravenous, too. The water bottle is nice because sometimes it's hard to reach the table next to my couch (over the arm) to reach a glass, but a bottle with a flip top can just sit beside me.

[organicpapayamama]

Originally Posted by CalaRei

This might be my experience with twins talking, but get yourself a nice nursing pillow. I was ready to give up trying to wrangle the weight of two babies on a floppy little Boppy pillow, and then accidentally dozing and everyone loses latch.

I've got the EZ-2-Nurse twin pillow which is *great* for me to nurse at night, because I can doze upright and they stay on - the height is key. Again, probably not necessary for you, but I have to admit that it's awesome.

During the daytime I use a "Cuddoozle" pillow, which my local LC office turned me onto. It doesn't have the side support that the EZ pillow does, but you probably won't be doing football holds all day long either. This is the one I'd suggest. More than anything, it's stupid - but it's got this great handle on the top that I can grab from sitting on the couch, and the inner part is also waterproof. One of mine spits up all the time. Waves upon waves. So this has been pretty nice to be able to just wash the cover and not have the inside all gucky.

Finally - snacks and a water bottle. I'm sure you have these, but I just want to impress the importance. Get club sizes of dried fruit, granola bars, etc. Serving sizes of everything - individually wrapped cheese, yogurt sticks - it all had to be edible with one hand. Mine fed for almost an hour every two hours. That didn't leave much time for diaper changing, pee breaks for me, AND cooking something to eat. I was ravenous, too. The water bottle is nice because sometimes it's hard to reach the table next to my couch (over the arm) to reach a glass, but a bottle with a flip top can just sit beside me.

great tips! I have a boppy so we will see if I need to put something under it to bring it up a bit. Ill def have a water bottle on hand 24/7, THANKS!

[AmyKT]

If you haven't already, you might want to check the thread I started: http://www.mothering.com/discussions....php?t=1190789

I also had a really hard time with my first and only breastfed a month. The mamas who posted to this thread also had trouble the first time but went on to have more pleasant experiences with later babes.

Good luck to both of us this time!

[organicpapayamama]

Originally Posted by AmyKT

If you haven't already, you might want to check the thread I started: http://www.mothering.com/discussions....php?t=1190789

I also had a really hard time with my first and only breastfed a month. The mamas who posted to this thread also had trouble the first time but went on to have more pleasant experiences with later babes.

Good luck to both of us this time!

yes thank you I actually read through it today. Thats where I got the idea to bg and pump at the same time thanks so much!! I love MDC mamas!

[possum]

I also think getting to a LLL meeting ahead of time would be great! We attend a night meeting and my cranky-monkey-almost-3-yr-old plays better there than any other place. Maybe you'll be pleasantly surprised.
In addition, I would suggest having a support person there to help you make sure you get your wishes for your birth and PP honored - someone to stick up for you when you may need some back-up. I see you are a doula; so I bet you can get this covered.
I think getting nursing off to a good start and your commitment to BFing will be tip the scales for you.
Good luck, mama.
Melinda

[organicpapayamama]

Originally Posted by possum

I also think getting to a LLL meeting ahead of time would be great! We attend a night meeting and my cranky-monkey-almost-3-yr-old plays better there than any other place. Maybe you'll be pleasantly surprised.
In addition, I would suggest having a support person there to help you make sure you get your wishes for your birth and PP honored - someone to stick up for you when you may need some back-up. I see you are a doula; so I bet you can get this covered.
I think getting nursing off to a good start and your commitment to BFing will be tip the scales for you.
Good luck, mama.
Melinda

I wish I had the support of another person but sadly I dont. My story is long and sad but in a nut shell I decided to be a single mom by choice this time (stbx left me when i was pg with DS). No one I know, friends or family, is genuinely happy or supportive of me. I do have a doula to support me during labor and birth but sadly she cannot stay with me over night. I am facing my recovery time at the hospital by myself. This has me worried that the nursing staff may do something when i am occupied in the bathroom or shower... like give my baby artificial nipples and formula... as they did with ds.

[KristyDi]

Originally Posted by organicpapayamama

I wish I had the support of another person but sadly I dont. My story is long and sad but in a nut shell I decided to be a single mom by choice this time (stbx left me when i was pg with DS). No one I know, friends or family, is genuinely happy or supportive of me. I do have a doula to support me during labor and birth but sadly she cannot stay with me over night. I am facing my recovery time at the hospital by myself. This has me worried that the nursing staff may do something when i am occupied in the bathroom or shower... like give my baby artificial nipples and formula... as they did with ds.

That sounds tough You're a strong mama.

I think that makes connecting with LLL something that could be even more beneficial for you than it might be for a mama with more support. I know what you mean about how difficult getting to a night meeting with a toddler could be. Have you checked other LLL groups around you? I don't know what your area is like, but I live between 2 different LLL meetings that happen at different times. Maybe you could find one that works better with your schedule.

On the worry about showering and sneaky nurses, I totally didn't trust the nurse on duty when I took my 1st shower and my DH was at work (self-employed, no leave) so I took dd's bassinet into the bathroom with me. It didn't quite fit, but I left the door open with the bassinet halfway through and the door to my room closed. I would have known if anyone messed with her.

Do you babywear? Keeping your newborn attached to you is a great way to control access to her.

[organicpapayamama]

Originally Posted by KristyDi

On the worry about showering and sneaky nurses, I totally didn't trust the nurse on duty when I took my 1st shower and my DH was at work (self-employed, no leave) so I took dd's bassinet into the bathroom with me. It didn't quite fit, but I left the door open with the bassinet halfway through and the door to my room closed. I would have known if anyone messed with her.

Do you babywear? Keeping your newborn attached to you is a great way to control access to her.

