Why no sex until.... - Page 2

[its_our_family]

Originally posted by Greaseball
I hear oral sex is OK as long as your dh doesn't blow air into the vagina. (Why would anyone do that anyway?)

I've read that if a woman has a c/s, she is only told she has to wait 4 weeks. Why is that? Wouldn't the placental site be the same? I'd think she would have to wait even longer, just to make sure everything healed up.

With both of my c/bs they said 6 weeks. With this babe we only waited 3. The bleeding had stopped and I felt really good. Your incision is normally closed within 1.5 weeks you just have to be careful. Funny thing is that it still hurts like heck! Its weird, I didn't have much dilation this time at all and no labor but it hurt like it did with Tracy and with him I labored for 16 hours and dilated to 3cm.

What causes it to hurt??

As for the air and oral sex...I agree....who would want air blown into their vagina?? That just sounds weird...

[firefly]

I appreciate this post. With my son I bled for over six weeks. My partner and I did not have sex until my ds was six months old.
We tried several times before that, but the pain was unreal. I really don't want that to happen again-I had thought that was the norm. This post has inspired me to speak to my new midwife. I'm now curious why I bled so much for so long.

[Anna Trueblood]

Count me as another who went months before having sex. I was just really dry from the nursing and I've never been well lubed. A friend of mine who is a sex educator recommended silicone based lube and I cannot praise it highly enough. My doctor had recommended estrogen cream, but it made my supply drop sharply. Then she recommended counselling, which was not necessary-- I did fine during non-penetrative acts but I was just sahara-like. You can find Wet brand silicone based lube at www.good-vibes.com .

[Greaseball]

Why is estrogen cream often recommended? Wouldn't something like Astroglide work?

[Anna Trueblood]

Estrogen was recommended because I had some atrophy in my vagina- despite bajillions of kegels. And I was just bone dry. Now previously, I was usually pretty dry, and we used Astroglide, which I love. But that wasn't cutting it anymore.

[copslass]

Seems to be a common problem in US, with the high percentage of circ'd men in the childbearing age range.

I wonder if women whose partners are intact have these problems with dryness? Anyone?

[Anna Trueblood]

Considering that I have the same problem when masturbating, I don't think it's related to the state of dh's penis.

[cottonwood]

I think she meant not that the state of your husband's penis might be causing the dryness, but that dryness isn't as much of a problem during intercourse when there is a foreskin involved, because the foreskin reduces friction. Or at least that is what I hear, personally I'll never know.

[Anna Trueblood]

I didn't think she meant that at all. I assumed that she meant that an uncut penis would be more likely to retain the pre-ejaculate lubrication. Which I'm sure it is, however, IME with nursing hormones a few drops of precum aren't enough. I was producing zero vaginal moistness, and no cervical mucous. My tissues were so dry that I tore myself while washing in the tub more than once. (this is probably a good place for that jaw dropper emoticon!) For some women, the hormones that come with nursing not only suppress ovulation and menses, but also pretty much shut down the libido. It can happen, and it takes a lot of communication with your partner to make it through the demands of a newborn without the bonding "glue" of physical intimacy.

[mattemma04]

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[girliemama]

Nobody wants to wait six weeks? Honey, the first time, my hormones hit bottom and I had no interest. Not to mention the sleep deprivation and the constant attachment of another human being on me. I would have loved a time when I could NOT be touched! Besides the fact that if my daughter had given me enough time to have sex, I'd have used it to take a nap. It was a year before we had sex again, and it went slowly. It wasn't as bad with number two, but it was months before I felt healed down below. I had only the tiniest perineal tear, but I also had a small clitoral tear, and believe me, that doesn't FEEL small at all! Bless all your horny little hearts! All I can say is after this little one emerges, have one for me, OK?

[eilonwy]

I'm with you girliemamma; though my issue wasn't hormonal, I definately was not into sex at 6 weeks pp. We waited until 8 weeks, and after that it was almost another month before I wanted to try again.