Registry opinions needed: what to buy ourselves?

[thefreckledmama]

You'd think I'd have a better grasp on what other would be likely to get for us, seeing as how this is our 4th, but apparently, I don't.

My SIL and BFF are throwing me a shower the end of March (I'm due the beginning of May), and I did an online registry where I can register for anything and everything under the sun. Since this is my 4th (1st boy), I'm thinking that people are going to be a lot less likely to purchase anything on the larger/more expensive side, figuring I already have it. Specifically I'm wondering about a car seat, and the cloth diapers that I put on my registry. The car seat we have is a bucket, and I'm wanting a convertible for the new baby, because I plan on putting him in a sling outside of the car, and have a toddler to keep a hand on as well. Tomorrow is the last day of the trade in event at BRU, and I'm not sure if I should go ahead and get the car seat ourselves (at 25% off), or wait and see if anyone gets it for us, and if not pay full price later on.

As for the diapers,...I'm wondering how many mamas who registered for cloth diapers actually received them? If it's not likely, I'd rather go ahead and get them now (while we have the money from our tax refund), then have to get them later on if I don't receive them.

I just hate to go buy either item(s), when someone may decide to purchase them as a gift.

What have others' experiences been so far with registries?

[smpayne]

I would go ahead and get the car seat you want.

Go ahead and order at least 1/2-3/4 the amount of diaper you want, especially basic borning ones. Gift givers will be willing to purchase a few of the fancy expensive ones, but you will never get as many as you really need.

[ed_tricia]

I think the big items are most likely to come from relatives, esp. the grandparents. If no one has mentioned wanting to purchase the car seat, I wouldn't count on it. Honestly, I'd buy it myself while you can get a good deal, leave it in the box w/ the receipt taped to it, and keep it on your registry. That way, if someone does buy it, you can return yours. Double check the store's return policy though and be sure it would be within their time frame still.
Instead of buying all the diapers or whatever else now, could you set aside the money you'd spend? That way you can look for good sales instead of full retail, and there should be plenty of shopping time post-shower. I would get a few at a time as you find good deals.

[Peace+Hope]

what about specifically asking for people to contribute to your cloth diaper or car seat fund? you could have the organizers emphasize that you really need only what you've registered for, and if they do not see anything they want to buy, they could contribute towards the bigger items or group of items (diapers).

myregistry.com has a feature that allows for "cash" gifts. or, they could collect money and make it fun, telling guests they will "present" you with the large item(s) and announce everyone who contributed.

i did this for my sister, and people really got into it.

[Pinoikoi]

I get big items from my parents.. (my father just asks me to tell him what I need and he gets it or sends me a check to get it myself). Other relatives, though? They like buying cutesy stuff like clothes..

At my old job, I organized a baby shower for one of the ladies, and one dept all chipped in for the stroller set she wanted.

[BabyWang2010]

If it were me I would wait because even if you don't get the car seat I'm sure you will get some gift cards which You can use towards the carseat you want and the gift cards will probably total more money than 25% off I'm sure.

[Jenica]

You should check out the thread "why do people completely ignore registries" in the April DDC. The consensus seems to be people love to buy baby clothes, blankets, and socks more than they like buying off the registry. I just had my shower last weekend and I did get some cloth diaper stuff but not nearly all that I need. I received 5 covers, 6 prefolds, and some hemp doublers. I did get a lot of gift cards but my shower was out of state and most people knew I would have to bring stuff back so that may have contributed.

I echo the car seat being something a close relative would most likely buy. My MIL bought ours. I think buying it and taping the receipt to the box is a really good idea.

[thefreckledmama]

That was a great idea about buying the carseat and leaving it in the box with the reciept until after the shower.

We ended up missing the sale, but I'm not too worried about it. If we don't get it, we need it, so even paying regular price for it isn't that big of a deal.

People disregarding the registry is what I wish I could avoid. Since this isn't my first, there are specific things I need-plenty of which are very inexpensive, and plenty of normal shower fare that I wish I could avoid.

If nothing else, I'll just return/exchange things that people get that we don't need.

[rootzdawta]

Moved from I'm Pregnant to Life with a Babe.

[jdg]

Really, the best advice I can give with a registry is to find 1-2 local stores with great return/exchange policies and register there - that will let you at least get in-store credit without a receipt. You'll get stuff that you don't need and don't want, and you can exchange that for the stuff that you really DO want. It's easier than trying to convince people to buy practical stuff instead of ANOTHER layette!

[JMJ]

I ended up buying my own car seat and cloth diapers. In fact, when I thanked people for the money they gave me and told them that I spent it on cloth diapers, I got a lot of somewhat off-taste jokes about what I was letting my baby do to their gift and implying that it was a reflection of what I thought of them. My sister knew that I would want to CD and got me some, but they were so thin that they wouldn't work as diapers but make great burp cloths and were DD's favorite toy for a long time. I did get the diaper pail off my registry, though, and like other people are saying, I really didn't get many of the things on my registry. I didn't register for any clothes or bath products but got lots of both... and complaints about how there were no clothes on my registry.

With the shower over a month before your DD, I'd recommend holding off on buying most things until afterwards. You can just have a list of the things that you're going to buy if you don't get them, and then as soon as the shower is over, start buying. If money is tight for you and you'd really like for your shower to help you out financially by getting you some of the things that you really need, you could go to the planners and tell them that what you really need is a carseat. Many people who organize showers are really good at encouraging people to go in on one big ticket item instead of lots of little things that they aren't sure that people want.

[cristeen]

Honestly, if you want those things purchased for you, I'd go to the people most likely to spend that much money and be specific about what you want from them. Grandma bought our guy's car seat because I flat out asked her to (and she bought my maternity clothes). But the only person who actually shopped off our registry was grandpa, and we got 1 pack of prefolds out of him (4-pk). All the rest of the dipes I had to buy myself. Everyone else was more interested in buying clothes, cute socks (which didn't fit him even as a NB), bibs, blankets and stuffed toys. And the killer is that most of that stuff hasn't been used. At most he's worn 4 outfits in each size. We definitely didn't need an even dozen (or more). Most of the stuff has been packed away new without tags.

[BuddingBelly]

I say go ahead and register for anything you need and hold off on buying anything until you see what you end up with. Also, you said you were registered on a site that lets you pick anything you want--are you using myregistry.com? I'm using it and I ended up putting a diaper fund on my registry since I wasn't sure yet how many I will need (I'm doing cloth too). I figure if I have more than enough, I can put the rest of that money toward anything else I still need.