Looking for something to read? Here's my official birth story. I'm going to post it on our site, but I have to get it from this computer to the one downstairs. It's a long story, but I think it's an intersting read. Hypnosis really worked well, I think you'll see. (Those of you doing Hypno, make sure you practice every day. It really does help!)
You can read it on our site with some pictures or below. http://homepage.mac.com/jakces/iblog...841/index.html
Around midnight on Monday, March 8th, 2004, Jason brought Jude to bed. I nursed him for a while and then realized I was having contractions so strong that I couldn’t handle the extra stimulation. I asked Jason to give Jude to my mother in the next room. “I need you,” I told him.
From there, Jason laid down behind me and held me as we rocked through the waters of labor together. I sang the song that Lisa taught me through each contraction.
“I am opening in sweet surrender
To the luminous love light of the Lord”
We laid there in bed singing sweetly to each other for quite a while, but then I had to pee. Timing our journey to the bathroom was a bit challenging, because my contractions were close together and lasting quite a while. I didn’t want to time them, but Jason said later that they were about two-and-a-half minutes apart lasting for about ninety seconds.
Then, we stayed in the bathroom for a while. Jason brought our birth ball up and I sat on that while holding onto Jason. We sang together. I would start our song off slowly and then as my contraction would build, the volume and intensity of the song would build, too. I was alone with Jason. I did my best to not think about my mother and Jude being in the house. I just needed to focus my attention on being present and open.
At one point, my mother came upstairs and said that she was going to bring Jude back up. It was everything I could do to stay focused on birth and not think about my mother being there. I turned my head away from her silhouette in the open doorway. “No,” I said into Jason’s ear, “No, no, no.” Jason looked at my mom and told her to keep Jude downstairs. “We need to be alone,” he told her.
Time past, but I didn’t really have any idea if it was hours or minutes passing us by as we were singing and rocking together. “This is the fun part,” Jason whispered in between contractions. “It sure is!” I chimed back. Then, another contraction came.
A couple times Jason asked me if I wanted to call Pat our midwife and Tressa our doula. Each time, I said no. Jason didn’t pressure me, he respected my need to just be with him.
At one point, I wanted to lay down again. We made it a few feet to the guest bedroom that was prepared for birth from the night of false labor. I had another contraction to sing through before we made it the short distance. I lay down and on the next contraction I began grunting as I sang. I rolled onto my back and pushed. I was tuned into my body. Everything felt right.
Jason said he needed to go call Pat and Tressa once he saw me pushing. I tried to ignore the feeling that I was now “on the clock” so to speak until other people came. I whispered to Jason in between contractions, “But, what if the labor stops again?” He told me to just listen to the song and be open, “This is not a time for doubt,” he said.
Tressa lived in town and so she arrived first. I heard the doorbell ring and tried to just mentally stay inside the bathroom where we had moved back to. I sang as we had been doing and tried to not be self-conscious. She came up to the doorway and I turned away from her. “By ourselves, Jason. By ourselves,” I whispered into Jason’s ear.
Tressa was very respectful of our space. She took care of birth preparations and didn’t even talk when she had questions for Jason. She wrote things on notes and passed them to him. I could deal with that much more than hearing them talk. I needed to pretend that it was still just Jason and me.
We kept singing our song. I was having trouble remember the words and I kept changing them. I was glad Jason could keep with me. He said in between contractions, “Gosh, I can tell you’re a Sparklin. You keep changing the words… and the tune… and the pauses.” We laughed together and were quickly swept away by another contraction.
Around 3am, Pat arrived. It had been three hours since I began labor. I was’t quite sure what I wanted to do. I felt like I wanted to get into the bathtub, but I wasn’t too sure I could since my water had broken on Saturday night. I asked Pat if I risked infection at this point. She said it would be fine.
In the water I pushed some more. This is when I stopped singing, but I prodded Jason to keep our song going. I focused on his words and tuned out the people that were there. It was just me and Jason bringing our baby into the world.
I wasn’t in the water very long, but I felt that it wasn’t what I wanted. I got out and we went back into the guest bedroom that was set up for birth. I pushed on my back for a couple of pushes, but it just didn’t seem like the baby was moving down to me. Pat asked me if I wanted her to check me for the first time. I agreed. There was an anterior lip in the way. She moved it, which didn’t feel great, but it was such a relief when it was gone. “Thank you so much, that’s better,” I told her.
Then, I continued pushing. I tried a supported squat once to see if it would help the baby slide under my pubic bone, but that didn’t seem to work either. I got back on the bed and we got down to business. I was getting tired. I said, “Oh, I want to rest so badly, but it will be a better rest when she’s on my chest.”
Tressa held one of my legs, Jason held the other and Pat sat between my legs. I was focused on the task at hand and enjoyed their company. I pushed and what relief to feel my hip bones spread easily and my baby slip under my pubic bone finally.
Then, I felt her fill up my birth canal. Then, my front-waters exploded all over Pat and the bed. (Turns out I only broke my smaller hind-waters) Pat asked for a towel and we pressed on.
I put my hand on my vagina to see if I could feel her. She was just beginning to show. As I felt her, the top of her head seemed to be in two parts. There was a ridge that seemed to separate the halves. It felt like one of those cheap plastic molded items where the plastic has oozed out of the mold and frozen. (After she was born we marveled at the huge ridge that had formed on her head from trying to squeeze under my pubic bone. It went away after some cranial-sacral work.) I pushed on.
I kept my hand touching her head and I grunted and moaned her head into my hand. The whole thing just felt so surreal… here I was pushing my child’s head into my hand. I started laughing deep belly laughs at the idea. Just laughing oozed her out even further, which made me laugh even harder.
Finally, I felt like I’d stretched really far, I said, “Support, support,” and Pat took her hands and supported my perineum. From there, Cicely’s head just oozed out into my hand. “Hi, baby!” I said. On the next push, her shoulders popped out and she was on my chest before I knew it.
She was so warm and wet and soft. She let out some lusty cries and I smiled so big. I was just so happy to meet her. I was overwhelmed with gratitude and joy. She made it. She took the leap of faith and I leapt, too.
She’s our Cicely Margaret.
Daddy’s little girl.
“My baby” as big brother Jude calls her.