Need to vent, sad about Aunts baby - Page 3

[Polliwog]

I would call CPS and voice your concern. I've had foster babies who's mothers have had lots of in home services put in place to try and prevent disruption. I think if you wait, things could get really bad and removal might take place.

[Polliwog]

About the grayness. Is the baby part (or all) African American? If so, that might expain the coloring (especially if you aren't familiar with babies.) AA and biracial babies are often born really light and gradually darken. Some biracial babies skin can look sort of gray if you aren't expecting it.

[mamadebug]

I would tread lightly with the idea of calling CPS. It may be warranted at some point, but from what you have written, it seems like there are other options to pursue before doing that. It sounds like she has a safety net of medical professionals and a present family. Is there any way someone in your family can contact the nurse who does the weekly visits and express your concerns? It would be great to have an ongoing dialogue with that person. It sounds like your aunt is limited and may not always make good choices. But, having lots of people behind her helping her learn how to correctly handle different parenting situations is such a better alternative to having CPS involved. Good luck - it must be hard to watch.

[Xavismom]

Originally Posted by Polliwog

About the grayness. Is the baby part (or all) African American? If so, that might expain the coloring (especially if you aren't familiar with babies.) AA and biracial babies are often born really light and gradually darken. Some biracial babies skin can look sort of gray if you aren't expecting it.

No, her baby is not biracial, its my DS that is part Japanese (from my DH).

Our family is German, and her husband has blond hair/blue eyes, so the baby is a lot lighter than my DS, and so I was thinking maybe that accounts for the tone? IDK honestly.

I invited her over again this next week. Unfortunately I cant go to her bc DH and I share a car

[Linda on the move]

Originally Posted by Xavismom

Our family is German, and her husband has blond hair/blue eyes, (

the way your other posts came across, I assumed she was a single mother.

Whats the scoop with dad? How involved is he?

[Grace and Granola]

Hey OP...I just wanted to say that your first post struck me because when I had ds1 I was nursing him and he didn't poop and he wasn't gaining weight. The doctor recommended some pear juice, yes at about 2wks old, and it did nothing. It took several weeks to realize that I actually wasn't producing enough milk. So, of course he wasn't gaining weight, and of course he wasn't pooping. He wasn't getting enough to eat. So, in your aunt's case, I'm wondering if all this pooping business has taken her off track. If she's feeding alot of juice and pedialyte BEFORE the formula, perhaps the baby is just not getting enough to eat. Is there some way you or your mom, aunt, whoever, can mention that a baby at that age "should" be eating around X ounces of formula per day. (That information can be found online.) If that's the problem, it is easily solved. Maybe when you offer your BM to her, you could say, "Two month olds usually eat about X ounce per day, and I have X amount extra, would that help?"

to you, it sounds like a very hard situation

[Xavismom]

Originally Posted by Linda on the move

the way your other posts came across, I assumed she was a single mother.

Whats the scoop with dad? How involved is he?

He is not involved AT ALL with ANYTHING

They still live together, even though they both threaten divorce to each other constantly. He refuses to get a job. Someone offered him a job at a fast food place while she was preg, and he turned it down bc it wasnt 'good enough' for him. He is in a band, and leaves my Aunt alone all the time to go practice, even though he knows she needs constant care and help. He went out drinking the night their DD was born. He yells at her, calls her fat, all kinds of mean things.

She says he does not help out at all with their DD, to do ANYTHING. Aunt actually moved a bed into DD's room and sleeps there now, which I think is prob better for DD anyhow. Aunt is against CIO, and DD can only fall asleep with Aunt, so she cant sleep with her husband bc he smokes/drinks/ doesnt care about CIO etc.

Well all know even though he yells at her and threatens to divorce her, he is not going anywhere bc she is his free ticket to not working. My Aunt would NEVER have put up with this BS before her incident but she is fragile and scared to be alone now

Allthough she did tell me that DD's birth made her feel more powerfull and closer to the person she used to be, she said she hopes it makes her feel strong again so she doesnt need him. So far she's still putting up with him though.

[Xavismom]

Originally Posted by Heatherb917

Maybe when you offer your BM to her, you could say, "Two month olds usually eat about X ounce per day, and I have X amount extra, would that help?"

That is a very good idea, thanks!!