Ever since I was a teenager, I've wanted to be a fashion designer, but just stuffed it in back of my head as I was told what to do by my parents and didn't know any better that I could set my own course for my life. This is my DREAM!
But it's not like I could even compromise and start doing some sewing from home and sell on Etsy. I don't know how to sew at all and I don't know how to render my visions onto paper, but I have vision, really forward-thinking visions. I used to spot fashion trends for a major makeup company in NYC and I was really good at it. But designing clothes, that makes my heart sing, and I recently realized that we all have to do what makes our heart sing...
...it's just that intellectually, I can't wrap my head around pursuing this goal. I mean first of all, it's not like this is a well-paying field I'd be getting into. It's really risky, competitive, only the cream of the crop ever make it, and even then, with a lot of struggling and lean years. My husband makes a decent salary, but I just feel like we'd be stretching things really thin if I add the tuition for a design degree into the mix. Both my children are in school and I can't fathom sending them to public schools, especially DS1 who is very sensitive and artistic. I want to send him to a school where his talents could be nurtured, cuz public school never did that for me. Then we have the whole logistics issue because the fashion industry is really centerd in NY and LA, and for some reason, I keep getting drawn to the idea of London. Everytime I have visited London, my creative juices just go into hyperdrive.
But even if I could commute from where we live (outside of Philly) to NYC everday (I did that for a few months w/my last job before I had DS1), I would never see my kids. Plus I've heard that doing a design program involves many late hours into the night working on projects. How can I justify not being there for my kids that much?
ETA:
I could get a p/t job just to offset the expenses of going to school, but I really don't have any skills (except being in the make-up industry in NYC) to market where I currently live in Philly.
But it's not like I could even compromise and start doing some sewing from home and sell on Etsy. I don't know how to sew at all and I don't know how to render my visions onto paper, but I have vision, really forward-thinking visions. I used to spot fashion trends for a major makeup company in NYC and I was really good at it. But designing clothes, that makes my heart sing, and I recently realized that we all have to do what makes our heart sing...
...it's just that intellectually, I can't wrap my head around pursuing this goal. I mean first of all, it's not like this is a well-paying field I'd be getting into. It's really risky, competitive, only the cream of the crop ever make it, and even then, with a lot of struggling and lean years. My husband makes a decent salary, but I just feel like we'd be stretching things really thin if I add the tuition for a design degree into the mix. Both my children are in school and I can't fathom sending them to public schools, especially DS1 who is very sensitive and artistic. I want to send him to a school where his talents could be nurtured, cuz public school never did that for me. Then we have the whole logistics issue because the fashion industry is really centerd in NY and LA, and for some reason, I keep getting drawn to the idea of London. Everytime I have visited London, my creative juices just go into hyperdrive.
But even if I could commute from where we live (outside of Philly) to NYC everday (I did that for a few months w/my last job before I had DS1), I would never see my kids. Plus I've heard that doing a design program involves many late hours into the night working on projects. How can I justify not being there for my kids that much?
ETA:
I could get a p/t job just to offset the expenses of going to school, but I really don't have any skills (except being in the make-up industry in NYC) to market where I currently live in Philly.
