We didn't find out with our first and I was thinking I would probably wait to be surprised with this one. However, reading some of your posts, I am wondering if it wouldn't be fun to have a 20 week discovery to look forward to. But gendered clothing aside (I haven't had too much trouble staying away from the hyper masculine infant wear), I have a personal list of pros and cons for finding out:
- Easier to pick out a name
- Something to look forward to at the roughly half-way point
- Satisfying to friends and family - plus, then they can stop asking every five minutes.
- Don't have to live with the knowledge that the radiologist knows something I don't
- Calling out the sex when the baby is born - awesome!
- The guessing and speculation can be entertaining
- The radiologist/tech can be wrong
- Lastly and most importantly: Over the course of my firs pregnancy, I enjoyed bonding with my baby as a tiny person, not a 'he' or a 'she'. While it's true we can (sometimes) see the sex and not the gender on the scans, we live in a world where gendered social norms are imposed as quickly as possible. Essentially, finding out the sex means constructing ideas about the unborn child's gender in the minds of most people. Our children have the rest of their lives to either embrace, rail against or altogether change their assigned gender, but they can't really escape gender completely. My first baby didn't know or care that he was a boy, and neither did I. I think it is lovely to bond with the baby as a person who transcends, for a brief while, gender. just my OP.