It's a Boy! - now what do I say?

[balancedmama]

So if you have an friend on a social networking site, and they *just* announced that they are having a boy....

Do you message them w/ an intact link? If so, which one, and what do you say?

I know I"m risking sounding like that crazy person, but I'm having a hard time stopping myself.

[NamastePlatypus]

I have no problem. I email them the same thing my aunt told me. The normal congrats and sorts and that this was something I never knew about till I was preggers and thank God everyday someone told me because after I saw it I was changed and could have never lived with myself for doing something so terriable that I can never take back. It was NOTHING like what I thought it was and my husband was even more in shock.






I felt it was out of love and care and concern. Oh and I attach the video for there visual and auditory learning experience.

[Bea]

It's always worth mentioning.

I was talking to a collegue one night, she was 20 years old, no children but one of those women whose job in life is to be a mother.

You know the type? Just a born Mommy All that was missing was the right man and true love. Lovely girl.

I brought up circ. She was all for it. Intact was 'weird'.

I told her a little bit about anatomy, dispelled a couple of myths about cancer, hygiene etc then (little did I know I was pulling out the big guns)) talked about choice. Whose choice? The adult mans right to choose etc. The other nurse working that night was a guy who had a 7 yo son that was circ'd against his wishes. It was a very low key conversation. Just passing the time type thing at 3 am.

I went for a break came back 15 minutes later to be informed by my co worker that she would NEVER circ her son.

The clincher was the idea of it being his choice. She'd had a childhood of having others beliefs (religious and cultural...she was Native American) inflicted on her and wanted different for her children.

You never know when something you say say strikes a chord!

[fruitful womb]

Originally Posted by balancedmama

So if you have an friend on a social networking site, and they *just* announced that they are having a boy....

Do you message them w/ an intact link? If so, which one, and what do you say?

I know I"m risking sounding like that crazy person, but I'm having a hard time stopping myself.

Congratulations Its a Boy!

In the past I've sent links, this book, and this book, movies (CUT documentary, Dr. Dean Edell ), and depending on the person I've sent P&T BS season 3 episode 1 .

Another good recommendation is the film documentary "Facing Circumcision: Eight Physicians Tell Their Stories" by Cheron Bayna

I wish I could find the entire film. Some one showed it to me 9 yrs ago after my first was born. If you find it, let me know.

[Night_Nurse]

Originally Posted by fruitful womb

Congratulations Its a Boy!

Yes, I think this is a good link!

These seem good too-

http://www.askdrsears.com/html/1/T012000.asp

http://children.webmd.com/should-i-h...umcised#av2390

http://www.divinecaroline.com/22099/69403/print



I'd always rather being known as the crazy friend who offers intact info (and possibly offend someone) than to not say anything about circ and then have the friend later say she wouldn't have circed if she'd only known she had that option, yk?
I think you can send one or two links, and just say "Glad I took time to research this when I was pregnant" and leave it at that without seeming overbearing or harming the relationship.
Or maybe just congratulate her and mention you know circ is something parents of boys have to research and to make sure she searches for videos of different techniques, pain relief and intact care. When she sees how circ are done, learns that pain relief isn't always used or effective, and how intact care is easy and more boys are left intact, she might reconsider.
Or, send her here to Mothering! It's a great source of pregnancy and parenting information!

[claddaghmom]

Well could you do it indirectly? Do you already post activism type links on your fb?

My FB is primarily for activism and I am always posting links about MGM, breastfeeding, birth etc. I've had some friends accuse me of "singling them out" with my posts but then all I do is point out that I've been posting all my links on these topics for more than a year and it has nothing to do with them...but they are welcome to learn about the subject. And then I give them more links at the bottom of my reply haha.

[elanorh]

I go NamastePlatypus's route, more or less.

I usually send off an email with a list of books that I liked (my friends know I'm wonky and weird that way ) - I have them broken into 'general,' 'pregnancy,' 'baby,' and 'breastfeeding' categories. I offer that we cloth-diapered, and if they are considering it, I loved it and would answer any questions they have. And I also put a couple links (I think the Oknocirc.blogspot one), and say that they should research circumcision, that it's something that I never thought much about until we asked our Pediatrician about it, and she told us that the AAP no longer recommends it, and that she doesn't do it unless the parents have a religious reason. (Since we have dds, I can't offer any 'parenting an intact kid' experience to them) --- And I add that I would have wanted someone to share these links with me while I was pregnant with dd1, so I am sharing them now.

...And then I pretty much leave it alone. Ironically, since I started including the circumcision information, my friends/family have *all* had baby girls. But at least I've shared the information. I have had several friends that I've shared the email with, thank me later for the book recommendations etc. So hopefully it's getting the word out.

I also occasionally have posted a circ-related article on FB. But I know I'm a FB freak, and not everyone is on often enough to notice a new link (and I post enough stuff that it would be easy for someone to ignore or miss it). So I do send the email too.