I will probably raise a few hackles, even on this forum, as I am sure many of you have children in school activity programs and extracurricular clubs.
Our neighbors up the road stopped by on Sunday. Their 10 year old son is selling frozen cookie dough & cinnamon rolls to raise money for his public school's ASB program.
This child is special needs (though his parents never mention this, it is obvious) and was, quite frankly, scared of having to do his sales pitch. He knows us, quite well (he, his older brother and ds frequently play together), but could barely speak above a whisper and had no idea of what he was supposed to say.
His Dad kept saying, "You have to do this so that your class will win!" If their class sells enough, they get a pizza party (oh, THAT's a good use of funds raised
). (((Don't even get me started on the Dad's attitude!)))
I couldn't stand seeing the absolute fear in the little boys face and immediately said we'd buy something and let ds choose whatever he wanted (cinnamon rolls at $15 for a box
). The kid looked so relieved and just handed me the order form to complete.
I hate that the schools make the children sell stuff (and that the parents agree to this fundraising blackmail)! It isn't right to put your friends and relatives on the spot, basically forcing them to support their child and their child's school (or, club or whatever).
Especially when they know we homeschool and that ds does not benefit from these fundraisers. Plus, they are "safe" from any type of reciprocity as our son doesn't go looking for money to help with his "extra-curricular or educational" opportunities (though, wouldn't it be tempting to do so, just to see the looks on their faces!
).
I swore, after we were "hit" by his older brother last year (for the same frozen crap), that I wouldn't do it ever again. I don't like being forced into confrontations, especially with a child. Trying to tell children that you don't support their well-intention efforts is horrible. (((Thank goodness we live out in the country and don't have to deal with trick-or-treaters for UNICEF)))
But, the look on this munchkin's face provoked me into pulling out the cash. I was very kind and gentle with him, asking questions I thought he could probably answer from the order sheet in his hand but, alas, it wasn't to be. He could not tell me how much something cost, nor when the stuff would arrive, could not fill-out a receipt, could not tell me how much to pay him and could not make change for a $20.
And, all the while, his Dad is just standing there, telling him he has to do this, it isn't fair to the other children in his class if he doesn't. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
I wanted to ask how, exactly, the funds raised would be used. But, the poor kid was already so stressed, I knew I wouldn't get any answers. And, Dad, well, Dad looked like he just wanted to get going. Sigh............
Over the years, dh has been "hit" at work by children's parents (his co-workers) selling mints, cookies, coupon books, doughnuts, candy bars, and other cheap stuff, all in the name of their kid's school activities (gymnastics, band, ASB, sports), scouting group or judo/karate clubs. He's always opened his wallet and given freely.
We don't fault the children, they really have no say in this. They are told that this is what they will do, fed a line about pizza party rewards and sent out to the trenches (with veiled threats about how not selling enough is letting everyone down).
My question is why do the parents allow their children to be party to this type of blackmail and, in so many cases, actively participate in the act???
Even worse are the kids being sent out to solicit for charities (UNICEF, Haiti relief, etc). We choose which charities we want to support, and give a lot of money to those. But, when a small child asks you to help the victims of the earthquake in Haiti, what are you supposed to say? Even though you may have already given to another charity that is doing something there (and you say this), it sounds like you are blowing them off and don't care for their cause.
Sigh, just wanted to rant a little. I guess that, sometime within the next month or so (since I never did find out when the frozen globs of commercial dough will arrive), we'll have the child and, probably (this time), Mom delivering the goods. Child will be in a better frame of mind as the pressure to sell will be off his little back and he might even smile.
I really hate this, especially knowing that it never ends.
Our neighbors up the road stopped by on Sunday. Their 10 year old son is selling frozen cookie dough & cinnamon rolls to raise money for his public school's ASB program.
This child is special needs (though his parents never mention this, it is obvious) and was, quite frankly, scared of having to do his sales pitch. He knows us, quite well (he, his older brother and ds frequently play together), but could barely speak above a whisper and had no idea of what he was supposed to say.
His Dad kept saying, "You have to do this so that your class will win!" If their class sells enough, they get a pizza party (oh, THAT's a good use of funds raised
). (((Don't even get me started on the Dad's attitude!)))I couldn't stand seeing the absolute fear in the little boys face and immediately said we'd buy something and let ds choose whatever he wanted (cinnamon rolls at $15 for a box
). The kid looked so relieved and just handed me the order form to complete.I hate that the schools make the children sell stuff (and that the parents agree to this fundraising blackmail)! It isn't right to put your friends and relatives on the spot, basically forcing them to support their child and their child's school (or, club or whatever).
Especially when they know we homeschool and that ds does not benefit from these fundraisers. Plus, they are "safe" from any type of reciprocity as our son doesn't go looking for money to help with his "extra-curricular or educational" opportunities (though, wouldn't it be tempting to do so, just to see the looks on their faces!
).I swore, after we were "hit" by his older brother last year (for the same frozen crap), that I wouldn't do it ever again. I don't like being forced into confrontations, especially with a child. Trying to tell children that you don't support their well-intention efforts is horrible. (((Thank goodness we live out in the country and don't have to deal with trick-or-treaters for UNICEF)))
But, the look on this munchkin's face provoked me into pulling out the cash. I was very kind and gentle with him, asking questions I thought he could probably answer from the order sheet in his hand but, alas, it wasn't to be. He could not tell me how much something cost, nor when the stuff would arrive, could not fill-out a receipt, could not tell me how much to pay him and could not make change for a $20.
And, all the while, his Dad is just standing there, telling him he has to do this, it isn't fair to the other children in his class if he doesn't. Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
I wanted to ask how, exactly, the funds raised would be used. But, the poor kid was already so stressed, I knew I wouldn't get any answers. And, Dad, well, Dad looked like he just wanted to get going. Sigh............
Over the years, dh has been "hit" at work by children's parents (his co-workers) selling mints, cookies, coupon books, doughnuts, candy bars, and other cheap stuff, all in the name of their kid's school activities (gymnastics, band, ASB, sports), scouting group or judo/karate clubs. He's always opened his wallet and given freely.
We don't fault the children, they really have no say in this. They are told that this is what they will do, fed a line about pizza party rewards and sent out to the trenches (with veiled threats about how not selling enough is letting everyone down).
My question is why do the parents allow their children to be party to this type of blackmail and, in so many cases, actively participate in the act???
Even worse are the kids being sent out to solicit for charities (UNICEF, Haiti relief, etc). We choose which charities we want to support, and give a lot of money to those. But, when a small child asks you to help the victims of the earthquake in Haiti, what are you supposed to say? Even though you may have already given to another charity that is doing something there (and you say this), it sounds like you are blowing them off and don't care for their cause.
Sigh, just wanted to rant a little. I guess that, sometime within the next month or so (since I never did find out when the frozen globs of commercial dough will arrive), we'll have the child and, probably (this time), Mom delivering the goods. Child will be in a better frame of mind as the pressure to sell will be off his little back and he might even smile.
I really hate this, especially knowing that it never ends.
My cousin's kid felt such empathy for the people struck by Haiti that he took on collecting on his own.
