Does my 7 month old need a bedtime?

[femalephish]

We just hang out until sometime between 830-1030pm. When she starts to look/seem fussy and/or rubbing her eyes, or I just 'sense it', I see if she will nurse. If not, more playing/snuggling/hanging out. Otherwise she'll nurse to sleep. Once she's asleep I put her in her swing if it's closer to 830 or just carry her upstairs to bed with me if it's closer to 1030.

Eventually she will need a bedtime, right? I don't understand what people do to enforce that, though. I can't MAKE her nurse or MAKE her fall asleep. Will it be harder for me to get her into a bedtime once she's older? What do you do? Am I doing alright, Mamas?

[tzs]

we don't need to get up at a certain time in the am so i don't have one for my babe. she really makes her own, like you said, and it's usually around the same time (9 ish.) if she had to get up early if i worked i would maybe be more proactive. you can really tell that they need a certain amount of sleep, i mean, if we go to bed later she really does sleep later. so i wouldn't want her going to bed later if we had a set wake time.
when she's older i would have one though, just for routine and stability

[LindsC]

We don't have a "set" bedtime for DD (7 months), but I try to have her down by 8pm just because we get up at 6:45am to leave for daycare/work. Most nights she is out by that time or earlier, but the odd night, like tonight, she was up until after 9pm. Like you said, you can't make them nurse/go to sleep if they don't want to.

[jildez]

huh! I was wondering about this myself just a few days ago.

Basically evenings with my seven mth old son look the same as what you all said. I have to admit, we usually take him up to our bedroom around 8 and try to start "winding him down" and hope for sleep between 830 and 9,but last night, he slept for about an hour and then was up for 2 more . The weirdest thing- it seems like when he sleeps MORE during the day he goes down more easily and closer to when we would like.

[lifeguard]

Sounds like what you're doing is working for you.

[mckittre]

They don't need a bedtime until they need a bedtime. I didn't have one for my son until he was around 11 months old. At that point I found he would take naps too late in the evening, be crazy at midnight, and hard to wind down. So I stopped letting him nap after 6PM, and started putting him to sleep (story then nursing) at 9:30. Before that, he never had any sort of routine. But once he needed one, he fell into it easily. Playing it by ear is the way to go, I think.

[Mya's Mommy]

I guess I am the odd mama out- My 8 month old goes to bed around 7:00pm every night. We have her wind down routine starting around 6:00pm- bath, baby massage, book, calming music, and then nurse her to sleep in my bed. Then once she falls asleep I sneak out of the room and have the evening to myself with DH. It works quite well for us. It doesn't ALWAYS work though, here and there she just won't sleep, so we bring her back out with us but keep the lights low and calming music on. Whatever works for you is fine though. I just find I NEED that light at the end of the tunnel when I can have some ME time.

[ER RN Mom]

We started with a bedtime once I started back to work. We did bath time, then breast (or bottle when I worked evenings), then bed. Then, once she was weening, switched the order to bottle (now cup), bath, story time, bed. The routine starts at 7p,, she is in bed by 730 or 8. We get up at 530, so the early bedtime is a must. Plus, it's nice to have our evenings together.

Even when I'm off work or on a vacation, we stick to the routine. I think it helps her to stay on the same schedule.

[Abraisme]

My DD has a pretty regular bedtime around 7:30-8:00pm. From 0-3mo she went to bed at 10:30pm every night, then I slowly tried to push her bedtime back until it was somewhere around 8:00. Now she's in a pretty normal routine (she's 6mo) where she's tired at that time every night. It is important to me to have all the kids asleep by 8:30 so that DH and I can have a little snuggle time.

However, I didn't "force" anything that didn't come pretty naturally. I simply started making it really dark a little earlier each night. Slowly her schedule changed to accomodate that. I also make sure she takes her last nap at a decent time or I'll cut it a little short if it's too late in the day.

I really don't think that a bedtime is important to the development of your baby. If it works for you, it's perfectly fine to have a flexible bedtime.

[allical1284]

DD is 9.5 months now, and we do the same! I'm a SAHM, so we don't have to be up at a certain time. We just follow her cues at night same as you guys. It is nice because she gets to spend more time with DH who doesn't get home from work until 6-6:15 every evening.
You can't go wrong with a happy momma and happy baby

[tracymom1]

Every family is different and some babies and children thrive on having a routine while others fight it tooth and nail. As long as you and LO are happy and well-rested, why change things?

