Things your mother says. - Page 3

[Addie]

My MIL told SIL (her daughter) she should routinely "rough up" her nipples with a scratchy washcloth to get ready for nursing... I've since heard of this, but only in the context of things NOT to do!

[AFWife]

Kelly: Are you stalking me? :P


From MIL at 8 weeks: "If you ever want to sleep you'll start him on solids"

He's been eating solids for a month now...still no sleep.

[GreenGranolaMama]

Originally Posted by Auraji

My mom since DD was like 3 months, she kept insisting , that I give her honey. I know about all the benefitials properties of honey but I also know babies can get a kind of food intoxication/allergy from it.
She always asks me why I dont put shoes on DD to wear INSIDE the house. She tells me that DD is too little to not like things.
My MIL, babies should cry every once in awhile to exercise their lungs and the classic, never let a man take care of your baby. The man in question being DP lol

Omg lol of all the foods to insist on, honey

My grandmother and grandfather also insist that crying is the way babies exercise and that they enjoy it... When my MIL or Mom gives me kooky advice I try to gently tell them my way of doing things, but with the grandparents I just smile and nod...

[Auraji]

Originally Posted by GreenGranolaMama

Omg lol of all the foods to insist on, honey

My grandmother and grandfather also insist that crying is the way babies exercise and that they enjoy it... When my MIL or Mom gives me kooky advice I try to gently tell them my way of doing things, but with the grandparents I just smile and nod...

I know, she said I should it give it to her because of her cough. My mom would always give us honey with lemon when we got sick, but she doesnt seem to understand she's a baby lol

When I explain to her why I dont give her honey, she says "It's only a little drop!"

With my mom I always tell her my way of doing things. My MIL I tried to change the subject, ignore. The grandparents give no advice lol

I wonder where they get crying is exercise lol I mean isnt breathing how we "exercise" our lungs ?

[crunchy_mommy]

Hahaaa love this thread!!!

My mom:
-"He's BF'ing AGAIN?!?!"
-"You just fed him on that side." (she says this over & over every time we see her even though I've tried to explain I have oversupply issues!!)
-"All you kids self-weaned around 9mos except your brother" (she doesn't believe me that a baby wouldn't usually self-wean so young)
-kept buying us disposable diapers the first month or so even though we had a great CD stash... "CD's are too much work" (she cloth-diapered 3 of us 4 kids though!)
-"He's going to choke!!" (we're doing BLW and she still doesn't think he can eat "pieces" even though he's over a year now!)
-"You're turning him into a monster" (because I didn't want to let him cry when he was scared!)

MIL isn't too bad but between her & FIL they come up with a few gems:
-"Um... usually you start them on cereal" (after seeing pictures of DS eating avocado @ 5-6mos or something)
-"You'll stop BF'ing as soon as he gets some teeth" (just 'cause that's what my MIL did I guess??? He's got teeth now, we're still BF'ing!)
-"Maybe he wants some water (or hummus or cookie or etc.)" even though I JUST BF him and he isn't even looking at the food/drink in question
-"The fat guy down the street rolled over his baby because he was co-sleeping"

Oh I could go on & on lol...

[Kelly1101]

Originally Posted by AFWife

Kelly: Are you stalking me? :P

Hehe... I think it's great minds thinking alike.

Originally Posted by Auraji

I know, she said I should it give it to her because of her cough. My mom would always give us honey with lemon when we got sick, but she doesnt seem to understand she's a baby lol

When I explain to her why I dont give her honey, she says "It's only a little drop!"

Yeah, I don't really worry about any foods as long as they are healthy because we aren't at risk for food allergy (and none so far for her, knock on wood), but I think with honey it isn't about allergies, it's about a bacteria in honey that their intestines cannot handle.

[NSmomtobe]

Originally Posted by Kelly1101

I wouldn't do water at his age, I'd just do a bottle of your expressed milk.

"Thank you. I'm glad we're doing well, too." *shrug* That's what I say when I get that comment from my grandmother. She didn't breastfeed (in the late 50's-- not a good time for breastfeeding) because she said the nurses told her she didn't make enough milk (*sigh*). But is so happy that we are because she knows that it is healthier.

Thanks. That's basically what I have said (in both cases).

[NSmomtobe]

Originally Posted by Kelly1101

Yeah, I don't really worry about any foods as long as they are healthy because we aren't at risk for food allergy (and none so far for her, knock on wood), but I think with honey it isn't about allergies, it's about a bacteria in honey that their intestines cannot handle.

