My 3 1/2 yo. DS loves to push boundaries and test limits. At home he is constantly testing me to find out how firm the boundary is and where exactly the boundary starts. Behaviours include screaming at the cat or baby (6 mo), refusing to cooperate with ANYTHING and poking/wrestling with the baby. I know a lot of these behavious are fairly standard for that age, but I know plenty of other kids his age that are much less persistent and less intense. What I am really concerned about is that when we are out at playgroups and classes he picks on other children, especially those smaller than him and won't leave them alone. He gets right in their face, pokes, pushes and sometimes slaps. Usually its not that aggressive as he is doing it fairly gently, not trying to hurt, just looking for a reaction. He does this behaviour interspersed with normal playtime so its not 100% of the time we are there but its enough that I can't take my eyes off of him! I beleive he is once again testing boundaries, seeing what he can get away with. Last week we left music class early because he was poking a baby so I asked him to keep his hands to himself or we will have to go home. He then gave that baby a slap in the face (not hard, but still!) so I grabbed him and said we are leaving. I was quite angry as my patience was very short (I am up 5-6 times a night with baby) but maintained my cool enough to fairly calmly get ready to go and get into the car, with a stern talk in the car and warnings that we will not be able to do fun things when he behaves like that. I think it had some impact on him because he talked about how they couldn't sing the goodbye song to him etc. The next class he didn't poke or slap, but instead he pushed. A different child this time. So his behaviour didn't actually improve, he just found another way to be pushy! Today at a playgroup he was standing in front of/blocking kids, pushing them with his feet (at bottom of slide) and refusing to share (he knows how normally). He was ok when focused on playdough but otherwise it was just non-stop bothering children. By the time we left I was feeling so stressed out and anxious. He is going through a particularily challenging period right now. My husband and I are exhaused after bedtime routine!! He is sleeping well and eating fairly well and has a stable, loving homelife with plenty of routine and loving attention. He has 2 afternoons a week with grandparents and otherwise he is always with me. I don't know what to do! He is generally very very active and also quite smart and so bores easily. Its exhausting! Should I talk to a professional at this point? Any suggestions? I have read "Raising your spirited child" and loved it. It has helped a little, but I still don't know how to handle certain situations with this incredibly persistent child.
Thank you!
Thank you!
