I'm on the ledge. :( Come talk me off of it.

[Harmony96]

I need some encouragement here.

DS is 4 months old. When we started this journey at 6 weeks old, I was offering first thing in the morning (among other times) and it didn't take very long before DS started staying dry at night. But then, it started getting cold and I started staying up too late, and those two things made it hard for me to pop out of bed at the first sign of his stirring, and he started having wet diapers in the morning. No biggie, I just changed them and continued offering (even though he no longer would go in the potty first thing... but would wait until after the second nursing of the morning). I've noticed during naps that he will wake up VERY QUIETLY, like just open his eyes... and if I'm there when he wakes up like that, I can take him to the potty and he will go. But if he has started making noise by the time I get to him, then he's already gone in his diaper.

But then this morning when I got his diaper, it was soaked. Absolutely sopping
wet. And he wasn't in there for any longer time today than at other times in
the recent past. I felt bad that it was so wet.

I want to be able to pop out of bed again. I feel like I'm losing touch w/ him
and going down the path of conventionalism. Help me get back in touch w/ my baby.

[sapphire_chan]

I went to using a waterproof mat (I use the Priva mat that CVS carries) and having Lina naked. Mostly it motivates me to get up and take her to pee and if I don't it's not a huge deal.

As for naps, no help there, sometimes the tiny squeak means there's time, sometimes it means she's laying there soaked. I will say that without a diaper it's faster.

Of course with a boy you've got more places for the pee to be coming from, so maybe do a prefold and belt or something to make a tiny loincloth?

[hrsmom]

Originally Posted by Harmony96

I want to be able to pop out of bed again. I feel like I'm losing touch w/ him
and going down the path of conventionalism. Help me get back in touch w/ my baby.

You're not losing touch and going down a different path. Sometimes babies (even EC babies ) pee in their diaper or pee before you can get to them when they wake up. He's so young! It's OK!!! Things like this usually only last for a short period anyway. You're doing a great thing with your LO, and just because the diaper is soaked doesn't mean he was laying in it for any length of time. He could have just peed a ton right before you got to him. I'm sure you are in touch with your baby. You go to him when he wakes up and you change his diaper. A miss does not mean you're not in touch. Even a series of misses does not mean you're not in touch.

I don't think you're "out of touch", but if you really do need to get back in touch, the best thing I know is to wear your baby as much as possible. Skin to skin, too!

[Harmony96]

A loincloth, lol.

Well, we went from bad to worse. Today, not only was I not noticing when he peed period, I didn't notice until the diaper was already cold. And one of these was while he was IN MY LAP, coverless. *sigh*

I feel like taking a break for a few months or years, but I don't even feel like "communicating" during this break at all. Maybe I'm not cut out to be an EC mom after all. I mean, it's not for everyone.

*sigh* I really need talked off this ledge that I've walked myself onto.

[weliveintheforest]

really, you are doing great. the fact that you are even aware of your child's elimination to the extent that you are is so positive. Give yourself a break. take a day off. it's okay, you can and will stay connected, even if the connection is changing. At his age things usually start to change anyway, and this may just be a transition or something.

[claddaghmom]

We only do PT EC but being dry at night was the first thing she did.


BUT if I didn't wake up when she was awake, she seemed to give up on me and pee.

Can you offer when he has a nursing session during the night?

[Harmony96]

Originally Posted by claddaghmom

Can you offer when he has a nursing session during the night?

That would be a good idea... but he's slept through the night since he was 6 weeks old, lol.

[hrsmom]

There's nothing wrong at all with taking a break. I just did part time at first anyway, then around 3 month-ish we went full time. Except there were times when I just put a diaper and a waterproof cover on (even if I "could" have been watching and taking her) just because it was the only way I could stay sane. It really and truly is ok if they pee in a diaper or on a towel, or whatever. It's even ok if they wake up from a nap while you're wearing them on your back and they pee before you realize they're awake and it trickles all the way down your back and into your underwear. (I speak from personal experience here!) More personal experience, night time EC changed about every three weeks around here. We had dry at night, getting up to potty at night, needing to pee at night but refusing to pee in a diaper and finally peeing in the diaper as she drifted back to sleep and fussing because the diaper was wet (like 4 times a night), to finally dry at night again. It was a bit of a rough ride!

You all might be having a little bit of a potty pause, and that is part of the journey. Our first potty pause was a bit unnerving to me, but one learns to take them in stride!

You're doing great!

ETA- our first potty pause was at around 3 months old. She NEVER pooped in bed (even though she pooped four or more times a night and yes I got up to take her each time-better than changing poopy diapers in the middle of the night- but I digress!) Then one evening she pooped in bed. She did it about four nights in a row, and I was pretty rattled from that. It passed!

Your little love may even be starting to teethe, in which case these misses are good insight for you into the fact that he might be uncomfortable.

[Harmony96]

I feel like I need another observation day b/c I really don't think I treated this day any differently than normal. I did it wrong. I went back and looked at what I was "supposed" to do today and I did hardly any of that, lol. I didn't even get the carrier out at all, I didn't do any skin to skin, I didn't play with him nearly enough. I did fold some laundry while he was laying on the floor next to me and I did do some crocheting/TV watching while he was laying on the couch next to me, but that was about as close as I got to him.

I was trying to find the message but I can't remember which board it was on or who even said it, but somebody told me that the only way I could "not EC anymore" was to just go out of my way to not talk about his diaper or their contents at ALL, ever. And that's what I feel like doing.

In my limited and ineffective observation today, I noticed something. Or rather, I didn't notice something. The kid does. not. signal. At all. Not for pees. Not for poops (which are supposed to be the "easy" catches because it's "so obvious" when they are pooping). So if I continue trying to actively EC, I feel like it's going to just be one-sided, with me doing all the communicating and him just not even understanding me at all.

Which is what I did with DD.

Which led me to a nearly 20-month-long journey of potty training.

Which I don't really want to happen again. But I really don't see any other way that it COULD go, with the way I am and the way he is.

*sigh*

It was "fun" while it lasted and at least I gave it a try.

[Harmony96]

:

[sapphire_chan]

Y'know, I wish I'd gone to timing by 6 months (really before, but 6 months is when it should've been obvious to me that she wasn't going to signal for pee). We were lucky enough to mostly get signals for poop, but I kept watching for signals for pee and nada.

I think going to pure diapering for awhile could help you.

( or eat some broccoli and beans and hope he starts farting before he has to poop)

[Harmony96]

Originally Posted by sapphire_chan

Y'know, I wish I'd gone to timing by 6 months (really before, but 6 months is when it should've been obvious to me that she wasn't going to signal for pee). We were lucky enough to mostly get signals for poop, but I kept watching for signals for pee and nada.

I think going to pure diapering for awhile could help you.

( or eat some broccoli and beans and hope he starts farting before he has to poop)

I just wonder how common it is to have NO signals for poop though. I really feel alone in that. As for the farts... yesterday he started farting first thing in the morning, and finally pooped somewhere around midafternoon. Not what I'd really call a signal when it has that kind of timing, lol.