Baby scared in the car. At night only.

[CanBoo]

Who else has dealt with that?

Nothing seems to work for me. Would love a fairy with a magic wand to show us what to do...

Here's the story. Unlike DD1, my 8 months old loves the car during daytime. She looks outside, babbles, giggles with her sister and sleeps in her seat as needed. I think we could drive for hours and she would still be happy.

However, as soon as it gets dark, she becomes totally different. Totally freaks out in the car seat

- We've been reducing night driving as much we could just to make it more bearable for everyone. We've even requested family members to change some family dinners to a lunch just so we don't drive 45 minutes with a screaming baby.
- Tried to turn on a light, but it doesn't seem to change anything.
- I sat at the back and made funny faces, but that doesn't work either. (our car is a Mazda5. It has two bucket middle seats where the girls sit and I have to sit at the very back when I do that. Cannot sit right beside her unfortunately.)
- Quiet music and toys don't seem to work either.
- And stopping to calm her down doesn't change anything. Because as soon as we get going again, she starts screaming, so this solution just seems to make the experience longer and even more painful.

It is bad enough, that I prefer to abandon many evening outings and meetings.

Any ideas to share?

[brooklynbabymama]

a dvd player made a world of difference for dd! ds hates the car too and especially at night...we stick a little flashlight in the headrest shining back over him, but it barely helps. so

[FiveLittleMonkeys]

We also have this problem with our 8 mo DS. We've found that if we have the light on from the beginning, and if he has someone sitting beside him (we have a minivan and we moved our captains chairs beside each other in order to do this) and if he has his soft and silky blanket/Sophie the Giraffe/other fave toy, we can usually get where we need to go without too many tears.

But like you, I try to avoid driving at night if I can possibly help it. It's awful!!

[Mamabeakley]

DD hates the car at all times, but nighttime was worse for a while. What *seems-cross-my-fingers-it-keeps-working* to have worked is moving her carseat to the back bench seat so I can sit next to her and nurse (everybody buckled in). I'm pretty sure you could do that in the 5 (we have an MPV). Once she got so she was comfy that way we added a spinny light thing - it's not meant as a baby toy but it's a wand with a globe on the end with spinning LED flashing lights. She loves that thing, and most of the time will go right to sleep for it. Also, a disposable dipe is required if I can't be back there w/her - We are hardcore cloth people but she HATES being wet and even a fleece pocket diaper isn't good enough.

We did have one "bad" day recently - I think she had gas or something. But mostly it's been MUCH better since we moved the seat & I started nursing her in her seat whenever possible + the spinny thing.

[kdescalzi]

Right there with you...our dd is 8mo and hates the car all the time but nightime is worse. We use a little Winney the Pooh stuffed toy that plays lullabys as well as lights up. There are a few light up soft toys at places like toysrus which might help. Good luck.

[CanBoo]

Thanks for your ideas. Sounds like I might move the seat at he very back on those occasional nights where I *have* to go. I'll try it when DD1 is not there. Because she's gonna whine how unfair it is that her sister gets to ride at the very back

I used to nurse dd1 in her car seat, because she hated the car any time. I thought I could avoid it, but it looks like my only hope right now.

I'll find some king of lighted toy too... I had not thought of that.

[Shanelovr]

ds did this for a long time, it took us a while to figure out why he was crying so much when we would drive home. what we got was a bright poppup light, the kind that sticks anywhere(ie to the wall, ceiling), and we turned it on as soon as we got in the car, we also turned the mp3 on to some of his favorite soothing songs. he would usually stay calm just long enough to get home-about a half hour. i know this might sound weird, but i also started sitting in the front w/ dh. i found that as long as he knew we were there, he was content. but if he could see us, he took that as a sign that he was getting out of his seat and if we didn't hold him and pick him up, he'd go ballistic.

[wombatclay]

Dd1 never minded the carseat, dd2 always hated the carseat... DS is 5.5mo and hates it at night, loves it by day.

We got a gizmo at target that seems to help...it's a mirror with animals around it. The animals light up and the whole thing plays music. It's pretty bad music, and an extremely "un-crunchy" toy (designed I think for a crib side?), but we set it up so ds can see it from his seat. We have an outback with all three car seats side by side so there is no room for anyone else... dd1 pushes the buttons on ds's light/music toy when it's dark, and takls to him/makes faces at him.

IF I nurse him into drowsy happiness before a trip in the dark, and IF dd1 starts the light/music show as soon as she is fastened in, and IF we all keep singing and talking and involving DS by name.... then he is fussy but not hysterical nine times out of ten. But if any of those conditions aren't met (say he seems ok so dd1 doesn't start the light/music gadget) he generally melts down into heart rending sobs. This winter has been hard since it was getting dark between 3-4pm for a while. It's getting better, but we still have some "after dark" drives we can't get out of.

I hope the sunnier season helps, and I'm going to be borrowing some ideas from this thread! I wish we had a bigger vehicle so dh or I could sit next to DS!

[Mya's Mommy]

My DD (8 months) is the exact same, great in the car in the daytime but when it is even starting to get dark- screams! I have found putting the light on for her works some times, but not always. Then when driving once I had an empty Starbucks cup with ice in it and started shaking it and she was quiet, I had to shake it the whole way home, but it worked. I usually get a latte and an ice water when out and about with DD, so I usually have an ice cup on hand, although we really just don't go out at night that often...