Quote:
Originally Posted by RosemaryS-F 
I don't understand the "discipline doesn't work" thing. It does too! From a VERY early age, we've been teaching ds to be a gentleman (alright, laugh, but it's true!) and the thing is, he is. He's gentle. He says please and thank you. We don't punish him, although if he is antisocial, he has to "go by himself" for a few seconds. I know that's not in sync with Unconditional Parenting, however, all the children who I know whose parents discuss issues ad nauseum with them have kids who do not listen to their parents, and talk their way out of situations. Have you ever seen Thank You For Smoking? There's a part where the lobbyist dad explains to his child that if you argue correctly, you are never wrong. I do understand the importance of dialogue, and the importance of allowing our children to express themselves. But I think we also have a job to put our foot down when necessary.
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Manners are different imo. Dd says please, thank you, and now she says excuse me 5 thousand times to get my attention. I think the op is talking about the daily constant need to keep the child from doing and getting into EVERYTHING.
To OP: sorry there is just no way around it...redirection, distraction, playful parenting, locking items up, prevention type strategies. It's exhausting, I know. I feel like I have two choices when it comes to getting dd to do or not do what I want: 1) yell, punish, time outs, etc. OR 2) make it a game, distract, redirect
Obviously I'd rather spend my time doing the second one. Both require super energy and I'd rather have my energy spent in a positive way.
The best way to discipline is model, model, model what you want them to do or say. Encourage them to do it with you and if they don't, then do it for them. If dd doesn't pick up whatever item she just threw down, I'll say something like, well then, I will pick it up because I don't want to trip or hurt my foot when I step on it. That's it. Over. No yelling. No physically forcing her to pick it up. No time out for disobedience. Nine times out of ten the next time I ask her to pick something up she will do it and I thank her for being helpful and keeping our feet safe. The discipline comes when they see what you are doing. Children want to fit in and will do things to fit into what the family does. Children want to please and be socially acceptable. I'm just speaking in general terms. Focus on telling your child what TO DO rather than what not to do.
For jumping, I allow mine to jump on the bed (it's on the floor). Maybe you could give more specific examples and we can brainstorm with you for solutions. What is he jumping on that you don't allow? Can you buy a mini trampoline for him? If I didn't want her in a room I'd buy a eye hook and place it so high on the door she can't reach even with a chair. I think prevention is great in some instances.
And finally, I give dd little jobs to do all day. She 'helps' me.

Yup things take me longer to do, but at least she is involved in a positive way instead of clinging and whining 'up, up, up' the ENTIRE time. Find some jobs for him.
Hope some of this helps!