Hi All,
This is the first time I am posting on here but have been on a lot & have read a lot of helpful advice for all my kids. My 8 yr old DS was dx'd with Dyslexia & ADD this past year and has been doing really well not being on meds but receiving great support from his teachers (we moved him to a small independent school) & some additional support at home.
My 3 year old ds has always been special since birth. He was always very routine oriented - would not sleep anywhere but in his own bed, we scheduled everything around his nap/feed times as not to disturb his schedule. At the time we thought we were blessed with a child on such a schedule but sometime in the past year or so, his anxiety, stress & inflexibility have over powered his wonderful & happy demeanor. He does not like it when anyone is doing anything that he is not involved in (ie. He is playing with his trains & his little sister picks up a doll in the other room, he sees her and immediately runs over to her & takes it from her and plays with it).
He has routines that must be followed - bedtime - I am the only one who can take him to bed. He must watch the same tv show every night before bed. When he is taken to bed, he fixes his pillows so that they are even & he checks his 'pile' to make sure all stuffed animals & favorite toys are still on his bed. We read the same 2 books, I turn off the lights, rub his back & we talk about his day. Then I kiss him, close the door behind me & we say 'good night' & 'love you' back and forth for about a minute or two until he tells me we are done. This cannot be done by anyone other than me and if we do not follow the schedule the way he wants it, there is a terrible tantrum & we must re-do everything.
This morning he woke up a bit later than everyone else in the house - that didn't work with his routine (he is usually the first child awake). He threw a tantrum & demanded that we all get back into our pj's and that I put our daughter back in her room so that he could follow his morning routine. We all pretty much did what he asked and when we did, it was as if we hit a reset button & he was back.
He also hits me & his siblings when he doesn't like what we said (if his older brother told him politely that he didn't feel like playing trains with him) or if he takes something from his sister & he knows he did something wrong - before I even say something to him, he'll run towards me & hit me.
I plan on calling the ped but where we live - but there isn't much hope for help there. We are one of the very few families at our ped's practice who delay vax & are lectured on it every visit. I am investigating some other doctors who are about an hour from our home in hopes of receiving better responses to our needs but in the mean time any other mamas who have experienced the same with their little ones that could shed some light on what this may be or what we can do to help him. He is the sweetest little boy but when he gets into these episodes - we all start to pull our hair out & it's affecting the dynamics of our family esp with an older ds that already has special needs (he feels like we're giving his brother more attention, etc).
My gut tells me something is wrong but I just don't know what it is. He doesn't meet much of the ASD criteria but every time I do research on his behavior that is the only thing that seems to come up.
I appreciate you reading this & providing any support/information.
- Jenn
This is the first time I am posting on here but have been on a lot & have read a lot of helpful advice for all my kids. My 8 yr old DS was dx'd with Dyslexia & ADD this past year and has been doing really well not being on meds but receiving great support from his teachers (we moved him to a small independent school) & some additional support at home.
My 3 year old ds has always been special since birth. He was always very routine oriented - would not sleep anywhere but in his own bed, we scheduled everything around his nap/feed times as not to disturb his schedule. At the time we thought we were blessed with a child on such a schedule but sometime in the past year or so, his anxiety, stress & inflexibility have over powered his wonderful & happy demeanor. He does not like it when anyone is doing anything that he is not involved in (ie. He is playing with his trains & his little sister picks up a doll in the other room, he sees her and immediately runs over to her & takes it from her and plays with it).
He has routines that must be followed - bedtime - I am the only one who can take him to bed. He must watch the same tv show every night before bed. When he is taken to bed, he fixes his pillows so that they are even & he checks his 'pile' to make sure all stuffed animals & favorite toys are still on his bed. We read the same 2 books, I turn off the lights, rub his back & we talk about his day. Then I kiss him, close the door behind me & we say 'good night' & 'love you' back and forth for about a minute or two until he tells me we are done. This cannot be done by anyone other than me and if we do not follow the schedule the way he wants it, there is a terrible tantrum & we must re-do everything.
This morning he woke up a bit later than everyone else in the house - that didn't work with his routine (he is usually the first child awake). He threw a tantrum & demanded that we all get back into our pj's and that I put our daughter back in her room so that he could follow his morning routine. We all pretty much did what he asked and when we did, it was as if we hit a reset button & he was back.
He also hits me & his siblings when he doesn't like what we said (if his older brother told him politely that he didn't feel like playing trains with him) or if he takes something from his sister & he knows he did something wrong - before I even say something to him, he'll run towards me & hit me.
I plan on calling the ped but where we live - but there isn't much hope for help there. We are one of the very few families at our ped's practice who delay vax & are lectured on it every visit. I am investigating some other doctors who are about an hour from our home in hopes of receiving better responses to our needs but in the mean time any other mamas who have experienced the same with their little ones that could shed some light on what this may be or what we can do to help him. He is the sweetest little boy but when he gets into these episodes - we all start to pull our hair out & it's affecting the dynamics of our family esp with an older ds that already has special needs (he feels like we're giving his brother more attention, etc).
My gut tells me something is wrong but I just don't know what it is. He doesn't meet much of the ASD criteria but every time I do research on his behavior that is the only thing that seems to come up.
I appreciate you reading this & providing any support/information.
- Jenn
mama. I recognized your screen name. We know eachother. 
I hang out here in SN a lot... From our conversations, you know our kiddos have some similarities. I'm here to listen. 
