what NOT to say to a pregnant woman...

[at_the_hip]

How about this conversation I had at church this weekend:
>
"Are you having a boy?"

"Yes, actually, we are!"

"Oh...I thought so...when I had boys I always had pimples."
>

[BlackSheepPDX]

[mommamisty]

Wow, rude!

[AustinMom]

I'd turn and say, "oh, so you must be having a boy this time too!" Even if she was obviously not pregnant.

[COgirl19]

When I was pregnant with DD we were induced. A cousin of DH's then proceeded to tell me her horrible, blood and guts, deathly painful, "why I am never having another kid" resulting in C-section induction story. Gee thanks, your kindness and support are so reassuring....

p.s.- ending up having a good birth with happy memories. So there cousin!

[mamabearsoblessed]

ohhh Mama.
With my first dd, we knew she was a girl and once someone asked me if 'it was a girl".
"Yes" I said.
"Oh I figured, you know... they steal your beauty".

WTH??? How was that supposed to be taken???


I feel your pain. I love the comeback from Austinmom.

People are ridiculous...sigh.


that said...
Congrats on your pregnancy and upcoming bitrth!!!!

[MaerynPearl]

heh... darn those old wives tales... but they were right with my first two and if it holds up... im having a boy this time. Cuz with DD I always felt uuuuugly and DS I felt like I looked better than I had in a long time... and this time despite that I didnt lose all the weight I wanted to prepregnancy, I feel like I look great.

With DD I got a lot of people asking me if it was twins because at 28 weeks I looked 42 weeks along lol... nope. im just naturally fat, thanks.

I have a feeling the same will happen this time... Im not even a full 12 weeks and already showing visibly to people who know me.

[Pinoikoi]

Originally Posted by MaerynPearl

With DD I got a lot of people asking me if it was twins because at 28 weeks I looked 42 weeks along lol... nope. im just naturally fat, thanks.

I have a feeling the same will happen this time... Im not even a full 12 weeks and already showing visibly to people who know me.

ha ha.. I was at a church all you can eat pancake feed on Sunday... boy I bet they wish they hadn't told me it was all you can eat.

I think I put away about 8 pancakes...

[xixstar]

some people.... the first comments that have bugged me this pregnancy are:

"Oh, you don't even look pregnant" --- said once I hit 9 months... !!! Of course, once I turn sideways people then take their foot out of their mouth, but really, that's just not what you say to a woman who feels huge.

[MammaB21]

Originally Posted by xixstar

some people.... the first comments that have bugged me this pregnancy are:

"Oh, you don't even look pregnant" --- said once I hit 9 months... !!! Of course, once I turn sideways people then take their foot out of their mouth, but really, that's just not what you say to a woman who feels huge.

I got that a lot last pregnancy too. I stayed pretty small until the very end. I felt huge, but of course to others I was 'hardly even showing'....lol. This time I've popped out way sooner, so again, I'm feeling pretty big for my norm. I was carrying about 10 extra pounds to begin with this time, so my belly really poked out right away. Feeling in that in between place, I am trying to pick close that make me look pregnant. One day a few weeks back I asked my mom, "Does this make me look pregnant, or just fat?" She said, "you just look fat." Ah, gotta love her honesty!!! LOL. Really, I kinda asked for that, and I still love her. I can always count on her for an honest opinion, but at the time it sure sucked to hear.

[ColwynsMommy]

Originally Posted by MammaB21

I got that a lot last pregnancy too. I stayed pretty small until the very end. I felt huge, but of course to others I was 'hardly even showing'....lol. This time I've popped out way sooner, so again, I'm feeling pretty big for my norm. I was carrying about 10 extra pounds to begin with this time, so my belly really poked out right away. Feeling in that in between place, I am trying to pick close that make me look pregnant. One day a few weeks back I asked my mom, "Does this make me look pregnant, or just fat?" She said, "you just look fat." Ah, gotta love her honesty!!! LOL. Really, I kinda asked for that, and I still love her. I can always count on her for an honest opinion, but at the time it sure sucked to hear.

I have two pairs of pants that fit well and look nice, so I save them for when I'm going out. Most of the time I'm either in fat pants that are too big even with my pregnant belly, or PJ bottoms. The other day I was wearing a nice outfit that fit well, and my mom said, "Wow! You should wear clothes like that more often, you actually look pregnant!"

[Pinoikoi]

I have gotten, "Oh, good, it's a girl, now you can be done!"

Because that is obviously the reason why we have a large family- our futile hope for a specific gender..

[Kelly1101]

My co-worker last time... "Oh, I can tell you're having a girl, you're big ALL OVER."


Gotta laugh to keep from crying.

[mamabearsoblessed]

*sigh*

people are sooo very sensitive...

Mamas

[curvyred]

You also shouldn't call a mom with older kids a "first time mom" even if this is her first pregnancy.

I have an almost 3 year old who came home from the hospital with us. We planned to adopt first, then try for a pregnancy later. I've been called a "first time mom" and this babe referred to as "your first baby" more times than I can count.

I usually respond with, "No, my first PREGNANCY." The good people get it, the others . . . not so much.

[MaerynPearl]

Originally Posted by curvyred

You also shouldn't call a mom with older kids a "first time mom" even if this is her first pregnancy.

I have an almost 3 year old who came home from the hospital with us. We planned to adopt first, then try for a pregnancy later. I've been called a "first time mom" and this babe referred to as "your first baby" more times than I can count.

I usually respond with, "No, my first PREGNANCY." The good people get it, the others . . . not so much.

totally off topic but wanted to mention your name makes me laugh... as when I was pregnant with DS the forums I frequented there also had a curvyred in it that ended up having her child the same day I had mine lol

[milosmomma]

Originally Posted by xixstar

some people.... the first comments that have bugged me this pregnancy are:

"Oh, you don't even look pregnant" --- said once I hit 9 months... !!! Of course, once I turn sideways people then take their foot out of their mouth, but really, that's just not what you say to a woman who feels huge.

Yeah, my favorite comment (got it from several people...including my mother in law) was:

"Oh, you're barely showing. At that point in MY pregnancy, I was out to THERE (arms outstretched).....of course, I was pretty thin." Um....what are you trying to say????

[Jaesun's Dad]

Originally Posted by milosmomma

Yeah, my favorite comment (got it from several people...including my mother in law) was:

"Oh, you're barely showing. ...

My partner got that a little too. Truth was she really didn't show that much, especially compared to most of the women in our birth class who were all within two weeks of our due date. You really had to look at her from the front to be able to tell (she always had a good figure but wasn't anorexic thin or anything before).

But I thought it funny how sometimes she'd change three or four times before we went anywhere.

"I look fat!" she'd say

"No honey, you look *pregnant* ... and you're damn sexy"

And she was. ... and still is ... :-)

[beckyand3littlemonsters]

when i was pregnant with my dd chloe one of my dads old friends said "your probebly having a boy cos you've got a fat ar$e" also constantly getting "haven't you had that baby yet" as early as 24 wks

[Jelinifer]

I work with elderly people and I had a 90-something year old guy tell me yesterday that I look like the linebacker from the New England Patriots! He has Alzheimer's and had no clue what happened a second later despite the horrified looks on his kids faces. I just try to keep reminding myself of this