In my case, I was letting DD 'decide' her own bedtime for a while and more often than not she would end up being overtired and cranky when I went to try to get her down. Now we have an established bedtime and routine and it has made our lives so much simpler and easy. She wakes frequently at night for feedings, but at 7:30 she happily goes to sleep and stays asleep for several hours. It took a few weeks worth of nursing, rocking and snuggles before she adjusted but now she is much happier.

Whatever works is best!

[eli's mama]

My 7 month old goes to bed around 7 every night. I have 2 older kids and it's easier to have everyone on the same schedule. Though she never really fought it, if she didn't seem tired or able to wind down I would try to just keep her quiet, but as soon as it's dark she just kinda falls asleep.

[jojobee]

We do have a bedtime but she set it for us. My 10 moth old goes to bed between 6:30 and 7 most nights. She is generally just too miserable to stay up later....fussing, rubbing eyes, pulling ears etc. So we try to get her into bed before those things occur and that just happens to be around 7. It works for us!

[birthangeldoula]

DD has had a bedtime for as long as I can remember... We started out from the beginning having a bedtime routine. At 7:30 she gets a bath, then she gets lotioned and massaged, put in her sleepsack, has her final feeding and then is in her crib to sleep. Now she's usually asleep by 8:15. That's how it is now at 11 months. Of course it varied when she was younger, but we always kept the same 7:30 routine. Whether or not she went to sleep afterwards varied at 7 months, but nowadays she's asleep around 8 pm.

[Laur318]

7:30-8:30 here (10mos)
you're doing great. its the routine that works, not the time! babies don't have watches!

[Kelly1101]

We have a bedtime for my 9.5mo, it's about 9:30-10:00 pm. At 9 we pick up the toys, do story time, then put on a night-time diaper, and get in the bed. She'll nurse, and then we'll lay there until she falls asleep. She sleeps on her belly and will suck her thumb to get herself all the way to sleep, if the nursing didn't do it. Sometimes I'll fall asleep then, too, every once in a while I'll get back up for a while and get a few more things done before my own bedtime.

We've only been doing this the past month or two, when she seemed to start needing some structure. I think at about 7 months her sleeping was so erratic that we did what you're doing, OP. But somewhere in there her sleep patterns leveled out and she really does well now having a structured bedtime, and sleeps through the night until about 8 am (although occasionally waking up once or twice to nurse or suck her thumb back down, but we co-sleep so that's no big deal).

[SeekingJoy]

Originally Posted by jildez

huh! I was wondering about this myself just a few days ago.

Basically evenings with my seven mth old son look the same as what you all said. I have to admit, we usually take him up to our bedroom around 8 and try to start "winding him down" and hope for sleep between 830 and 9,but last night, he slept for about an hour and then was up for 2 more . The weirdest thing- it seems like when he sleeps MORE during the day he goes down more easily and closer to when we would like.

It makes sense! Have you read Sleepless in America? It talks about the role cortisol plays in sleep problems. Essentially, sleep begets sleep.

[Shy0717]

For the longest time ds made his own schedule and it worked for us so I went with it. The change started because ds was having a hard time staying asleep at night (up every hour and just restless). We took some tips from the No Cry Sleep Solution and made our routine more predictable and it worked. I realized that ds NEEDS that routine and structure. I try to get him settled around 7:30-8:30 ish depending on how he's doing. It's also helped his naps during the day as well. I would go with whatever works for you guys. I did a lot of experimenting with ds' routine. Some things worked, others not so much lol.

[lexmas]

didn't read the other answers, but neither dd or ds has a bedtime. They go to bed when they're tired, or when we go to bed. That's usually somewhere between 8:30 and 10, but sometimes as late as midnight. They seem perfectly happy and healthy so far. I actually like our lack of a schedule, it makes it easy to do fun things out of the ordinary, since they just sleep where and when they need to sleep. DS can STILL sleep in a sling if need be, at over 3. So I vote, whatever works for you!

[Jayray]

My 8 mo DS goes to bed sometime between 6 and 7 depending on what time and how long his afternoon nap was. He is usually tired by then. I have read that having a consistent bedtime is good for them--but more important when they're older. I personally find that DS sleeps longer when he's put down earlier--he basically wakes up around the same time every morning no matter what time he goes down. So he might as well go down early!