I know this is long but I could really use some BTDT experience. We're starting to buy baby furniture right now so I need to figure out the plan before I go shopping. I know it may seem like I'm way overthinking this, but I'm a planner kind of person. I'm ok with re-evaluating when baby gets here, although we don't have the budget to try out a thousand different options. Please help me work through this.
We have a queen size bed. It's not an option to upsize to a king, or to add another (twin or full) size mattress to make a huge bed. Our bed is a regular innerspring mattress that we've had for almost 6 years and we plan on adding an organic latex/wool/cotton topper to it for comfort and organicness. We have a big puffy comforter although we'll switch to layers of regular cotton blankets when the baby comes home. I'm afraid of cosleeping with a brand new newborn in the bed right next to me. Maybe I shouldn't be, but I am. I'm afraid that our mattress will be too cushy and the baby will roll into me and the dent I'm making into the bed. I'm worried about pulling blankets up over my head (how I normally sleep) and suffocating the baby. I'm really only worried about this with a newborn, not with an older infant who can easily roll and crawl/creep. I'm also worried about space (DH and I are not small people). The baby will sleep on the other side of me, not between me and DH.
These are my options. Keep in mind that these are really only for the first few months since after the baby is a few months old I'm ok with just a regular family bed setup even though space is technically an issue then too.
1. Full size Arms Reach Cosleeper. We have a used regular sized cosleeper with a non organic mattress and could swing an organic mattress if we *knew* that the baby would use it for a while. Most likely we would end up padding the existing mattress with a folded quilt or something. My concern for this is that the baby simply won't go for it. I've heard so many times that the cosleeper turned into an expensive laundry basket.
2. We're getting an Ikea Gulliver crib with an Ikea mattress (not organic but the best we can afford). We're adopting and DH is concerned that the sw would find the setup not ok and we would have to unsidecar it permanently or for visits. My concerns are that the Ikea crib is so short (about the same height as the cosleeper actually) that the mattress won't reach our bed and/or that the crib itself is so short that it will provide almost no rail (so basically just like the Arm's Reach); also that there is no enclosed place for an older napping child to sleep because now we're using the crib.
3. Family bed with one of those in bed cosleepers. DH would have to spend a few weeks in the guest room (because of space) until I'm comfortable with baby just in the bed. DH and I sleeping in separate rooms is not a good long term solution. The problem with this is that the baby may outgrow it before I'm comfortable with number 4.
4. Straight up family bed with a bed rail. My concerns for this are space and rolling onto baby when they are brand new, or more specifically baby rolling into me or into the dent from my body.
5. Two cribs. The Ikea crib in the baby's room for naps and a taller crib for sidecarring. My problem with this is mostly budgetary. The whole point of the Ikea furniture in the first place is to save money. Not to mention the absurdity of having two cribs for a cosleeping family.
6. Magical solution that I haven't thought of yet. Ideas?
We have a queen size bed. It's not an option to upsize to a king, or to add another (twin or full) size mattress to make a huge bed. Our bed is a regular innerspring mattress that we've had for almost 6 years and we plan on adding an organic latex/wool/cotton topper to it for comfort and organicness. We have a big puffy comforter although we'll switch to layers of regular cotton blankets when the baby comes home. I'm afraid of cosleeping with a brand new newborn in the bed right next to me. Maybe I shouldn't be, but I am. I'm afraid that our mattress will be too cushy and the baby will roll into me and the dent I'm making into the bed. I'm worried about pulling blankets up over my head (how I normally sleep) and suffocating the baby. I'm really only worried about this with a newborn, not with an older infant who can easily roll and crawl/creep. I'm also worried about space (DH and I are not small people). The baby will sleep on the other side of me, not between me and DH.
These are my options. Keep in mind that these are really only for the first few months since after the baby is a few months old I'm ok with just a regular family bed setup even though space is technically an issue then too.
1. Full size Arms Reach Cosleeper. We have a used regular sized cosleeper with a non organic mattress and could swing an organic mattress if we *knew* that the baby would use it for a while. Most likely we would end up padding the existing mattress with a folded quilt or something. My concern for this is that the baby simply won't go for it. I've heard so many times that the cosleeper turned into an expensive laundry basket.
2. We're getting an Ikea Gulliver crib with an Ikea mattress (not organic but the best we can afford). We're adopting and DH is concerned that the sw would find the setup not ok and we would have to unsidecar it permanently or for visits. My concerns are that the Ikea crib is so short (about the same height as the cosleeper actually) that the mattress won't reach our bed and/or that the crib itself is so short that it will provide almost no rail (so basically just like the Arm's Reach); also that there is no enclosed place for an older napping child to sleep because now we're using the crib.
3. Family bed with one of those in bed cosleepers. DH would have to spend a few weeks in the guest room (because of space) until I'm comfortable with baby just in the bed. DH and I sleeping in separate rooms is not a good long term solution. The problem with this is that the baby may outgrow it before I'm comfortable with number 4.
4. Straight up family bed with a bed rail. My concerns for this are space and rolling onto baby when they are brand new, or more specifically baby rolling into me or into the dent from my body.
5. Two cribs. The Ikea crib in the baby's room for naps and a taller crib for sidecarring. My problem with this is mostly budgetary. The whole point of the Ikea furniture in the first place is to save money. Not to mention the absurdity of having two cribs for a cosleeping family.
6. Magical solution that I haven't thought of yet. Ideas?
