Discipline & 1yo - Page 4

[alegna]

Originally Posted by crunchy_mommy

Thanks! I tried cartoons once when he was sick (not really a fan of them but I thought I'd try it) but he didn't seem too into them. He has a million toys and he likes the ones that make music so maybe I should keep more of those nearby. I do think he'd like the sand & water I'm trying to get DH to build him an indoor sandbox!

My kids never got into cartoons (at that age dd would actively ignore them) but they ate up Singing Time... I think most toddlers want to communicate SO badly that they are really receptive.

Good luck!

-Angela

[sapphire_chan]

Ooo, yes, Lina doesn't care about cartoons (well, she did like Charlie and Lola, but they've got singing and act like real people) and adores Signing Time. Big kids, doing stuff for her, and songs?

[crunchy_mommy]

He is in the room with me in the afternoons because he has really bad separation anxiety (since he was born!!) He is better with DH when he's home and might spend some time in other rooms with him, but he's still getting used to my sister and he screams hysterically if I'm not in the room (yes we tried it for more than 10 minutes, and it took me almost an hour to calm him down). I'm not going to push him before he's ready, and I do not believe that it is doing him harm to be in the room while I'm on the computer (no more than when another parent has the TV on or is paying bills or doing laundry or dishes while their kid is in an exersaucer or something).

Thanks for the all the ideas, I'll have to look into Montessori activities etc.!! I'm not crazy about him watching TV so I really would rather not push that... but I think he'd have fun with beans and qtips and all sorts of stuff Though he might try to eat the beans, they're his favorite food lol so I may have to find bigger objects that don't look edible

[octobermom]

and I do not believe that it is doing him harm to be in the room while I'm on the computer (no more than when another parent has the TV on or is paying bills or doing laundry or dishes while their kid is in an exersaucer or something).

Oh of course not my thinking was if you could get someone to keep hm out for a streach it could relieve some stress for you and allow you at least one long block set of time during the day to work and when he is with you and your having to deal with the touching and stuff it might not feel so intense and "annoying" KWIM? Of course hearing a baby screaming outside isn't exactly calming... Hopefully that will get better

Deanna

[mamazee]

What you said in the first post gave me a very different idea of what was going on than the reality. I agree with other people and say distract, and come up with fun stuff to do. Sadly, for toddlers, fun stuff that distracts well is often messy, so keep the vacuum on standby.

[sapphire_chan]

: that he's better with being taken on an adventure with daddy or aunty than you fear. Lina screams her heart out if I leave the apartment, but cheerfully waves goodbye and goes off with dh for a couple of hours. And she'll be totally fine when I leave as long as she doesn't see me go. (Isn't that weird? If she can see me go out the door, instant crying, but if I just vanish dh can tell her I'm in the car and she'll just keep playing.)

[fbsurvivor]

I feel for you. I'm a working mom and got to work at home some during my pregnancy. I thought I'd be able to work at home after as well. Out came a very high needs baby that screamed for hours on end. I knew that working at home wasn't going to happen and it was difficult. I had to put my dd in daycare, which I expected but I had a romantic notion that I'd only have to do that part of the time. My mother described having my brother in her office, but a high needs kid is a totally different thing. I agree that you are expecting too much of even a normal toddler, though. In this economy it is so hard. I went through a re-org and there's no way I can work from home. (I edit video and all the media is on a local server.) So, I don't have a choice, really, even if my daughter could handle it.

I wouldn't worry so much about the transition to finding a sitter, though. I would try daycare. My high needs daughter is extremely social and even on weekends my husband and I can't provide her with all of the interaction that she needs. A bunch of kids really helps.

Luckily we've been able to cobble together the money we have and tough it out, not having to do anything drastic like find a job or move, but I worry that the day will come. It is really really hard. No one tells us that before we have a kid we need to be prepared for the possibility of living on one income.

[fbsurvivor]

Ok, I read your clarification, so I apologize, but I also thought it was just you from 8-5pm.

I think I've missed some posts, but if he is high needs, then he's got to get out of the house and possibly to some playgroups. High needs means that they need a ton of stimulation.

Also, on the not knowing how to play w/a toddler, I understand that. I often end up just watching my daughter, dumbfounded. You might read the book "Playful Parenting". It is full of stuff. I've also studied the way that my retired school teacher MIL plays with my daughter. Watching someone else has given me lots of ideas. Also, if you try one of classes, like a music class, it will give you ideas.

In addition, whenever possible I give my daugther (17 months), tasks, or have her do things herself. It helps combat their feelings of frustration that they are not in control and they look so proud afterwards. My daughter has to put her bib away after dinner and carry her spoons to the sink. Mind you, there is a ton of guiding involved. She also helps out with laundry and putting away groceries.

Also, have you tried babysmash.com? That might help with the laptop interest. My daughter loves the laptop as well. When we Skype with family members I use another program to lock the keyboard as well. My husband has a similar program on his phone.

Also, if you have a laptop, have you tried working at the park or outdoors somewhere? You mentioned cold weather, so I guess you can't do that right now, but maybe in a couple of months. That would mean he could play with other kids as well.

Working at home with my daughter is a dream, so I am very envious. Today, I'm home sick with daughter in daycare, blah.