DH's snoring makes my skin crawl, & baby can't tolerate it.

[WindyCityMom]

I posted before about my DH's snoring and my 2 month old daughter. We all co-sleep. DD is in a sidecarred crib, next to me. My DH snores like you wouldn't believe. I'm 99% sure he has sleep apnea but he doesn't have medical insurance because my caseworker didn't put in his application when she said she did (public aid) so we have to make the trip back (she also cut off most of my benefits.. grr). Anyways.. he snores, snorts, gurgles.. all kinds of crazy noises that make me want to rip my skin off. Seriously

Our home is probably 500sqft at the MOST. DD has her own room, and we have a separate bathroom, but other than that, the living space (our bedroom, kitchen/dining area, computer area, living room) are all open. The couch I am sitting on is 15ft away from the bed. That is the farthest I can get them. Sleeping on the couch really isn't an option for me, as we co-sleep and really don't want the baby sleeping in the swing and otherwise have nowhere else to put her. Can't keep her in the crib (sidecarred) with DH and me on the couch because I probably won't hear her when she begins to fuss and I'll wake up with her screaming in hunger.

Currently (it's 2:41am) I go to sleep VERY late, as does baby. DH goes to sleep around 11pm. He wakes up around 7am, which is when baby wakes up for her first feeding. I sleep like this on purpose so baby & I can have the most restful sleep possible.. DD1 sleeps forever so thats not a problem. We wake up for the day around 12 noon..

The snoring just doesn't bother me. The baby won't nurse or latch properly when he's snoring. She chomps at my nipple and screams in hunger, she just can't focus on nursing. She can't fall asleep when he snores and I wake countless times kicking him so that he'll stop so she doesn't wake up.

He lost 30lbs like magic and still hasn't stopped snoring. About 2 years ago he weighed about 30lbs less that he does NOW, and didn't snore. I'm hopeful that this will stop..

Anyone know any remedies? Any helpful hints? Anyone in my shoes?

[sapphire_chan]

He sleeps on the couch?

Breathing strips?

He doesn't come to bed until both you and your dd have been asleep for at least 30 minutes and hopefully the snoring doesn't wake you up and hopefully it's been your subtle restlessness that woke your dd?

White noise machine?

Noise blocking earplugs for you and hopefully it's been your subtle restlessness that woke your dd?

[Louisep]

So you have 2 DDs and the elder has her own room? Can you and the baby sleep in DD1's room on a mattress on the floor?

My DH snorts and I had to kick him out (luckily we have the space) but it only seemed to affect me not DS. DH snores with weight gain and alcohol. Reducing both is the only thing that works for us. My father says elevating his pillow helps him and that it's reflux that makes him snore.

Can you DH sleep on the couch and you put a loud white noise something (a big fan perhaps?) between your bed and the couch?

[WindyCityMom]

We have an air purifier, and that helped for awhile to block out the noise, but not too much now.

DH will not (I repeat WILL NOT) sleep on the couch. That's a whole other issue between us

I can't sleep in DDs room because it's literally 6'x6', maybe a little under that on one side. Her toddler bed barely fits in there let alone another mattress or bed. A twin sized bed won't even fit in there

I'm worried about using earplugs (for me) because I won't hear the baby.
And baby really is distressed by the snoring.. not just my reactions. If I lay still and react in no way whatsoever, she still fusses once the snoring starts.

Sometimes having him roll over helps, but he yelled at me last night about telling him to. I can't roll him over because he's a big guy.

I just don't know what to do! Any ideas for helping baby sleep, at least?

[Grace and Granola]

Could your husband move into the small bedroom and you co-sleep with the kids?

I have a snoring husband, and I so feel your pain.



Have you tried a white noise machine? Not too loud so you can't hear the baby, but it will give you and the baby a sound to focus on besides the snoring.

[hakeber]

loud snoring is sometimes a symptom of sleep apnea, and is not only disruptive to your sleep but could be depriving yor dh's brain of oxygen for sigificant periods of time. My dad was a snorer all his life. You could hear him from downstairs on the other end of a huge farm house. My mom who hd never slept with himbefore their honeymoon cried till dawn that first night. My step-mom slept with industrial strength ear plugs and the ocassional sleeping pill.

Then he found out that he had a real disorder ( my uncle and my cousin have it, too) and he got this CPAP machine (his insurance covered it, won't medicaid?). It is loud, but it's white noise, which is FAR more bearable than snotty snorty snoring. And it might actually save his life. My dad found himself feeling more well rested and alert, which could very well be attributed to more oxygen reaching his bloodstream and his brain while he sleeps.

Sounds like you're hunch is spot on. See if your dh can get one: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SM1uOcufihw I mean on public aid...if it's a medical condition, no? Or are you worried he won't be covered later if he gets insurance, for it being a pre-existing condition.

