Feeling discouraged - looking for some strong mama vibes

[tarasattva]

-- xposted from my DDC --

I had a beautiful hospital birth with midwives with my DD, and I always assumed this birth would be a repeat of that. Now I'm starting to have doubts.

I just got a call from one of the midwives saying I have to meet w/ one of the physicians (b/c I'm 35 and fat). This is not a big deal in and of itself, but worries me in that they are looking at me as "higher" risk than normal.

I have also been scheduled for a maternal echo cardiogram - again b/c I'm 35 and fat. This is in case I need anesthesia so that they're sure my heart is ok. Ugh, ok, I assume I won't be using anesthesia, so not a big thing (and I feel as though I should have the ECG in general - b/c of my weight and family history - I'm just worried about having it attached to my prenatal care and having it somehow lead to interventions I don't want). Obviously I need to follow up w/ my midwife about this, but does anyone know what interventions any info turned up might lead to?

I feel like my blood sugar might be out of whack. At 12 weeks my fasting sugars were 96. Above where they like to see them, but not outrageous. I'm hoping the numbers were high b/c I had a ridiculous desert the night before not realizing I would have the blood draw in the am. But now in the mornings I am feeling shaky and "weird" after eating. I called the nurse, who is finding out whether another fasting blood draw makes sense prior to the 25 week 1hr screen. I'm on the verge of going out and buying a blood glucose monitor, but to get one with good reliability and strips and pricks seems to be about $50 which I don't really have to spend.

Lastly, some blood work I had several weeks back showed lower than normal levels of ue3, which at the values they found indicates an increased risk of fetal growth restriction and possibly the need for early delivery. This one scares the crap outta me. It's an increased risk, not a diagnosis, but I am really worried about my little guy. Clearly his health and well-being outweigh any wishes for a certain type of birth, but I also realize that an early delivery (likely ending up in C-section) has it's own risks. I'm scared of being diagnosed w/ FGR and even more scared about making the right decision about when to birth him to give him the best chances. I feel out of my element here and at the doctor's mercy. Third tri weight estimates (even by U/S) are notoriously off base, how will we know if this little one is growing the way he should????(Obviously some reading/research is in order!).



Wow that was quite the emotional dump - clearly I needed to get these thoughts outside of my head.

Obviously if anyone has any input on the actual info above I'd love to hear it, but honestly even just some strong-mama, we're made to do this, your body knows what to do, you are capable of this vibes would go a long way to putting me back on the right path.

Thanks!

[RedOakMomma]

[yippiehippie]

Have you thought about looking into another midwife? It seems silly to make you go through all these tests, it is just stressing you out, doing more harm than good (though i'm no expert)! A mama should be able to trust her own body, at least to an extent!
Sorry you have to go through all this

[akcowgirl]

I am sorry you are going through so much stress on top of everything else.

[lunarlady]

It seems silly to me to make you do all those tests just because you're overweight. If there are other issues (like you feeling shaky) then sure, do the tests. But really, didn't ancient people like their women round because they had a better chance of bearing healthy babies? Something about plenty to nurture the pregnancy in times of famine?

I would say consider finding another midwife or OB who will make you feel like you should during your pregnancy -- strong, nurturing, and cared for.

[Realrellim]

You should be able to get a blood glucose monitor for close to free if you look online for coupons and such. The thing that's most pricey are the test strips, but it's also true that if you discover your readings are showing elevated levels, you can tell your midwives and they can write you a prescription for the strips so your insurance helps to cover that cost. In your situation, it would be worth it just to know what's going on blood-sugar wise.

As far as FGR: being at increased risk means nothing concrete. Or let's put it this way: I don't have risk factors for gestational diabetes other than being 35, but I have it anyhow (despite decreased risks). Having an increased risk doesn't make it happen; having a decreased risk doesn't prevent something from happening.

Have you asked your midwife what their plans are for monitoring growth, if any? Here is what I've been experiencing: I have a growth-restricted baby last time (unexpectedly), so this time I've had a scan around 12-ish weeks, one at 19, one at 24, one at 29, and one is scheduled next week (32 weeks). The useful part is that we've been able to keep an eye on growth and uterine blood flow. My baby has been dropping percentile-wise since 19 weeks, which isn't concerning them yet because I'm small (even despite a 12th percentile measurement at 29 weeks). If the babe measures smaller next week, they told me they'll check uterine blood flow and if that's good they'll just keep an eye on it.

The thing that has been really useful to me is that they've been keeping an eye on this the whole time, so there's a basis for my decision--including the fact that growth has been reliably dropping and isn't a figment of the dr's imagination.

Hopefully yours will simply remain a risk and not a reality though.

[JTA Mom]

For the 'shakey' feeling, have you thought of going on a GD diet anyways? It's really healthy. I've also heard that there's a monitor at Walmart for around $5.

Also, keep a food/feeling log. Log what you eat, then, whether you feel sluggish, shakey/etc. You might see that some foods are just plain bad for you. I can eat white bread with butter in the morning and feel a bit sleepy, but fine an hour later. If I have a bowl of oatmeal, cooked in coconut milk with nuts in it, within an hour I have the 'shakes'. I just don't process oatmeal well at all. No matter how it's prepared.

As for your heart, you mentioned family history--that's why they are tacking that on. And it's good to know how your heart looks now--it's a baseline of sorts.


As for the protein thing, I agree with a pp. Increase risk does not = you will have it. Just that the doctor/midwife needs to keep that in mind throughout your care.

To give you an example, I developed pre-e with ds2. My blood pressure spiked to 140/90. I am overweight (obese actually), which is an increased risk factor. Because of that, my doctor ordered a 24hr urine test, even though my 'dips' weren't measuring any protein (I was well hydrated). I was spilling protein. Something dangerous was bypassed due to her being more 'watchful'.

It's not always fun--I was tested 3 times for diabetes because my 'numbers' were in the higher range but NOT in the bad range. Never developed it but due to my weight the doctor was obsessive about it.

Ami