It's true. Honey can lead to botulism in infants (although this is rare, honey is not recommended before the age of 1).
http://www.nutriwatch.org/06FST/honey.html

On that note, when I told my grandmother that DS does not take a soother (we've tried and he consistently rejects it, which is really okay with us), she said we needed to dip it in honey to make him take it.

[artpen]

My mother told me that I should put DD on a feeding schedule by letting her cry for a few minutes before feeding her. She told me this when DD was 10 days old. Ay.

My stepmom just sent me an email with the following (she's Asian btw...as is my mom!):
"Do you want to put Kora on disposable diapers? It is too stressful between cloth diapers and breast feeding? You cannot increase or make a dent on the trash pile. By now she can have some solid food to give you a peaceful night. You have to live to raise her. "

My half-sister is very crunchy, too. I remember a few years back, my stepmom called me to tell me how weird she is that she was wearing reusable menstrual pads.

As for my MIL, she's been pretty supportive of our choices. One thing though...we recently started part-time ECing and she just doesn't get it. She makes all kinds of comments about how we are being potty trained by our DD.

Oh well.

[cristeen]

Originally Posted by Addie

My MIL told SIL (her daughter) she should routinely "rough up" her nipples with a scratchy washcloth to get ready for nursing... I've since heard of this, but only in the context of things NOT to do!

My aunt told me this one years ago when we were planning my cousin's shower. It sounded wrong then.

And recently an old friend trotted it out. She's recently pg and her mom told her this. I told her it was an old wives' tale, but as far as she's concerned her mom knows everything there is to know about BFing, since she did it with 4 kids, so I suspect she's doing it.

[Tee25]

MIL: "You're being a good mom this time around" (not starting rice cereal) "Next one you'll feed them rice cereal so you can get some sleep"

[AFWife]

Originally Posted by Tee25

MIL: "You're being a good mom this time around" (not starting rice cereal) "Next one you'll feed them rice cereal so you can get some sleep"

So you're a good mom the first time and then resort to being a bad mom later? (I'm not saying rice cereal makes a person a bad mom...it's what the comment implied)

[Xavismom]

My mom was changing DS's diaper (pee only) and was about to put a new one on without wiping him off. I figured she forgot and said, 'Oh, you forgot to wipe him!' She looked suprised, and said "Its only pee, you dont need to wipe for pee!"

OMG... I only told her that we wipe DS every time, even 'only for pee' and didnt say what I was REALLY thinking...

She never wiped ME when I 'only peed'?!?!?!

[mommy2two babes]

Originally Posted by Xavismom

My mom was changing DS's diaper (pee only) and was about to put a new one on without wiping him off. I figured she forgot and said, 'Oh, you forgot to wipe him!' She looked suprised, and said "Its only pee, you dont need to wipe for pee!"

OMG... I only told her that we wipe DS every time, even 'only for pee' and didnt say what I was REALLY thinking...

She never wiped ME when I 'only peed'?!?!?!

I had a daycare Mom not so nicley ask me why I was going through so many wipes and told me not to wipe him unless he pooped.

[Heidi74]

Originally Posted by mommy2two babes

I had a daycare Mom not so nicley ask me why I was going through so many wipes and told me not to wipe him unless he pooped.

Well, this is probably really gross, but I actually don't always use baby wipes when they've just peed...unless the diaper is really, really wet, which it usually isn't. If we're home I will use a cloth wipe, but out and about-nah. Mostly because of all the gunk that's in the wipes, and also because I don't feel it's necessary--especially in an EBF baby where the urine doesn't smell anyway. If they smell or seem really wet, of course I wipe, but otherwise not.

I can't think of any funny things my mom has said at the moment.

MIL has had a couple of gems, though she is very sweet, and tries very hard not to meddle. We only see them a couple of times a year, since they live across the country. When DS1 was 7 months old, my ILs seemed a bit surprised that I was still nursing, and when I said I had no plans to stop (asked when I would wean) I got the "just wait until he has teeth" comment. I mentioned that the WHO recommends at least two years, and MIL (while laughing) then told about a daughter of a friend of theirs who (shock, horror!) had nursed a toddler. It had been so funny, because the child could actually go up to the mother and ask to nurse. I politely kept my mouth shut.

At a future visit, when DS was 17 months old, and I was pregnant with DS2, she came across me nursing him to sleep, but all she said was "OH. I didn't realize you were still doing that." Poor thing. I could tell she was trying very hard to mind her own business, but was genuinely worried, since we had told them about the pregnancy. (Incidentally, DS stopped nursing at 19 months, halfway through the pregancy, but with DS2 I will probably go longer, so I hope they won't be too scandalized.)