Also, maybe just buy one? http://www.cpap.com/ I mean what's the worst that could happen? They are pricey, but I have friends who say the 200-400 dollar investment saved their marriage.

[hakeber]

Originally Posted by Louisep

So you have 2 DDs and the elder has her own room? Can you and the baby sleep in DD1's room on a mattress on the floor?

My DH snorts and I had to kick him out (luckily we have the space) but it only seemed to affect me not DS. DH snores with weight gain and alcohol. Reducing both is the only thing that works for us. My father says elevating his pillow helps him and that it's reflux that makes him snore.

Can you DH sleep on the couch and you put a loud white noise something (a big fan perhaps?) between your bed and the couch?

Interestingly, the sleep doctors at my dad's clinic told him it was the sleep apnea that was causing him to gain weight and giving him the inclination to drink heavily as he was feeling pretty blue a lot of the time.

Originally Posted by WindyCityMom

We have an air purifier, and that helped for awhile to block out the noise, but not too much now.

DH will not (I repeat WILL NOT) sleep on the couch. That's a whole other issue between us

I can't sleep in DDs room because it's literally 6'x6', maybe a little under that on one side. Her toddler bed barely fits in there let alone another mattress or bed. A twin sized bed won't even fit in there

I'm worried about using earplugs (for me) because I won't hear the baby.
And baby really is distressed by the snoring.. not just my reactions. If I lay still and react in no way whatsoever, she still fusses once the snoring starts.

Sometimes having him roll over helps, but he yelled at me last night about telling him to. I can't roll him over because he's a big guy.

I just don't know what to do! Any ideas for helping baby sleep, at least?

Seriously, he should be checked...loud scary snoring, weight gain, crankiness, he's got so many of the symptoms. Implore him to be checked out! It seriously changed/saved my dad's life, and I am sure it saved his marriage in many ways...well the second one, anyway. .

[Arduinna]

I'd move him into the other bedroom and have the kids cosleep with you.

[WindyCityMom]

Thank you all so much. I wish I could move him into the other bedroom but a bed won't fit in there We can try though.

About the medicaid insurance thing... We applied, and the caseworker never sent it in. This was back in Dec 09. She also never added in that I was pregnant and they cut my coverage.. and when they gave it back they gave me partial coverage that only allows women's health visits and not general medical coverage. My kids are fully covered.. anyways it was just a big mishap in the system that we're going to get fixed very soon (we've spent DHs off-days running around to other offices to get other stuff done). SO hopefully it will get done.

Baby DD doesn't mind white noise.. just the snoring It also causes him to get quite jumpy in his sleep and he flip-flips around (reminds me of a fish out of water).

[ecoleman]

Does your hubby only snore while laying on his back? That's what mine does. So annoying, so I feel your pain. Ear plugs work for me and I have seen ear plugs for children but to me it seems like it'd be a choking hazard if they fall out? Anyway, just wanted to throw in an idea I had heard about before, putting a tennis ball on his back (strapping it around him, tying to shirt, whatever) so that if he rolls onto his back it's uncomfortable and he rolls over. No clue if it works, but I'd try it if I was deperate enough!

[Jaesun's Dad]

Lucky me ... yeah I snore ... but so does my partner. I don't think either of us bother Jaesun much (and we do cosleep). We do have a white noise machine, which really helps him go to sleep and might help keep him asleep through it all (I'm pretty loud, but she can get pretty loud too!) It's a good thing our apartment walls are pretty thick I guess ... :-p

[mamaduck]

I hate it too, and wake DH up every time he snores. I don't care if he yells at me.

We run a humidifier set very high next to his side of the bed, and that seems to help. So does allergy medicine, though he argues against taking it.

I would also ask him to sleep in your dd's room -- if a bed won't fit, can you do just a matress on the floor?

[One_Girl]

Is this a new feeling for you since you had the baby or have you always hated being near him when he snores? Do you always nurse laying down or is this something you only do at night? It may be that the latch is just not correct in this position and your baby has a hard time because of that not because of the snoring. Your stress and tension surrounding this issue may also be affecting her nursing at night. If you can put a mattress on a floor in another room, then I think you should sleep there with the baby. If this not being able to stand your husband is a new feeling since the baby has come then I think you should talk to your doctor about it. This should fit under the category of maternal health because pregnancy and child birth do all kids of weird things to your emotions.

[WindyCityMom]

A twin mattress won't fit in DDs room.

I've always felt like this- when it was particularly bad I'd move to the couch, since he's a deep sleeper. I think I'm moreso agitated because it bothers our daughter.

We nurse sitting up because I'm a very milky mama and nursing laying down is like opening the flood gates The letdown issues annoy her during the beginning of the feed, but after that she's always fine. She's just crazy fussy, letdown or not, when he's snoring. She gets like that if DD1 is playing loudly or if there are too many distractions around. I have SPD and DD1 is being evaluated so maybe that's something to look into in the future for the baby since she's so easily distracted.