Am I being misled? Clue me in, money-savvy ones! - Page 2

[choli]

You should make sure you actually see the paperwork from the appraisal yourself, and any other documentation relating to the mortgage and HELOC. I'd ask for documentation about any debt he has incurred as well. Once you know for sure that what he is telling you is the truth, you would probably come out best to take the $10,000. It sucks, but that is the legal situation. Then make sure to get everytihing in writing.

[mattemma04]

Let him know you will be looking over everything and may reconsider his offer.10k isn't the best,but it will tide you over for a little.Dragging things out in court really stinks.When I seperated it seemed like my lawyer and dh's dragged things out behind closed doors while dh and I sat outside writing checks to pay for all the fees.

Just make sure you get your name off all debts.

[SleeplessMommy]

Originally Posted by darien

OP here. Wonder of wonders, stbx brought the issue up today. He got back the appraisal for the refi. He said that it looked like we would be getting about $40,000 back-- so, $20,000 each.
Then he says, "But if I give you that much, I won't be able to pay the mortgage. I can maybe give you $10,000." ...

It sounds like he is proposing to do a cash-out refinance on the house, taking out $40K. And the bank will give him that?

On the other hand, you believe the house to be not sell-able in the current market. It will be well worth your time to talk with 1-3 real estate agents. What would they list the house at today? What would they expect it to sell for? How long could it be expected to take to sell? How much equity is really in the house??? (FYI - divorcing people selling a house in a soft real estate market can get ugly really fast. There could be an offer you want to accept, which he refuses in order to spite you.)

I think the divorce financial planner would be well worth your while. (And you need a lawyer also... even if it leaves you totally broke.) Taking the $10K offer from the EX could be a good idea IF you can get your name off the credit card debt AND the house AND make sure you will get child support... for example some of the cash out from the house could go into escrow for child support payments.

My sympathy for having such and annoying ex.

[darien]

Originally Posted by SleeplessMommy

I think the divorce financial planner would be well worth your while. (And you need a lawyer also... even if it leaves you totally broke.) Taking the $10K offer from the EX could be a good idea IF you can get your name off the credit card debt AND the house AND make sure you will get child support... for example some of the cash out from the house could go into escrow for child support payments.

My sympathy for having such and annoying ex.

Thank you for the sympathy.

I'm already totally broke. We literally have no savings of any kind.

My name has never been on the cc's-- he took them all out in his name and without my knowledge. My name is on the heloc-- which he largely used on himself, not home improvements.

I have met with a few realtors, whom I trust, and they all thought the house wouldn't sell. The market here is just dead, and our house is not as good a value as other houses in the neighborhood. We'd be lucky to break even, and it could take forever.

[SleeplessMommy]

Originally Posted by darien

I have met with a few realtors, whom I trust, and they all thought the house wouldn't sell. The market here is just dead, and our house is not as good a value as other houses in the neighborhood. We'd be lucky to break even, and it could take forever.

this is the part that does not make sense... the house would (if a miracle happened) sell for what you need to pay off mortgage + heloc + 7% closing costs (realtor fees). Yet ex claims he can get a refi
(100% refi???) and have $40K cash out. Does not add up. Personally, I would take any deal to get rid of a deadbeat husband AND get my name off of the unsellable real estate at the same time. $10K thrown in would be great, if you got both of the above.

nak