So YoungSon, 13, PDD and whatever else, and I have a great non-adversarial relationship. Please understand that he wants to do what I ask but cannot; this is not a discipline issue. He has major anxiety issues that are interfering, not rebelliousness or teen angst.
His room is a disaster. I mean rotting food, all the dishes and silverware in the house have been lost in there, and heaven knows what all else. But he truly cannot bear anyone entering his room - whether he is there or not, no matter who, no one goes in his room. Period. He has been this way for years. I have let this go too far - he last cleaned it a couple months ago, and it is starting to stink.
To make matters worse, we have a social worker inspection tomorrow afternoon (I am a foster parent and this happens occasionally).
He is really unable to do this himself. He goes up to try, comes back an hour later in tears. I see that he is responding just the way he does to overwhelming anxiety. I don't know how to help him. He is not really able to talk about it - he is very verbal, but not at all about his feelings or any emotional issues.
I sort of have a plan for tomorrow, but something has to change. It is really nor OK for his room to be this gross. Did I ever mention my degree is in Public Health?!?
So - does anyone else have issues like this?
1. the room is messy
2. YoungSon really can't stand anyone in his room.
3. He doesn't have the skills to clean it.
4. He won't let anyone in to help.
Any suggestion welcome - I am feeling especially ineffective this eve...
His room is a disaster. I mean rotting food, all the dishes and silverware in the house have been lost in there, and heaven knows what all else. But he truly cannot bear anyone entering his room - whether he is there or not, no matter who, no one goes in his room. Period. He has been this way for years. I have let this go too far - he last cleaned it a couple months ago, and it is starting to stink.
To make matters worse, we have a social worker inspection tomorrow afternoon (I am a foster parent and this happens occasionally).
He is really unable to do this himself. He goes up to try, comes back an hour later in tears. I see that he is responding just the way he does to overwhelming anxiety. I don't know how to help him. He is not really able to talk about it - he is very verbal, but not at all about his feelings or any emotional issues.
I sort of have a plan for tomorrow, but something has to change. It is really nor OK for his room to be this gross. Did I ever mention my degree is in Public Health?!?
So - does anyone else have issues like this?
1. the room is messy
2. YoungSon really can't stand anyone in his room.
3. He doesn't have the skills to clean it.
4. He won't let anyone in to help.
Any suggestion welcome - I am feeling especially ineffective this eve...