We've also gotten the "is he sleeping through the night yet?" question every time we have seen them, or talked on the phone, ever since DS1 was about 3 weeks old. I am getting very, very tired of that question. I usually just say something like "I don't remember," but that confuses them.

[diana_of_the_dunes]

Man, I love threads like this...! I don't feel that DH and I are doing anything out of the ordinary raising our LO (just let baby tell us what he needs and when, which seems pretty straightforward), but when I get comments from others it reminds me that mainstream parents see us as unusual. I guess posting and reading on here makes me forget that we're not "normal".

My mom isn't really "crunchy", but she's been very supportive of how DH and I are raising our son. We had one little incident when DS stopped being able to sleep when he was just laid down in his crib or bassinet; before that, he'd just conk right out. Around 2.5 months, he just... stopped. My mom said he needed to be left alone to "find his spot". I'd let him fuss a bit, but if he started crying, I'd try soothing him in the crib, then I'd pick him up if he didn't settle down or he started to get more upset. We almost got into an argument over it, and I remember getting PO'd and almost yelling that I was NOT going to let him cry. She left the room, then came back a few minutes later to apologize. She said she knows I'm being a good mom, and I should do what I feel is right for my baby. She said was sorry and she'd do whatever I wanted her to do when she watches him. She may not always agree with me, but I trust her to take care of DS the same way DH and I do. She even wears him in the Beco when she watches him or if we go out shopping together.

My MIL on the other hand... She thinks we're nuts. Or rather, she thinks I'm nuts and I brainwashed her son, lol. One time she said to DH, "You don't like it when he (the baby) cries, do you?" Uh... no. Are you supposed to like hearing your baby cry? Or when she was over one night for dinner and DS was in his swing so I could eat. He started fussing, and she said, "Just let him cry. Maybe he'll cry himself to sleep." I just said, "No, we don't do that." She told DH that she let all her kids cry, and they all turned out fine.

DH explained to her that you can't spoil an infant when she commented that we were going to spoil him because we held him all the time. What else do you do with a 6 week old? Now that he's 5 months, he can play and spends time on his own, but at 6 weeks?

And my SIL must say all kinds of crap about us, since her 11 year old came up to us at Christmas and said we had a spoiled baby.

Oh well... We don't even try to argue our point anymore. We just say "okay, thanks", and leave it at that. They're not going to change their minds, and I know we won't change ours.

[BlueWolf]

Originally Posted by diana_of_the_dunes

My MIL on the other hand... She thinks we're nuts. Or rather, she thinks I'm nuts and I brainwashed her son, lol. One time she said to DH, "You don't like it when he (the baby) cries, do you?" Uh... no. Are you supposed to like hearing your baby cry? Or when she was over one night for dinner and DS was in his swing so I could eat. He started fussing, and she said, "Just let him cry. Maybe he'll cry himself to sleep." I just said, "No, we don't do that." She told DH that she let all her kids cry, and they all turned out fine.
]

Seriously, what is with this comment? My MIL says the same stupid thing. It always makes me irate. Are we suppose to ENJOY hearing our babies cry? She also says the "all my babies were left to cry it out and they turned out fine". However, my DH will be the first one to tell you that he thinks his poor communication skills and sometimes emotional detachment comes from his mom just leaving him to cry it out.

[diana_of_the_dunes]

Originally Posted by BlueWolf

Seriously, what is with this comment? My MIL says the same stupid thing. It always makes me irate. Are we suppose to ENJOY hearing our babies cry? She also says the "all my babies were left to cry it out and they turned out fine". However, my DH will be the first one to tell you that he thinks his poor communication skills and sometimes emotional detachment comes from his mom just leaving him to cry it out.

I know that everybody has "issues", even with wonderful, loving parents. But it really seems that DH's family is sort of emotionally stunted. They all say "I love you" all the time, but they're not affectionate or respectful AT ALL to each other. Even with the babies and kids. My mom noticed it too, so it's not just my jaded opinion! I dunno if it has to do with CIO, but that's likely a symptom, IMO.

[JoyFilled]

Can I say things my Dad says?

I leaked some milk in a restaurant and he says "You know you can get a pill to stop that right?". I just thought "What would my dd eat then?". lol

I'm just a little tired of people stating how wonderful it is that I am BF including my step-mom. I can't wait to BF is a non-issue.

[JayJay]

Oh, my head almost exploded a few days ago. My DP came out with the whole "babies NEED to cry because it expands their lungs!!!" BS... Oh. My. Gawd. Seriously. I was like "you've got to be kidding..."

But he wasn't. He actually believed himself... Oy vay...