How to get an 18-month old to stop telling his sister to 'go away'

[Wild Lupine]

At first, I thought he was just imitating his favorite song ('Go away big green monster, go away') But then I realized he was saying it in context. It is the only two word phrase he says. Sigh. Should I just be proud of his language skills? Is there anything I can do to stop this? It's not like he can substitute 'Excuse me, I need a little more personal space right now. Thank you kindly."

[Just1More]

I would say it for him. When I heard him say, "Go away," I would say, "Space, please." Or something like that. I would teach my dd to say it, too. "When ds says 'go away' he means he needs some space. Let's teach him how to say it nicely."

Then, every time he said, "Go away." I would say, "Oh, ds needs some space. Can you say, 'Space, please?'" And then, whether or not he repeated me, I would say it one more time, eith by myself or if he did, I would say, "That's right, space, please." And then make it happen, so a.) his words worked, and b.) the NEW words worked.

And I'd be prepared for it to take a long time. But I would feel like I needed to do SOMETHING, if only for the sake of the older one.

FWIW, my newly turned one yo says, "Staaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhp. Doun tuhsh!" (stop, don't touch) Lovely. I am currently ignoring it. Actually, it makes me laugh.

[sapphire_chan]

Dumb question here, but why is a 3 year old getting up in a 18 month old's space? I'd have thought the other way around would be more likely.

[Wild Lupine]

Originally Posted by sapphire_chan

Dumb question here, but why is a 3 year old getting up in a 18 month old's space? I'd have thought the other way around would be more likely.

Ha ha! It's usually over a toy, something they both want at the same time.

[Mylie]

I don't know what to tell you but I will be watching this for suggestions too..

My 2 year old says it...To complete strangers..All they have to do is look at her

She also says it too kids at daycare..Her teachers ect...Not all the time and she makes a grrrr face when she does say it..It is funny too look at but I want her to be polite too...I tell her it isn't nice but she doesn't seem to get it yet...

[Tuesday]

If redirection and other tips on this thread don't work, my advice: this too shall pass. My eldest DS (extremely intense and explosive) used to scream "Go away" if anyone dared look at him or intrude on his perceived emotional or physical space. I was terribly embarrassed especially since a few adults seemed to think it was just so oh terribly wrong and "bad" of DS.

Nothing we did or said worked. He'd SCREAM in fury - GO AWAY!

And then the phased passed and he stopped saying it. And i'd forgotten completely about this phase until I saw this thread! So take heart!

[journeymom]

Originally Posted by onemomentatatime

At first, I thought he was just imitating his favorite song ('Go away big green monster, go away') But then I realized he was saying it in context. It is the only two word phrase he says. Sigh. Should I just be proud of his language skills? Is there anything I can do to stop this? It's not like he can substitute 'Excuse me, I need a little more personal space right now. Thank you kindly."

It's not clear to me what you want to stop. Do you want him to not tell her to go away? I don't think you should. If he doesn't want her in his space he most definitely should speak up. The statement 'Go away' is short and succinct. If not blunt.

Just1more I think has it right. Support your son, but model the polite, kind, correct statement you want him to learn. Over and over.

[JessicaS]

Originally Posted by sapphire_chan

Dumb question here, but why is a 3 year old getting up in a 18 month old's space? I'd have thought the other way around would be more likely.

My nine year old is always bothering my twenty month old.

We keep telling her that Karma is going to bite her in the butt when he gets a bit bigger but she is unbelieving.

[PikkuMyy]

The 2 year old I nanny for says, "Go away and never come back" if he doesn't like something you've said or is frustrated. I usually rephrase it for him or ask questions to clarify how he is feeling.

[MusicianDad]

Originally Posted by journeymom

It's not clear to me what you want to stop. Do you want him to not tell her to go away? I don't think you should. If he doesn't want her in his space he most definitely should speak up. The statement 'Go away' is short and succinct. If not blunt.

Just1more I think has it right. Support your son, but model the polite, kind, correct statement you want him to learn. Over and over.

Gonna agree with both this post and the one referenced in this post. At 18 months he is using his language to the best of his abilities to express his need for more space. Your job it to teach him how to tactfully assert the need without hurting anyones feelings.

[journeymom]

Originally Posted by abimommy

My nine year old is always bothering my twenty month old.

We keep telling her that Karma is going to bite her in the butt when he gets a bit bigger but she is unbelieving.

You named your son Karma? That's so cool! Don't let him bite his sister's butt, though.

[sapphire_chan]

Originally Posted by journeymom

You named your son Karma? That's so cool! Don't let him bite his sister's butt, though.

[MusicianDad]

Originally Posted by journeymom

You named your son Karma? That's so cool! Don't let him bite his sister's butt, though.

I dunno, makes perfect sense... She bugs brother, Karma offers up the punishment... Then she will believe in Karma.