I have another thread going on my ddc about just that... being in recovery by myself. My first thought would be to roll the bassinet into the bathroom with me but I dont know what the hospitals view is about this. I dont see it as a big deal as thats what Im going to do at home. But hospitals have some strange rules. Ive heard of some not allowing cosleeping and even calling CPS on moms that try to do it. Thankfully my hospital is fine with co sleeping but Im not sure about the shower thing. Ill probably bring her in with me and take a super fast shower.

I do plan to wear her. I tried with DS but I got the wrong sling that hurt my back and he turned out to be a very big boy and I couldnt carry him much...30 pounds at 6 months! But I bought some wraps that I think will be more comforting for me and baby this time around.

[buckeye_bebe]

Chill and know you can do it. Really know it, to believe it. Its what the boobs do, regardless of consultants, herbs, pillows, pacifiers. These boobs were maid for milkin', this is what they do. One of these days these boobs are going to make lots of milk for you.

[organicpapayamama]

Originally Posted by buckeye_bebe

Chill and know you can do it. Really know it, to believe it. Its what the boobs do, regardless of consultants, herbs, pillows, pacifiers. These boobs were maid for milkin', this is what they do. One of these days these boobs are going to make lots of milk for you.

thank you, I needed that. I do need to have more faith in my body. It did create, grow and nurture this baby so its more than capable of feeding her outside the womb. Thanks.

[possum]

Originally Posted by organicpapayamama

I wish I had the support of another person but sadly I dont. My story is long and sad but in a nut shell I decided to be a single mom by choice this time (stbx left me when i was pg with DS). No one I know, friends or family, is genuinely happy or supportive of me. I do have a doula to support me during labor and birth but sadly she cannot stay with me over night. I am facing my recovery time at the hospital by myself. This has me worried that the nursing staff may do something when i am occupied in the bathroom or shower... like give my baby artificial nipples and formula... as they did with ds.

That does sound like a difficult situation. I'm glad you have a doula for labor; that must be a big relief at least. I have actually met some really great ladies in my town through MDC. I wonder if you might find some support in the tribal area. And if you do find a way to get to a LLL meeting you will be able to make some connections there. Even if it doesn't help for the birth/PP, a network of like-minded moms IRL will be a great asset.
Take care,
Melinda

[GoGoGirl]

I mentioned this thread to my mom, who is an IBCLC, (ok ok, I sang her that these boobs are made for milking song ) and she made me promise to tell you this:

"The book Breastfeeding Made Simple by Nancy Mohrbacher & Kathleen Kendall-Tackett puts it all in perspective for how to create the situation where baby humans are most likely to get it right.

It's the mom's job to create the environment (eg, baby skin-to-skin on her chest) but it the *baby's* job to establish the supply and breastfeed."

And my advice is to relax and breathe, at least while you're nursing. In those first few weeks, I was so stressed out about nursing (tongue tie, baby losing weight) and I think it was making the situation worse. My mom would remind me to take lots of deep breaths, and right afterward I usually had a let down. Breathing really matters!

[kirstenb]

Just wanted to send some support your way. I had a horrible breastfeeding relationship with DS1. I had no idea what I was doing, he had nipple confusion and was completely on formula by 9 weeks because he would no longer latch on and I didn't know what to do. I vowed that it would be different this time around and it has been so much better. What helped me the most was doing my research beforehand, knowing what resources were available to me should I run into trouble, and feeding on demand. DS2 is 12 weeks now and we have a really great breastfeeding relationship. You can do this too!

[organicpapayamama]

Originally Posted by GoGoGirl

I mentioned this thread to my mom, who is an IBCLC, (ok ok, I sang her that these boobs are made for milking song ) and she made me promise to tell you this:

"The book Breastfeeding Made Simple by Nancy Mohrbacher & Kathleen Kendall-Tackett puts it all in perspective for how to create the situation where baby humans are most likely to get it right.

It's the mom's job to create the environment (eg, baby skin-to-skin on her chest) but it the *baby's* job to establish the supply and breastfeed."

And my advice is to relax and breathe, at least while you're nursing. In those first few weeks, I was so stressed out about nursing (tongue tie, baby losing weight) and I think it was making the situation worse. My mom would remind me to take lots of deep breaths, and right afterward I usually had a let down. Breathing really matters!

thank you, thats so sweet of you to pass this on.

Originally Posted by kirstenb

Just wanted to send some support your way. I had a horrible breastfeeding relationship with DS1. I had no idea what I was doing, he had nipple confusion and was completely on formula by 9 weeks because he would no longer latch on and I didn't know what to do. I vowed that it would be different this time around and it has been so much better. What helped me the most was doing my research beforehand, knowing what resources were available to me should I run into trouble, and feeding on demand. DS2 is 12 weeks now and we have a really great breastfeeding relationship. You can do this too!

Thanks for your support. Im def more informed this time around and have everything I could possibly need at my fingertips. I am going to do awesome this time!

[BabyBearsMummy]

I have not read the other replies but I have a few thoughts about what to add to your list.

1- Attend local LLL meeting early and often. There might be several different groups in your area. You might find you click better with a certain Leader or group of mums.

2- Hire a birth doula to help you plan for and empower you on your birth and breastfeeding journey. Try to get one with additional breastfeeding education and experience if possible.

3- Get a babywearing wrap and wear baby skin to skin (Mumma topless and baby in only diaper) in upright position as much as possible throughout the day. Have babies daytime napping happen in the wrap. Skin to skin nurturing has been shown to help establish and maintain milk supply

4- Spend the first few weeks at home bonding and resting as a family. The first month is crucial for establishment of milk supply. I encourage all new mums to spend as much time as possible cuddling there newborns (

[BabyBearsMummy]

hmm half my post seams to have disapeared I wish there was some way to fix that