Wearing a baby and having a toddler

[sophi4ka]

I carried DD almost exclusively and very rarely used a stroller. Now she is 26 mo and doesn't want to sit in a stroller or be carried at all. She likes to walk by herself.

We are going to have another baby in 2 months.

My worry is that I will not be able to carry the little one while hanging out with the two of them as DD will want to be picked up, will need attention, will need to be changed, etc. Having a baby on my chest will make attending DDs needs so much more difficult. (This is how I imagine it at least)

What was your experience? Did you use a stroller more with the second baby if you had a relatively young older sibling?

I know I could probably put the little one on my back, but I am not that confident doing that with very little babies.

Thanks
Sophie

[NickisDiapers]

Congratulations on your new LO-to-be!

Personally, I found that DS1 does need to be held/attention...but wearing DS2 makes it EASIER to give them both the attention they need.

I still don't use a stroller, personally. DS1 likes to walk when we go places, or DH wears him. There are definitely times when it's a little bit of a juggling act (ie wearing DS2, DS1 falls asleep in the car and needs to be carried in...) but you just do what you must. DS1 has learned that there's still room on my lap when DS2 is there, just a little farther out towards my knees. And make sure that you're able to give your older LO more one-on-one time....it won't be near as big an issue as you'd think. I was scared, too! Back carries with a newborn can be done, and I tried it, but it really didn't make that much of a difference for us.

If you get REALLY ambitious, you can try wearing them BOTH! (I've done that a few times, but boy, 33lbs on the back and 15lbs on the front gets HEAVY!)

[llwr]

This is something I've struggled with as well. Mine are 31 mos apart. I am wearing my 2nd much more than I did my first. With DD1, I had time to try to teach her to nap alone, but now I'm busy with both girls and this is just easier.

Somewhere around maybe weeks 3-6 I struggled with guilt that I just couldn't be there for DD1 the way I wanted to. DD2 wasn't napping alone and it was hard to cuddle with her and give her the time that she used to get. But you can still be together and cuddle a little bit differently. DD1 really loves DD2, so that's helped a lot. I started co-sleeping with DD1 for part of the night after she had a nightmare and now I kind of look forward to her waking up in the middle of the night and crawling in bed with us.

There's 2 kids and 1 of you, so everybody can't win all the time, but maybe we all have to realize at somepoint that we're not the center of the universe. You just do the best you can. I make a special effort to have special time with DD1.

[sophi4ka]

Thank you ladies! Your replies were very helpful, I feel more relaxed now