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Originally Posted by SparklingGemini  Right. I get that drowning is awful. And that pools are considered dangerous. But what your post didn't include is what numbers of those drownings were pool related versus river/lake/ocean/bathtub/bucket etc.
I'm just stunned at the number of people would never even consider a house because it has a pool. Really? I don't know. Personally, I think its over the top to say that a pool can never be safe enough.
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I agree. We live in a house with pool...with a locked metal gate that has spikes at the top. It shuts and locks automatically, but we are vigilant about checking and double-checking. We also have a secondary lock on it. And we have latches at the top of the doors (not in kid reach, though they could get there by climbing on a chair, so it is definitely not our primary safety measure) leading out back. Our kids can't swim yet, but they've been trained on what they must do if they fall in and have practiced it with their clothes on. We do not let them come into the pool area until we are 100% ready to supervise.
We were taught by some folks in the pool industry that pool alarms often make things more dangerous because they give folks a false sense of security. I think that's true. We bought not pool alarms when we moved in, but door alarms for both the back door and the gate to the pool. I never ended up installing them, I think more than anything because I didn't want to get too comfortable. When we moved in, my kids were still at ages requiring constant supervision. We always had our eyes on them. Now they are older, but not old enough that we don't know where they are at all times. I think our gate system is great, and I think our supervision is better.
There is some risk to having a pool, like there is to many useful things. There are significant benefits, however. Our pool, for example, has a therapeutic use for our kids, who both have special needs. They really get a lot out of being able to swim multiple times per day every single day in the summer. I think with proper precaution, the benefits can outweigh the risks. But the precaution has to be there.
The one and only time we have had a problem, it has been a user error (too many adults with the kids at the pool, and I made the grave mistake of trusting that the other adults were keeping an eye on the kids when I told them I was walking over to the other side of the pool to do something...I should have verbally made sure they were watching and willing to take responsibility...I take full responsibility for not doing so...anyway, my son-- in a fight that could have been broken up-- pushed my daughter into the pool and I had to run over, dive in, and fish her out because apparently the other adults standing RIGHT NEXT TO HER couldn't think clearly enough to do that themselves). My mom was there and stood there screaming at my son instead of going after my daughter. It was even at the shallow end. That was infuriating especially because I want my son to actually get my attention if something bad happens at the pool and I am not looking for some reason...not to be too afraid to tell anyone. There was a time and a method to discipline my son around breaking the rules, but it wasn't screaming bloody murder pre-rescue. Anyway, my daughter was shaken, but fine. Still, the accident that happened could have just as easily happened at the Y or a community pool or whatever. The fact that we were by the pool wasn't because we happened to have a pool at our house. It was because we were choosing to go swimming.
So my advice to the OP is not have MIL babysit at MIL's house. The reason? First, the pool absolutely needs to be gated and locked, etc., and it doesn't sound like it is. Second, I believe pools can be safe enough to justify their benefits, but user errors prevent safety and unless she takes things very, very, very seriously and is 100% alert and cautious, a user error is too much of a possibility to outweigh the benefits.
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