sleep problems--advice needed

[beep]

My kid seems to wake up right when we'd like him to settle down (about 10-11 pm). Usually we get him to sleep and then he pops awake after just a few minutes. Then he fusses for a bit and only quiets when nursing (which I can't manage lying down). Then sometime in the wee hours he starts full blown screaming, for several hours. Nothing seems to help. DP finds himself irrationally angry and can't take it for long. He is advocating trying crying it out... which we sort of do already out of exhaustion, except I stay with the baby and hold him without otherwise trying to comfort him as he kicks and screams. He naps OK during the day, though often needs quite a bit of help settling down to sleep for a nap (similar techniques don't help at night). Any thoughts or suggestions? I am really feeling at the end of my rope, and my work is really suffering.

[carmel23]

is he too hot at night? Is the room stuffy?

My babies seems to be fussy like that if they're too warm or stuffy. I've been known to open the windows even if it is freezing outside.

Getting lots of fresh air during the day tends to make them sleep better at night (why I don't know, but it does seem to work).

Do you have a fan or any kind of white noise? Does baby respond to white noise? Have you read Happiest Baby on the Block? That might have some techniques for calming baby.

that sounds so miserable for all of you! Colic cries that I am familiar with are in the evening until 10 or so at night, but then baby usually settles. It seems surprising to me for baby to cry at night like that, unless he just has his days and nights mixed up. In that case I would really try to get him out during the day in the fresh air.

And then at night, keep the lights dim, and the house quiet.

I wonder if there is something else in the environment that is disturbing him... something that isn't there during the day??

I wish I had something better then my ramblings... Hang in there, if it is colic, that typically ends at 3 months... so there isn't too much longer until then, right?

[evinmom]

My DD was a very difficult sleeper. In addition to her allergy problems she was extremely sensitive to stimuli. I used to be afraid she had a sensory processing disorder. She rarely slept and when she did sleep, any noise (i.e. truck driving by outside) would wake her and it would take forever for her to go back to sleep. She also wouldn't fall asleep at the breast so we spent a lot of time slinging, bouncing, singing, etc... Like the PP mentioned, you can always try "The Happiest Baby On the Block" book. It has a lot of suggestions for calming fussy babies. After DD was a year old, I finally had to put her in her own bed in her own room and keep the door tightly shut. She had a sleep CD I would put on repeat. It took awhile, but eventually the consistency helped and she started napping during the day. We still struggled with night-time sleep until after her 3rd birthday, but it did get easier to put her back to sleep when she woke. I hope some others have better answers for you. Just wanted you to know I can sympathize.

[Awaken]

just wanted to say I feel your pain! My first was like that! It was so hard. I felt so inadequate being unable to calm him. We only survived by dh and I taking shifts and the other person sleeping somewhere else in the house so we could get a few hours' sleep, anyway.

I want to echo the previous suggestions. I wish I had known about the Happiest Baby back then!

White noise helped and we still do it to this day (he's 7 now). We swaddled tightly until he was a year old. Like evinmom said, he also wouldn't nurse to sleep so we had to bounce, walk, etc to get him to sleep at all. it was awful till age 3 but then he improved. Hopefully yours will not last that long!

Lavendar oil? rescue remedy? you drinking chamomile tea? These are some things I do, not sure if it works but it makes me feel like I'm doing something calming for the baby and myself which in itself can help.

Some of it is just immaturity of the nervous system which takes a little longer in some babies to mature. I was just reading Dr Sears and was reminded of some good suggestions. Maybe there will be some ideas for you in the Baby Book or Nighttime Parenting (or at least reassurance and encouragement!).

hugs, mama.